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Luckily we now have 3 grand daughers. All the fun of girl children with none of the angst as parents of girls lol. Boy children are much easier as parents imo.
It all works out in the end.
That's a very interesting perspective! I wonder how many families might be a bit smaller if the parents thought about the potential that exists in their grandchildren for that boy/girl they always wanted? Obviously not quite the same but might help the "adjustment".
Two. I wish we had 4. We live in the Midwest and 2/3-5 is the usual range. I would not be dismissive of another if I were you, though I would be cautious and thoughtful in approaching. Try not to live with regrets. I regret not having more, but because of the demands of my career it would have been selfish.
If you want to parent a daughter, try fostering. If you want to have fourth, marry a younger man who has never had children before. If you want to have a future with your husband and not shortchange a potential child of their dad, stay with your husband, learn hobbies together and have conversations that are not child-related.
I'm biologically too old to have any more children, and I would definitely NOT want another one at this stage in my life. We have 2: daughter, 26, and son, 23. Two was enough as we could "divide and conquer." When their activities overlapped one of us was always able to be with one of them.
A family I know has 9 children--all boys. She kept trying for a girl--even into her 40's. Some of those boys are messed up as she didn't have the time or inclination to properly care for them all.
I chose to have only one...a daughter, and haven't ever regretted my decision. My parents didn't have such choices, as they were married during WWII...had one every two years until there were three, then tried not to have more. But back then, birth control wasn't so easy, and they had another one seven years after the third (they were in their 40's by then). They really loved her, but being parents to a baby in their forties wasn't so easy. They were uniformly strict with the other kids, but not strict with the last, which led to resentment from the older children. And lasting multiple problems for the youngest. Just sayin', not everyone can handle that later in life. Some can, some can't. And keep in mind, your husband is NOT on board with this...he might really resent being forced to become a parent again.
We're expecting our fifth. Our oldest is a boy, the rest are girls; we're not sure about the baby's gender. The girls are SO much fiercer than the boy. And none of them resemble one another in personality, either. Completely random and different.
Both my husband and I were only children (with older parents), so having a large family is a new experience for us. FWIW I started having kids in my early/mid 20's, and I'm now approaching 35. I feel almost too old to have a child now; so he/she will be our last.
Two. I wish we had 4. We live in the Midwest and 2/3-5 is the usual range. I would not be dismissive of another if I were you, though I would be cautious and thoughtful in approaching. Try not to live with regrets. I regret not having more, but because of the demands of my career it would have been selfish.
I'm not sure where you live in the Midwest, but that average you listed is far to high. The average between states is 1.70-2.40. The only areas that have a much higher average than that are LDS dominated areas, Amish majority areas, and First Nation Reservation areas. The average total fertility rate for the US as a whole is below 2.00 presently.
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