Daughter doesn't seem to enjoy girl scout troop (ideas, parents, wife)

[Me 82]

But if you ask her, she says she really likes it and wants to stay in it. She's 7 by the way, so what do you do?

In all honesty, I think it's kind of lame and the troop is nothing like the Brownie troop that I was in for 2 years growing up. We did really cool crafts, Xmas caroling and other community service. We joined very late in the year last right (May), bu me suggesting it. We moved out of state and into school mid year, and I "thought" this would be a way to meet other girls. Two of her classmates from last year are in the troop. She would occassionally talk to them when we first joined, but a few of the mothers seemed a little "cliquish" always referring to themselves as the "originals" since this troop started 2 years earlier. We weren't even in the school then.

Fast forward last week we had our first meeting. My daughter talked about being excited to see one of these girls at the meet. We found out 3 girls from last year dropped and 3 girls took their place all whom are "friends" with other girls in the troop. They ran in, sat the table and it was like they were always in the troop. I watched as all the other girls chatted away, and mingled, and my DD sat there quietly, at the end of the table, noone talking to her, just staring at me. I felt so bad, I sort of wanted to say, "Let's just leave." The girl who she couldn't wait to see pretty much ignored her the entire time talking to her other friend, and I would see my DD try to say a word to her every so often. Literally the hour consisted of 30 minutes of snack time, yes 30 minutes then 30 minutes of coloring. My daughter can do this in her living room with her sister. I mean, I wasn't around long enough last year to see if the whole year was run like this, but the few meets we did attend, with the exception of 1, it was ran that way.

So I asked her afterwards if she likes Brownies and said we don't have to come back if she doesn't want and she responded very quickly that she "really likes it." So do I the parent go by what she says, or her behavior? Next meeting I will be hit up for dues galore and already got fund raising to do. So rather not waste money..


What would you do?

[Meemur]

Since money is an issue, I'd suggest passing on that activity.

I thought Girl Scouts was lame, as well. Brownies was fun because it was run by our youth pastor's wife who knew how to make everything fun, but then they moved away and the lady who took over didn't really know what she was doing, and then the snotty girls joined, so I called it quits. It was the right decision because the troop dissolved soon after.

[North Beach Person]

My youngest son was like that with Cub Scouts. It became "school". The leaders had the kids doing Math and spelling worksheets at den meetings. Totally unlike what his older brother experienced in Scouts.

[PriscillaVanilla]

Troops can be cliquish. They are run by volunteers and a lot is expected of them by the parents. I would say, volunteer to make it more worthwhile for your child. Get involved, offer to help out at meetings. It might change things.

[Jimmyp25]

We lasted about 2 weeks in Cub scouts and that was it. We got the hell out of there.

[tottsieanna]

I believe a troop is as good as the leaders. My daughter enjoyed being in brownies the first year, then had a new leader the following year. She hated it. They did nothing so she ended up quitting and so did a bunch of other little girls.

Maybe you can talk to the leader and find out what kind of activities she has planned for the girls, maybe if there projects that require them to work together , your daughter and the other girls will get to know each other better.

[Irish Eyes]

Can you find another troop? Women who refer to themselves as "the originals" are never going to accept you and they're going to think it's cute that their kids exclude yours. If you can't find another troop immediately I'd try to stick it out since she said she wants to keep going, but if they keep acting like that I would point out that that behavior is exactly what she's been taught NOT to do and that she shouldn't let people treat her that way.

I'm not thrilled with my son's Cub Scout troop either. They don't exclude him, but they don't meet regularly either and the behavior tolerated at the meetings is not what we signed him up for. If it was up to my husband he would pull him out, but my son said he loves it.

People love to say things like, shut up if you're not volunteering. But these cliques don't want volunteers. It isn't about many hands making light work, it's about them wanting to be surrounded by their friends and they have no intention of letting someone else in.

[Rudy53420]

Originally Posted by tottsieanna

I believe a troop is as good as the leaders.

Agreed. My daughter joined the GS last year and her troop had a few meetings and went on one trip and that was it....just felt used to sell cookies. We had to purchase or sell all the extra boxes they ordered as well.

[Sassybluesy]

First, I would ask your daughter what it is exactly that she loves about her GS troop. Because MAYBE what she loves about it, can be found somewhere else. Maybe she just likes having an activity to go to, and a soccer team would make her happy...or piano lessons...or 4H or something.


If she likes GS so much, maybe it's just because she gets to see her friend. So maybe plan a play date or sleep-over just between your daughter and this other little girl.


Just some ideas. But I do think it'd be helpful to know just exactly what it is she loves about this group, first.

[teakboat]

Kids exploited to sell cookies and popcorn is what it boils down to.