Retrospective Advice to Parents of Young Children. (boy, son, twin)

[ovcatto]

The time period in which children grow from infancy to adulthood is governed less by biology than it is by physics.

Like the Twin Paradox described by Einstein's Law of Special Relativity, parents and children age at relatively different rates, which means that as they travel through to adult hood they age at rate faster than than their parents. As a result what appears to a period of 21 years to a child seems like a few months to a parent; well perhaps it may not seem true during 4:00 AM feedings, pre-school temper tantrums or the belligerent displays during adolescence, but you will have no doubts about the veracity of this theorem when they reach adulthood.

I know this to be a fact as a result of 21 years of intensive research and reflection. My evidence is based upon the fact that my daughter will be 21 years old this month and frankly, it seems like literally yesterday that I was bringing her home for the first time. So where did the time go, I have no clue which is why I had to seek an explanation in the laws of physics. I may not be Steven Hawkins or Peter Higgs but I am certain that my theory is correct.

So what is my advice? Savor every minute of your child's life because no problem (well... there are exceptions) is so earth shattering, or enduring to be intolerable over the long haul. In retrospect even their worst behavior can be a basis for bemusement at a later date which probably explains the unlimited patience of grandparents. It will long be the totality of the experience that is important, even if the details become vague memories, don't worry your children will remember in vivid detail every embarrassing moment or fault of parenting that you ever committed.

So just remember you only get one shot per child child at being a parent. Make the most of it, the good and the bad because the experience will be over in the blink of the proverbial eye.

One last thing, on a daily basis take time every day to listen to or better yet read and heed the lyrics of Harry Chapin's "Cat's in the Cradle" so that in the future you can state without reservation that it doesn't apply to you.

My child arrived just the other day
He came to the world in the usual way
But there were planes to catch and bills to pay
He learned to walk while I was away
And he was talkin' 'fore I knew it, and as he grew
He'd say "I'm gonna be like you dad
You know I'm gonna be like you"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you comin' home dad?
I don't know when, but we'll get together then son
You know we'll have a good time then

My son turned ten just the other day
He said, "Thanks for the ball, Dad, come on let's play
Can you teach me to throw", I said "Not today
I got a lot to do", he said, "That's ok"
And he walked away but his smile never dimmed
And said, "I'm gonna be like him, yeah
You know I'm gonna be like him"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you comin' home son?
I don't know when, but we'll get together then son
You know we'll have a good time then

Well, he came home from college just the other day
So much like a man I just had to say
"Son, I'm proud of you, can you sit for a while?"
He shook his head and said with a smile
"What I'd really like, Dad, is to borrow the car keys
See you later, can I have them please?"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you comin' home son?
I don't know when, but we'll get together then son
You know we'll have a good time then

I've long since retired, my son's moved away
I called him up just the other day
I said, "I'd like to see you if you don't mind"
He said, "I'd love to, Dad, if I can find the time
You see my new job's a hassle and kids have the flu
But it's sure nice talking to you, Dad
It's been sure nice talking to you"

And as I hung up the phone it occurred to me
He'd grown up just like me
My boy was just like me

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you comin' home son?
I don't know when, but we'll get together then son
You know we'll have a good time then

[purehuman]

Yes...your children most times are indeed a reflection of you....