Thanks everyone for your responses.
Sorry if some of what I explained was kinda incomplete/ "all over the place".
To fill up some gaps - I do love her and her son.
I have helped pay for more than my half of the bills.
I have tried over and over to spend time with her son
alone and with her.
In fact - Everyday He is at home at our apartment because
he is home schooled (pc) and He doesn't have very many friends.
Lately I have been losing more trust for my girlfriend because
even though her and I love eachother, I have my doubts because of
all the issues.
I am not perfect. I have made mistakes with arguing with his mother.
Lately - I found that they were both checking out prices for other
apartments/places to live.
I confronted my girlfriend about it and she responded "well, I donno."
We talked for a while and seemed to "make up" yet I still feel as if
I cannot trust them.
I am not playing games. (I hate games)
Her son sneeks around the halls and acts all meek with me
Yet can act like a total pain to her while I'm not around
or when he is upset.
I love them both, But I do not trust them.
I don't deserve or need these games..
The only things that are making me hold on is -
I believe that I love her and her son.
I keep believing that things can change (other than just me changing for them)
I believe that maybe either things will get better with time -
Either they will stop being so suspicious living a life behind my back, etc.
I ask myself these questions -
What are you to chicken $%@7 to leave?
How long do you think you can do this?
With the death of my mom and all the confusion to begin with -
I don't even know what I want anymore.....
Maybe I just want to run away from everyone to another state/country
and get the hell away from everyone. - If I did that though, I wouldn't
be around for family.
It seems as if I make a point to ALWAYS try to be nice to them and
never lay down rules or have a say - Then things are alright.
I can't live that way though. It's fake and pathetic.
I don't know. Either way things will work out is what I keep telling myself.
We will either stay together and work things out or
Her and her son will leave me, Or I will go out of my mind enough to where
I finally leave, whatever.
I hope things can work out... But it takes 2 people for that. If she cannot meet me half way or even realize that Her and I (relationship) has a area of it's own. -
To hell with counselling for me. I'm so tired of counselling and therepy because of the kid having to go through it. I know what I want.
I want to take care of these two because I love them.
They are acting like its a joke when I'm not around and
trying to put limits on my standards.
No child/kid has a right to have that kind of control with a parent/adult
especially if they are their own/living with them.
No woman has the right to control their man - Even if he is her son.
"Fine then - control your son - Not me."
I have always been a hard working man that loves family.
I will always continue to be that way.
I was brought up that rules are rules from the parents.
And the only negotiation I was given as a child was "which end
of the belt would you like".
Anyways, Can't do that anymore. Discipline - Respect - Morals.
What are those right? We live in a "New Generation".
Sorry - Got off track.
Thank you all for your thoughts towards all this crap.
If anything, It is good just to talk about it.