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You know this based on which specific facts? From the OP's initial message and follow on comments, her sons' potential trip to a relatively distant location could be for entirely other reasons with the added benefit of a side visit with relatives. Possibilities as an example, camping/hiking in distant national parks, hitting up some soccer or baseball games at faraway stadiums, kicking back at beaches checking out and chasing some attractive young ladies, etc. Then, potentially a quick "hi Aunt Sue, Uncle Bill, et al. and soon after some fine Great Lakes boot camp discipline.
My grandkids have never met some of their cousins since the cousins live in India. They will be going this year with their dad to meet them and may never see some of the older generation again since some of them are elderly. They have one set of cousins who live in the US and who they do see once or twice a year. These cousins even though they are in the US are not in Texas, but in Illinois which is a long trip for them. They go because it is their other grandfather who lives in Chicago and they see the cousins while they are there.
OK, I've been pretty steadfast in saying I think DS should have to hold up his end of the bargain to be allowed to go on this trip. I also said the OP could maybe lighten up the requirements a little.
I want to emphasize, this trip is some sort of annual event, OP doesn't say what. Incidentally, DS would have the chance to see some relatives he hasn't seen in a long time because ??? DS is graduating from high school (?) and joining the navy.
I still think DS should have to hold up his end of the agreement, or whatever the OP and he bargain it down to. It sounds very much like the event is the main part of the trip, and "Oh, by the way Aunt Mary, will you be home on Friday the 15th so we can get together? No? Well, OK." These are obviously not close relatives.
I think this joining the Navy business is a red herring in the discussion. Most kids who graduate from high school do something with their lives afterward. Some go off to college, including out of state. And holy cats, the DS isn't going to the moon or something, as some seem to infer. He'll have more flexibility than if he were joining the Peace Corps, from what I've heard from friends whose kids have done so. Even in wartime, which this is not, the military get leave time, and they do get paid well enough to be able to afford a trip.
Anyway, OP, this thread probably hasn't helped you much.
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