Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 11-10-2018, 06:10 PM
 
491 posts, read 324,576 times
Reputation: 607

Advertisements

Does anyone here think their life would have been better without children? Or perhaps would have taken a wholly different direction?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 11-10-2018, 07:55 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
49,932 posts, read 59,935,627 times
Reputation: 98359
No. Not one bit.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-10-2018, 08:54 PM
 
Location: God's Country
5,182 posts, read 5,250,973 times
Reputation: 8689
Quote:
Originally Posted by waffleiron1968 View Post
Does anyone here think their life would have been better without children? Or perhaps would have taken a wholly different direction?

My late wife and I never regretted not being parents even when she contracted dementia and I had to learn how to help her with toileting, changing her diapers, and even inserting urinary catheters.


Not all people are meant to be parents. Wish more folks would realize that reality.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-10-2018, 09:52 PM
 
2,916 posts, read 1,515,322 times
Reputation: 3112
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
No. Not one bit.
I agree. Not a chance.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-10-2018, 09:54 PM
 
6,300 posts, read 4,196,397 times
Reputation: 24791
No. Despite the anguish one brought in adulthood I don’t regret one moment.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-10-2018, 10:00 PM
 
Location: 53179
14,416 posts, read 22,483,779 times
Reputation: 14479
Quote:
Originally Posted by Calvert Hall '62 View Post
My late wife and I never regretted not being parents even when she contracted dementia and I had to learn how to help her with toileting, changing her diapers, and even inserting urinary catheters.


Not all people are meant to be parents. Wish more folks would realize that reality.


I am sorry for being dense. But are you thankful you didn't have children because your wife contacted dementia and you had to care for her like a child?
Or was this a decision you made from the very beginning when you first met?


And what does this have to do with other people not being great parents? I mean, I agree. Many people shouldn't be parents. I'm just confused how you use you and your wife's situation as an example .


Idk. I'm just confused I guess.


By the way, It sounds like you would be a great parent had you decided to go that route.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-11-2018, 07:57 AM
 
Location: God's Country
5,182 posts, read 5,250,973 times
Reputation: 8689
Quote:
Originally Posted by Calvert Hall '62 View Post
My late wife and I never regretted not being parents even when she contracted dementia and I had to learn how to help her with toileting, changing her diapers, and even inserting urinary catheters.


Not all people are meant to be parents. Wish more folks would realize that reality.
Quote:
Originally Posted by glass_of_merlot View Post
[/b]

I am sorry for being dense. But are you thankful you didn't have children because your wife contacted dementia and you had to care for her like a child?
Or was this a decision you made from the very beginning when you first met?


And what does this have to do with other people not being great parents? I mean, I agree. Many people shouldn't be parents. I'm just confused how you use you and your wife's situation as an example .


Idk. I'm just confused I guess.


By the way, It sounds like you would be a great parent had you decided to go that route.

I was conceived when my parents were still kids and yet they were fantastic, sacrificing their wants and needs so that I, and later my brother, always had the best schooling, medical care, etc. They were truly poster children for America's Greatest Generation. I realized early on that I could never measure up to them.


My wife, a sweet soul, but was never "into" kids. She was also pessimistic about the future and the conditions that descendants would likely encounter.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-11-2018, 08:06 AM
 
10,501 posts, read 7,037,424 times
Reputation: 32344
Oh, there were moments. I figured out a few years ago that, had we been childless, we would be retired and anchored somewhere off Fiji. I think most parents, if they were being completely honest, have stared out the window from time to time and wondered what a life would have been like without dependents.



But, no. Glad we made this journey
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-11-2018, 08:41 AM
 
10,225 posts, read 7,583,226 times
Reputation: 23161
Even if someone regrets it, s/he likely wouldn't admit it, since that's not socially acceptable in our society. It would be very insulting to the children, for one thing.

My mother had been an only child who gave birth to five kids. She would never have said she regretted it, but I knew she did. And she was right. She was not the kind of person to have a bunch of kids and raise them well. It wasn't entirely her fault. It was difficult to get good birth control back then. She tried, but the doctor thought she was crazy for not wanting more kids, and recommended therapy. I kid you not.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 11-11-2018, 10:33 AM
 
Location: Central IL
20,726 posts, read 16,368,709 times
Reputation: 50380
I agree with bpollen. Regretful parents would be run out of town and hung by their toenails! And frankly, if you become a parent and regretted it, what are you going to do?

My parents married late, had fertility problems, adopted and then got pregnant with me. I always sensed they married because of few options (my dad might have actually been gay), tried to have kids because that was expected in the '60's...then got double the trouble - two infants within a year of each other!

My mom especially was very cool with not a maternal bone in her body but my dad was a little better - he grew up with 4 siblings and my mom was an only child of a "divorcee". But would my mother say she "regretted it"? Probably not...should she have had kids - probably not! BTW, I'm childfree by choice and knew that I would be when I was a teenager.

OP - you will not get many satisfying or helpful answers by asking the question this way.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top