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If you can't find a legal way to stop visits, do you think your son has the acting skills to tell his father that you are glad he's got him for the weekend or whatever because you have grown up things you are looking forward to doing without him? A trip with the BF or a getaway with girlfriends to a spa, whatever you think would sound plausible.
I am going on the assumption that if your ex thinks you want some kid free time that he will try to make it difficult for you.
Op: Let's discuss your role. The way your post reads is rather odd. Constant use of The son, and The Father. As though you disassociate from both.
Abide by the court order for visitation .
This "child" ,your loving boy deserves parents who see him as a person not a "the son".
Income can be retrieved from state records. The courts have that access.
The "abuse" allegation is not based on county law. It's state and federal charged. I'm baffled why you would mislead readers with that statement that because he is in another county ...he isn't being investigated. Fwiw, I think you are concerned for "the son" and deserve to protect him. You have shared custody...start sharing your concerns thru the courts. Let him show his true colors.
So no one has any suggestions on how to handle this issue with sons father and son not wanting to see his dad?
you may know more than anyone what options you have
but if im in your shoes...… and the kid is actually scared for visitation ……. I would tell sperm donor he is sick...has diarrhea for the next 5 visits....
have your son write down his feeling of seeing his dad on a piece of paper...give it to your lawyer....or social services...
I believe when he's 12 he gets to pick and choose … where he wants to stay ..
if the kid is scared....then id have a talk with the father yes I know a lot of crap in the past but demand a meeting at his place ….or outside the home...
if my kid is scared … if be in that persons face ....id be having my kid talk to my lawyer ....
lawyers ... if they see first hand the kid is scared .....and shaking ... will pull every string their is
you should have taken your son to the er when the paintball incident happened that way the er dr could have filed a report against the father and you would have had reason to stop said visitation then . But since you did not you need to report every time he calls your side of the family bad words . Keep a journal this is important and note every time an incident happens then show it to whoever represents you in court or your attorney . This man (your ex ) sounds dangerous to your son .You need to see if you can get your son an attorney who represents just him and have him petition the court to stop visitation for your sons safety .I cant believe you have let this go on this long . You gotta get pro active for your sons sake if not for yours .
So no one has any suggestions on how to handle this issue with sons father and son not wanting to see his dad?
How often is visitation?
Your son sleeping with a teenager may or may not be an issue. My daughter was supposed to have her own space when she visited her father. Speak to your attorney.
My daughter had pretty much stopped seeing her father when she was that old. He also didn't like driving an hour to meet me 1/2 way.
As for him signing his rights away, not many judges allow that and even if they do, they still make the non custodial parent pay child support.
Op: Let's discuss your role. The way your post reads is rather odd. Constant use of The son, and The Father. As though you disassociate from both.
Abide by the court order for visitation .
This "child" ,your loving boy deserves parents who see him as a person not a "the son".
Income can be retrieved from state records. The courts have that access.
The "abuse" allegation is not based on county law. It's state and federal charged. I'm baffled why you would mislead readers with that statement that because he is in another county ...he isn't being investigated. Fwiw, I think you are concerned for "the son" and deserve to protect him. You have shared custody...start sharing your concerns thru the courts. Let him show his true colors.
I think "county" was a typo. If you read her OP, it states her ex lives in another state.
I don't know what to say but I am so sorry you and your son has to deal with this situation.
For the record, when my son played paintball, bruises were possible (which is why the courts wouldn't count them as abuse). However, my son's friends didn't target him. It must have been so scary for your son!
Hope your son as a positive male role model in your Dad or another adult.
Document everything and check to see if you could go back and get full custody of your son. A lawyer could help you more then anyone on a message board. The dad sounds like he is verbally abusing your son.
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