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^^I'm not sure I can express it well. It's sort of like talking about how much you make. It just seems so gauche. It starts in the "Mommy and Me" groups: MY kid is crawling, walking, talking, running a 5K at age 3, constant comparisons. I remember once when my oldest was about a year, we had a Lamaze reunion. Shortly thereafter, I ran into a woman from that group and she said 'isn't your kid the one who wasn't doing much'? (This wasn't true, but of course, some were walking, some weren't. The ones whose kids were walking felt so superior.) It just keeps going on.
Sure, there's parental pride. I'm proud of my kids, too, even if they weren't walking at a year. But you don't have to constantly tell people how your kid was in a gifted program. The criteria for those programs is often nebulous. When they did reinstitute it in our district, if the parent asked for the kid to be placed in the program, the kid got in. As for the rest of it, how they're in med school, they're this, they're that, in a social setting, you might wait until someone asks, anyway.
Couple of things. You can't really know how someone is feeling. Not all people need you (general you) to be wrong in order for them to be right. Second, just because some people do feel superior or have negative intentions when discussing it doesn't mean everyone does. Some people likely just want to share their joy and that should be encouraged IMO.
As far as public education goes, I imagine resources could be an issue. The basics are required for the population and those challenged have to be dealt with. A gifted curriculum that is on the tax payer's dime would seem more like a privilege. Anyhow, I do think gifted children should certainly have more made available to them, but it's likely a responsibility that should primarily be driven by the parent.
Why would gifted kids be entitled to anything less than any other person? Public education is for the general public. Gifted kids are part of the general public. I don't understand why a child with an IQ of X is entitled to an appropriate education but a child with an IQ of X+ should have his education primarily driven by his parents.
^^I'm not sure I can express it well. It's sort of like talking about how much you make. It just seems so gauche. It starts in the "Mommy and Me" groups: MY kid is crawling, walking, talking, running a 5K at age 3, constant comparisons. I remember once when my oldest was about a year, we had a Lamaze reunion. Shortly thereafter, I ran into a woman from that group and she said 'isn't your kid the one who wasn't doing much'? (This wasn't true, but of course, some were walking, some weren't. The ones whose kids were walking felt so superior.) It just keeps going on.
Sure, there's parental pride. I'm proud of my kids, too, even if they weren't walking at a year. But you don't have to constantly tell people how your kid was in a gifted program. The criteria for those programs is often nebulous. When they did reinstitute it in our district, if the parent asked for the kid to be placed in the program, the kid got in. As for the rest of it, how they're in med school, they're this, they're that, in a social setting, you might wait until someone asks, anyway.
Context matters. Perhaps if you are talking about the kids swinging on the swings it is inappropriate to bring up gifted classes. But when participating in a thread that is about whether the term gifted is being overused sharing personal experiences shouldn't necessarily be considered bragging. It is appropriate to the conversation.
It's been pointed out to you before that not all schools work the same way your kids' school worked. In many, many places, kids need the label in order to work above a level.
Yes, I needed to have that "pointed out" to me. Why, I had no idea! Maybe we could get this thread back on track instead of making snarky comments.
Context matters. Perhaps if you are talking about the kids swinging on the swings it is inappropriate to bring up gifted classes. But when participating in a thread that is about whether the term gifted is being overused sharing personal experiences shouldn't necessarily be considered bragging. It is appropriate to the conversation.
I said, it's hard to explain. You're probably right about that.
And I don't doubt for one minute that some, not specifically anyone posting right now, use these forums to brag about their own kids. I've seen plenty of bragging and sanctimonious posts on this parenting forum, and all parenting forums.
This thread started out being about how 96% of a kindergarten class can't be gifted. I agree with that. Then people started talking about their own gifted children.
While I don't believe my children are gifted, I think one comes very close in a couple areas, and especially in elementary school I don't think there is very much effort to meet the needs of those types of kids...at least in our school district.
In junior high and high school there seems to be more offerings for kids that might be looking for something more challenging without having to jump through all the hoops it takes it get into the gifted program.
Being "gifted" is something a person is born with. Is it really bragging to talk about it, when it has nothing to do with the parents, other than their genes?
I suspect so many people consider talking about a "gifted" kid bragging because so many people think their children are gifted. It gets to the point that saying "my kid is gifted" means nothing - it is suspect because, as the original post said, so many parents think that.
I qualified for GT in school. I am certainly not a genius. I'm not going to be a CEO or a famous scientist. I don't really want to be anyway. I honestly don't care if I was labeled gifted or not.
Even as a child, I knew that I did think differently from a lot of my other classmates. I needed the accelerated learning and I needed a different and deeper way of analyzing things. I needed that like I needed air....I remember being 4 and thinking my head might actually explode if I had to sit quietly in a dim room with nothing to look at or do for a minute longer.
My 4-year-old is the exact same way. My daughter is to a lesser extent.
I don't care if they have the highest IQs. I only want them tested for GT because the way those classes are taught will work better for them than the way the other classes are taught.
When I was in elementary school in Sweden back in the 80's I never ever heard of anything called gifted. Every school had one exceptional student. We had one girl who never had anything less than an A on all her tests and grades all the way thorough school, and high school. She was not your average hard working student. She just got it, the first time, and never had to study hard for anything. I would guess in today's standard she would be considered gifted too.
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