Should I give up on trying to "man up" a 7 year old? (punishment, teens)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
This is an EXCELLENT idea! Contrary to what some people think, a good martial arts program will foster self-discipline, boost social skills, and increase self-esteem:
what if the kids just isn't interested in martial arts! You can't make a kid be interested in something he just isn't interested in. If he wants to then it might do him some good but if he doesn't it would just be another opportunity for the man to put him down for not being who and what he thinks he should be.
Don't worry about skipping and prancing, but the second he looks at that Barby commercial too long or walks around with his wrist folded or with his hips shaking, its sports team enrollment time.
Martial arts ore over-rated and often give the students a false sense of security.
You obviously misunderstand the point of martial arts.
It is not to build a person up physically on the outside, it is to build them up on the INSIDE.
Martial arts has helped many a scrawny scared little boy to gain complete self-confidence and self-control - it's about the mind and spirit being strong.
The physical strength that comes from martial arts is just a nice consequence.
If martial arts don't seem to be the way to go, how about youth soccer? OP, you could offer to coach or referee. Just keep the focus on teamwork and sportsmanship/fair play, rather than on winning at all costs.
This would let the little guy get his skippies out by running around, kicking the ball, whooping and hollering in a socially acceptable way, while being with other kids his own age, rather than two years younger. And it will expose him to both winning and losing, and will help teach him that there is always another day, when you're seven, and that losing is not the end of the world.
But there's nothing in the world wrong with a seven year old skipping when he's happy. Shows he has pretty good coordination, in fact...
As you have pointed out, he has not had a male figure in his life.
I would wonder if your #1 job might best be to make him confident with a male, especially an older one. Take an interest - or fake it, in what he is interested in, and congratulate him on those things he does well. I would think that over time you could be very valuable in building his self-confidence...and in perhaps, just perhaps, at some point wanting to take on some of the "man up" stuff you might have to offer.
Being a guy who is there for him, and says, "Hey, that's great what you did," is my guess about what you could best do for him. He will change in many ways and in many stages, but be prepared for the fact that any of his future personalities are still likely to have some of this "wussy" element that bothers you now. But I think self-confidence could be your gift to him.
I decided to spend some time alone with him and try to bond with him and get to know him and also allow him to bond with me and get to know me as well.
It was remarkable how excited he got when I told him I would be picking him up from school and that we were going to go do something special just the two of us. He literally ran from the classroom to my truck when school let out. We went to the nearby lake and had lunch and afterwards we went on a tour of the lake via boat. It was a lot of fun and the whole time we were walking about his skipping actually seemed to lessen and almost go away completely. He seemed a bit disappointed when our little adventure was over but promised him that we would do something together at least once a week since things went really well.
Here is where things get a little strange. We get home and his mom tried to talk to him and ask him how our day went and he seemed to cop and attitude with her as if he didn't seem to think it was any of her business. Not sure why the sudden change of attitude but it happened and it actually started getting worse. When it came time for homework he was being extremely difficult and he would not listen when she tried to help (she helps him with his homework since I am usually at work at these times).
So what do you think happened? Why has his behavior changed with him mom all of a sudden?
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
