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My father in law was very unhappy that we stopped having children before having a son. He made a bellowing idiot out of himself about it, when he could have been a happy part of our family, and been included in our daily life. He insisted that I needed to let my husband go so he could marry someone who could "give him sons". My FIL was an old man in poor health. I knew I wouldn't have long to wait for peace and quiet. He disowned my husband but he wasn't good at paperwork or hiring lawyers, and so we still got the money when we got the peace and quiet.
There’s a level of concern parents of sons don’t have, an awareness of your daughter’s physical vulnerability you try to instill without making them timid. From the obvious- always park in a well-lit area, always be aware of your surroundings and who is around you, to learning how to stand up for yourself without escalating the situation, etc.
Then there’s the cultural routines that need to change-you don’t always need to be agreeable or nice, having a boyfriend isn’t the end-all of your existence, having a media-approved body size shouldn’t be a goal.
I can’t tell you how often men/boys feel they have the right to say anything to a young woman minding her own business-from stupid comments about how she should smile to vulgar, under their breath comments on their attractiveness.
Not that boys are immune to being on the receiving end of crappy behavior or don’t need to be aware too. A friend’s son was roofied one night and completely lost 5 hours of his night, his wallet, phone, and had a financial mess to untangle. A family member’s son broke up with a girl who proceed to tell everyone he got her pregnant and forced her to get an abortion. The online harassment forced the school to intervene before it finally calmed down.
It can be dangerous out there. It’s a hard balance to strike between teaching self-advocacy/independence and being safe.
My daughters are older, obviously, but you need to start addressing these issues when they’re young so there’s a foundation to build on.
I have 3 sons and one daughter. I am closer to my daughter’s family than my son’s. It’s not that I don’t have lovely daughters in law, but it is only natural that they are closer to their mothers than me.
The old saying is true, “Your daughter is your daughter for all of your life. Your son is your son til he takes a wife.”
If I had to choose between all girls or all boys, I’d choose girls.
An old friend has a saying..."With a son, you have to worry about ONE p***s. With a daughter, you have to worry about FIFTY p***ses".
I have two daughters, 33 and 27. Neither put us through any "boyfriend" drama...then again they have an overprotective dad and a mom who knows how to do criminal background checks. Oldest has been married for over ten years and has two boys.
DD was happy with two girls. He says it's just as well he didn't have a son, because DH always hated sports.
There’s a level of concern parents of sons don’t have, an awareness of your daughter’s physical vulnerability you try to instill without making them timid. From the obvious- always park in a well-lit area, always be aware of your surroundings and who is around you, to learning how to stand up for yourself without escalating the situation, etc.
Not true, I know I worried as much about those same things for my son as I did for my daughter.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hedgehog_Mom
I have two girls. We're happy with our family.
My father in law was very unhappy that we stopped having children before having a son. He made a bellowing idiot out of himself about it, when he could have been a happy part of our family, and been included in our daily life. He insisted that I needed to let my husband go so he could marry someone who could "give him sons".
Funny considering it's the dad's sperm that determines if the baby will be a boy or girl. I had a family member that was determined he was going to have a son, he gave up after five daughters, lol.
What's it like for a mother to have all daughters and no sons?
I know that you want moms perspective but as a dad, I love my two girls. No boys and that is fine. In fact, I was hoping that the second one would be a girl.
It's the best! Though I'd be happy with any combo of two kids.
I've got one who likes things like dresses and baking but doesn't realise she's the farthest thing from graceful as one can be and one that's fascinated with bugs, is tough as nails, skateboards, but seems to be shaping up as a knock-out beauty. She wouldn't touch a dress if you paid her. Her class is attending the Nutcracker in December and everyone is required to dress up. She told me she wants to rent a tux.
Both of my girls play hockey and can (and do) pin their boy cousins in a wrestling match.
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