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So tell me if you think we are in the wrong here but, here's what happened to my husband and I the other day:
We traveled to another town to do a few things for the day, take our 2 yr old to chuck e cheese, maybe touch up one of my husbands old tattoos, and (perfectly candid here) we ended up finding a store to replace a broken toy of mine, as opposed to ordering online when I don't really know what I'm looking for exactly.
Our child was asleep when we arrived at the store and I went in to find what I wanted and our child woke up. She'd been in the car for almost an hour so why not let her out while their waiting for me, so my husband had her in the parking lot.
I make my purchase and I come outside and a cop is giving my husband wicked attitude about having our child there! Apparently the cop hopped out and DEMANDED that he come over in front of his car and asked him what the hell he was doing! My husband told him he was just waiting for me, that we just stopped by there on our way to Chuck E Cheese, and the cop scoffed like how dare we! He couldn't believe it! We were ready to go on our way so we all just left.
I can understand maybe a concern about perverts hanging around a sex shop, but it's not like my child was alone, or like my husband was looking for 50 bucks to trade her for an hour. It was the middle of the day, it's not like we were taking a really long time either. Does the cop really think I'm not allowed to have a sex life with my husband? If he really felt the need to say something and tell us not to be hanging around there, couldn't he have politely said,"Sir, please come here. Hey, if you're going to be waiting around here for your wife, could you just keep the kid in the car. I don't like seeing your kid out here." and my husband would have said, "Sure, officer, no problem". Did he really have to be a dick about it???
At least you didn't take the kid into the shop, and at least you didn't leave her alone in the car. At 2, she probably isn't going to be asking questions about what kind of store it is, or what mommy is doing in there, but I hope as she gets a little older you will leave her at home when you go toy shopping. The parking lot of an adult store really isn't a good place for a child.
The cop doesn't care about your sex life with your husband. He cares about what you might be exposing a young child to.
At least you didn't take the kid into the shop, and at least you didn't leave her alone in the car. At 2, she probably isn't going to be asking questions about what kind of store it is, or what mommy is doing in there, but I hope as she gets a little older you will leave her at home when you go toy shopping. The parking lot of an adult store really isn't a good place for a child.
The cop doesn't care about your sex life with your husband. He cares about what you might be exposing a young child to.
Or whether your husband really might be renting her out by the half hour. He has no way of knowing that he's not, other than his word, and few baby pimps would admit it to a cop. And while "innocent until proven guilty" is supposed to be the ideal, I'd be awfully glad if the LEO turned the same suspicion on a trio of young men loitering outside my house at 3am. Maybe they're just neighbor kids on the way home, but it doesn't hurt to ask. Likewise, maybe your husband is a heckuva guy waiting for his wife. It doesn't hurt to ask.
Next time, go toy shopping by yourself. You don't need hubby. And you certainly don't need to do it on a family outing with your child.
I can understand that you may have been innocently scheduling your errands, but it was unwise to take your child to a toy shop parking lot, father or no father in the car.
As rbk said, at least she's 2 right now. But there is no darn good reason for her to ever be with you again.
You're seriously asking for trouble if you continue to do take her there with you. You'll end up being investigated by CPS regardless of innocence.
You have a choice, stand up for your rights and continue doing as you please or protect your family by following social norms of keeping children away from adult stores.
I really don't see the big problem with her being OUTSIDE the store WITH her father. If she had come in with you that would have been inappropriate. I think the cop was right to stop and ask who this man was with a little girl outside a sex shop, but once he learned the circumstances, no, he didn't have to be a jerk about it. He may not personally approve, but as long as it's not a crime to have your child outside the store with her parent, then he could have just moved along.
However, that is a stop I would have made without my kid with me. But I do know that having a little kid (your 1st?) you do things trial and error, and you learn from your experience. I guess it is good it was a cop instead of a civilian who could have wrote down your plates and had child services at your door. At least it's over and done with.
So I suppose I should have dropped them off at Chuck E Cheese and gone by myself? We don't have anyone around that we want to leave our daughter with, no babysitters or anything, so she's with one of us always. And my husband and I were planning on making a decision on something together, and as I said, she was asleep until we turned the car off.
It is my first and my husbands second child. And yes, if she was 6, we wouldn't have taken her with us.
And it's not like I go to toy shops often. I made my last purchase online and that lasted me 5 years. I've now bought only 2 toys in my life!!!
I guess my point was more or less that he didn't have to be so damn rude about it.
I've been to plenty of those shops and they are generally not in places where I would be standing outside with a 2 year old. I would be pretty suspicious of some guy hanging out with a toddler. Also I think it's illegal for a minor to be in an adult store (or at least in the sections selling certain toys), which would be a concern for a cop. I know your child didn't go inside but that's not necessarily what it looks like to an outside observer.
The police officer did what he is trained to do and probably knew the area pretty well and what can go on. You were not harmed. I don't see a problem here except you feel "dissed" by the cop. Nobody said anything about your sex life but it's not a place kids usually hang out..
So I suppose I should have dropped them off at Chuck E Cheese and gone by myself? We don't have anyone around that we want to leave our daughter with, no babysitters or anything, so she's with one of us always. And my husband and I were planning on making a decision on something together, and as I said, she was asleep until we turned the car off.
Wait.
So the initial plan was the leave her asleep alone in a car parked in a sex shop parking lot while your husband went inside with you to make the decision together.
And her waking up when the car turned off was the only reason your husband stayed outside with her.
You didn't see anything wrong with that plan?
Quote:
Originally Posted by SallyLynn812
I guess my point was more or less that he didn't have to be so damn rude about it.
Now that you shared that the original plan was to leave her alone in the car, I'm glad he was rude about it.
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