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Old 11-28-2007, 02:17 PM
 
Location: Boonies of Georgia ~~~~ nuttier than a squirrel turd !
1,950 posts, read 5,160,511 times
Reputation: 2295

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If this story doesn't make you cry for laughing so hard, let me know and I'll pray for you.



This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years.
The only friction in there marriage was the husband's habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke.
The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.
Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick.
He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.
She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he
would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to rip them out!
Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled
on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes!
After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back
pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter.
He said, "Honey, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you."
"What do you mean?" asked his wife. "Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened.
But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and two fingers, I think I got most of them back in."
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Old 11-28-2007, 02:42 PM
 
Location: North of the Cow Pasture and South of the Wind Turbines
856 posts, read 2,921,952 times
Reputation: 2280
ahaahahahahaaha

very funny!
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Old 11-28-2007, 02:55 PM
 
Location: Central Florida
940 posts, read 1,367,904 times
Reputation: 820
Put a smile on my face for the rest of the day!! http://bestsmileys.com/lol/10.gif (broken link) Thanks!!
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Old 11-28-2007, 03:13 PM
 
Location: The 12th State
22,974 posts, read 65,527,721 times
Reputation: 15081
OH my word I should knew to stop reading after the first sentence but noooo I kept on I guess this a sure sign I need to sign off.

Im not saying if this was a good story or not lol just wrong lol.. hehe
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Old 11-28-2007, 03:17 PM
 
Location: Boonies of Georgia ~~~~ nuttier than a squirrel turd !
1,950 posts, read 5,160,511 times
Reputation: 2295
WRONG ?!?!?!

No one told him to put then back in !
LOL

Honestly, I laughed MAO
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Old 11-28-2007, 03:23 PM
 
2,392 posts, read 2,540,835 times
Reputation: 2796
Smile Hello kickinbackfl

Quote:
Originally Posted by kickinbackfl View Post
Put a smile on my face for the rest of the day!! http://bestsmileys.com/lol/10.gif (broken link) Thanks!!
I've been wondering where you've been! Nice to see you...or I mean your post.

qbaby...ok I laughed, but I was grossed out at the same time!
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Old 11-28-2007, 04:52 PM
 
Location: ~~In my mind~~
2,110 posts, read 6,957,964 times
Reputation: 1657
Hahaha, omg...that is just wrong
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Old 11-28-2007, 08:10 PM
 
2,896 posts, read 6,635,464 times
Reputation: 5054
wonder what happened to the neck
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Old 11-29-2007, 02:02 AM
 
Location: ~~In my mind~~
2,110 posts, read 6,957,964 times
Reputation: 1657
Quote:
Originally Posted by da jammer View Post
wonder what happened to the neck
LMAO, I cringe at the thought
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Old 11-29-2007, 02:23 AM
 
Location: Salt Lake City, Utah
7,731 posts, read 13,430,669 times
Reputation: 5983
Quote:
Originally Posted by theqbaby View Post


If this story doesn't make you cry for laughing so hard, let me know and I'll pray for you.



This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years.
The only friction in there marriage was the husband's habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke.
The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.
Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick.
He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.
She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he
would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to rip them out!
Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled
on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes!
After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back
pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter.
He said, "Honey, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you."
"What do you mean?" asked his wife. "Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened.
But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and two fingers, I think I got most of them back in."
Very funny!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
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