Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
We're moving to TX from MI in 2 weeks & I wondered if there were any resources for talking with my 5 & 3 year olds about it? They have been in on the dialogue from the beginning but still seem to think we're coming "home" once we're done with our little "trip" to TX. The roadtrip itself is part of the conversations we have been having (won't it be fun?!), but how do I help them accept that we won't be coming back to our home, will go to a new school, leave our friends & family and start a new life, basically, in a new state? We will know no one in TX when we move there.
(I should also add that the first few conversations our kids witnessed about the move were not all positive - my husband was laid off here & this was the best opportunity he could find, but having lived in MI all my life near my family, this has been hard on me. I know I shouldn't have let the kids see me sad about it, but I explained that I was just a little worried but that it will be great).
We have been trying to pump them up ever since.
We are from Wi and moved to Pa last summer.My kids were 10,7,and 3 at the time.We also talked about it with them right from the beginning.To be honest, it was not that difficult.It was the hardest on the oldest of course,but by the time we left,he was fine.I think the main thing is for the two of you to remain positive and upbeat.Kids that young will be fine as long as they are with Mom and Dad.Once they see your new house,it won't take long for them to settle in.The best thing you can do is make sure you find a neighborhood with lots of kids.Once my kids got here and the neighbors started coming over,they were happy! GOOD LUCK! I know it's hard to leave the great Midwest,but as long as you all are together,you'll be OK.
I found keeping it positive was a big factor. If you're worried, they will pick up on it immediately. Once you are in your new home, we found setting up their rooms FIRST and having their toys and books and videos easily available really helps. Kids that young (and mine were just a little younger when we moved from FL to NM) really adapt quickly to new situations. Keep their routine as normal as possible, once you've arrrived in TX, and they'll be ok.
If you are a SAHM, check out local Mom's Groups, such as MOPS or MOM'S CLUB, which are a good way for both you and your kids to meet people. If you are working, check the neighborhoods for parks and activities that you can get involved with. You'll be fine - making a big change can be daunting, but it can also be an adventure for you and your family. Good Luck
Location: Jonquil City (aka Smyrna) Georgia- by Atlanta
16,259 posts, read 24,772,368 times
Reputation: 3587
Quote:
Originally Posted by motown mary
We're moving to TX from MI in 2 weeks & I wondered if there were any resources for talking with my 5 & 3 year olds about it? They have been in on the dialogue from the beginning but still seem to think we're coming "home" once we're done with our little "trip" to TX. The roadtrip itself is part of the conversations we have been having (won't it be fun?!), but how do I help them accept that we won't be coming back to our home, will go to a new school, leave our friends & family and start a new life, basically, in a new state? We will know no one in TX when we move there.
(I should also add that the first few conversations our kids witnessed about the move were not all positive - my husband was laid off here & this was the best opportunity he could find, but having lived in MI all my life near my family, this has been hard on me. I know I shouldn't have let the kids see me sad about it, but I explained that I was just a little worried but that it will be great).
We have been trying to pump them up ever since.
Little kids like that usually don't care. In fact many of them like changes. The only exceptions I see are only children who are much more attached to their friends for companionship.
Now if you have a high school kids, that is another matter. Trying to relocate a high school kid- especially a daughter- will be Hell on Earth.
I highly recommend the book "Moving with Kids" by Lori Collins Burgan. You can order it from Amazon.com or go to Barnes and Noble. It's only $9.95 and is a really quick read. She gives very practical and helpful advice. I bought the book about a month before we moved with my four and six year old boys. It was VERY helpful....from packing your kids' rooms last (so their boxes and beds are first off the truck once you reach your destination), to setting up their bedrooms first thing (before you unpack your kitchen stuff) so they feel grounded and in control of their surroundings. She also suggests getting right out their into your new neighborhood by having the kids and you walk the dog, looking for playground equipment, trampolines, etc. in neighbors yards as you walk by so you know who might have kids, and knocking on their doors to introduce yourselves. It's a great book and gave helpful advice.
We will be staying in an apartment for the first 4 months to figure out where we want to live, so the "transition" period will be drawn out longer. And it is a 2 bedroom (we have 3 kids, the third is a baby), so it's not like I can set up their rooms as they were here. I know it's all about making them feel comfortable...
We are in a similar situation as you are. We are also in a transition house. We moved from a comfortable 4 bedroom, 2.5 bath home that we owned to a two bedroom, one bath bungalow that we're renting. So the boys have to share a bedroom and this house is much too small for comfort. And we can't nail anything in the walls or decorate or 'nest' the way we want. We're renting for 4-6 months until we get a good feel for which suburb we want to settle down and purchase a house in. So sadly, we must uproot them again, whether it's across town or a whole new suburb. YIKES! But I still found the book I previously mentioned to be helpful and insightful. Like you said, it's all about making your kids feel comfortable and secure. Some days it's quite a challenge, other days it's a fun adventure.
We've gone through your experience twice now and I've just learned that it's harder on me than my kids. My kids had a really hard time leaving our first house. They just seemed traumatized and I tried my hardest to make our new home seem like home. We have since moved again (twice in one year and this time cross-country--it sounds like we went through what you did but we went through it twice) and my kids handled it real well but it was an adjustment. Our new home, which is a rental so no pictures, etc., is half the size of our former home. Despite some initial comments, the girls have adapted and are happy. I got them in activities and planned outings immediately which helped the days go by--and I really think this is the KEY. I unpacked things that are special to them and left the rest in storage since I knew we would be moving again at then end of the year. Recently, we traveled back to our old house where three of my kids came home to and my kids didn't even remember it (and it's only been 18 months since we moved from there!). Your kids will be fine. You will have a tougher time than they will. Just act excited and hide as much nervousness and trepidation as you can! PS - I had four children under the age of 5 when I made the move nine months ago.
Last edited by 5FLgirls; 03-17-2008 at 12:14 PM..
Reason: forgot something
Trying to relocate a high school kid- especially a daughter- will be Hell on Earth.
Ain't this the truth!!!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
