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My wife and I are really considering having another child. We both were only children and know how lonely that gets, also just having a sibling to be there when you need someone to talk to is something we never had and wished we had. So, are there any parents in here that wished they had another child? For those with an older child, do they seem to regret not having a sibling? My biggest worry is financial, being able to take care of another child but I think we will be able to.
I always wanted 2. I was one of 2, and so was hubby. We have 2, two years apart in age. It seems to me if you can afford 1, you can afford 2. If you can't even afford the one you have, then having another is probably not a good idea.
My wife and I are really considering having another child. We both were only children and know how lonely that gets, also just having a sibling to be there when you need someone to talk to is something we never had and wished we had. So, are there any parents in here that wished they had another child? For those with an older child, do they seem to regret not having a sibling? My biggest worry is financial, being able to take care of another child but I think we will be able to.
We have an only child who is 11. She is the happiest kid I know. Sure, she wishes she has a sibling, but I think she fantasizes how fun it would be. We have always made sure that she wasn't lonely. From very early on we encouraged playdates and then later sleepovers. She has tons of great friends who are very important to her. We never say no to having kids over here or her going to someone else's house. She has a better social life than most kids. She gets tons of attention from us, and we have always played with her: games, etc. My poor husband has even played dolls with her in the past.
I have a brother and we hardly played together as kids. Many kids fight with their siblings or they are jealous of them. Not to say, that many people adore their siblings and are so lucky to have that close bond. But most kids I know play with their friends not their siblings.
We live in an expensive city and having one has allowed us to give her great opportunities including sleepaway camp. We could not have done that with two kids.
If you have one, make sure they have tons of social opportunities and you are good to go.
I always wanted 2. I was one of 2, and so was hubby. We have 2, two years apart in age. It seems to me if you can afford 1, you can afford 2. If you can't even afford the one you have, then having another is probably not a good idea.
Yes, I keep hearing that 1 vs 2 is not much different financially and our daughter is 6yrs old, so she is out of the diaper, baby food etc stage, so I think we'll be ok.
Yes, I keep hearing that 1 vs 2 is not much different financially and our daughter is 6yrs old, so she is out of the diaper, baby food etc stage, so I think we'll be ok.
I think it all depends on where you live and how much enrichment and childcare is. We probably would have had a second child if we lived in the suburbs or country, but then again we were very content having one.
. Sure, she wishes she has a sibling, but I think she fantasizes how fun it would be.
I have a brother and we hardly played together as kids. Many kids fight with their siblings or they are jealous of them. Not to say, that many people adore their siblings and are so lucky to have that close bond. But most kids I know play with their friends not their siblings.
If you have one, make sure they have tons of social opportunities and you are good to go.
I had plenty of friends when I was younger also but as I got older and more picky about the people I have around, I do wish I had a close sibling. I have a co-worker whose mom had cancer and recently passed away and she came to me in tears about how hard it was not having siblings to help out and the toll it has taken. Even though siblings sometimes dont get along when they are young, when they get older and a major event(good or bad) happens, they are always there for each other-rarely anything breaks that blood-bond.
I had plenty of friends when I was younger also but as I got older and more picky about the people I have around, I do wish I had a close sibling. I have a co-worker whose mom had cancer and recently passed away and she came to me in tears about how hard it was not having siblings to help out and the toll it has taken. Even though siblings sometimes dont get along when they are young, when they get older and a major event(good or bad) happens, they are always there for each other-rarely anything breaks that blood-bond.
That's true. It's my one concern. When my husband and I are older and in need of help, she is the only one. I just hope and pray that she has a family of her own. If something happened to my parents I don't think my brother would be a source of comfort. We get along, but my husband is who I would turn to or friends. Far too many siblings stop talking when a parent is elderly or dies. I have heard countless stories of one sibling feeling like they are the only one who taking care of Mom or Dad when they are in their later years or siblings fighting over who gets what when someone dies. I have also seen where a parent is the glue that keeps a family together and everyone goes separate ways when they die. No garantees that it will be a love fest.
we were just talking about this at our house. I was going to start a thread but I just hadnt yet. We have a 4 year old. Me and my husband, before our son was born and even for probably the first year after he was born, we discussed having at least one more. Then over a period of time of us gaining independence with our little family of 3, in terms of ease of life, and me focussing on my college education and becoming comfortable, I thought very hard about children. And I truly feel fulfilled with my son. He fulfills my maternal need. I dont feel guilty that he is an only child, he plays community sports and goes to parties and has friends and he starts school soon and will be with those extra children. he gets all my love and affection. I just dont think I want or need any more children to feel like our family is complete.
I had not ever really had this conversation with my husband, there were just always reasons to put it off. I graduate college in December, then start on pre-apps for more education at a higher level, but that wont be for another year or so. We are moving to a bigger house in about 2 weeks. Now would be the time.
I said to my husband "is there a true aching need in heart to have more children or do you want more to give DS a sibling?" He thought about it for a few minutes while I explained that if he really feels a need to have another child, I will do that for our family. He came to the conclusion that he feels paternally fulfilled with our child, and feels like our family is complete with the 3 of us. So babymaking is on the back burner. Im only 25. There is nothing that says if we really want to, we cant try anytime in the next 10 years. But I think its just one for us.
Has anyone faced any obstacles with family on this decision? Today I was talking to my sister and told her of our decision and she said she wanted a niece. Its not a big deal, just make a baby. But it is a big deal to me....
Never use money as a reason to have or not have a child...People have been having kids for thousands of years...what you toss in the garbage is enough to feed two more children...
Never use money as a reason to have or not have a child...People have been having kids for thousands of years...what you toss in the garbage is enough to feed two more children...
ridiculous statement
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