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I don’t know whether anyone ever grew up to be a serial killer or psychopath because he became so traumatized when he discovered Santa wasn’t real.
Santa is part of our cultural heritage. Honestly, children should be children. In a few short years the magic of childhood and Santa Claus will vanish and they will begin their introduction to the real world.
Give the kids those few short years away from this reality. It will be the only time in their lives when they will be.
And grown adults citing such nonsense, straight-faced, as the cause for such egregious acts, deserve the ridicule they receive! It's an argument that can't hold water. "You lied to me about Santa Claus so now I'm mentally ill!"
"Well. You very well may be mentally ill (!!!) but it's surely not because you're still upset about Santa Claus."
*gets laughed out of court, suing own parents for damages*
Millions of children grow up believing in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy. I'm pretty sure that the majority of them are fine, and the ones that aren't have nothing to do with allowing for childhood myths.
I say that even though I'm Jewish and never celebrated Christmas. But my parents let us believe and had "Santa" leave a gift for us under a neighbor's tree. I did the same with my own child although he somehow figured it out by the time he was 4. I honestly don't know how, I didn't make a fuss about Santa but I never said anything in front of him about it. And he still enjoyed the magic of it all enough to protect other little kids from finding out by shushing older kids talking about it in front of little ones.
I was 6 when I figured it out and I wasn't traumatized at all.
Now, part of that may have been how we celebrated. We always opened gifts on Christmas Eve - I think that's a German thing to not conflate gifts with the actual day of Christmas. Anyway, it was understood that those gifts were from family and that Santa Claus would come that night and we'd have those in the morning. So there was never any issue that with Santa out of the picture we somehow wouldn't get gifts, it just melded into the reality that all the gifts really came from mom and dad. And I had the big task of NOT telling my sister - it was like I was the big kid now and that was kinda cool too. Once she also figured it out we phased out Christmas morning gifts and just played with everything from the night before - no biggie.
My 9 year old daughter kept asking me if the Easter Bunny was real and she wouldn't let it go. I finally just told her that the Easter Bunny wasn't real. She put it together that had to mean the tooth fairy and Santa couldn't be real either. She was the one the one that I thought would be upset. She shrugged her shoulders and said ok. She in turn told her brother. He didn't believe her at first though he believes her now. He asked me quite a few questions about why parents do the whole Santa thing.
While both my husband and I were raised Catholic, we aren't practicing.
I really think you're putting to much thought into it and he'll stop believing around 4th/5th grade. Other kids will tell him and it's something they will discuss at school. For the time being, let him believe in the magic.
It's a pleasant little myth. Quit overthinking things.
I may well be overthinking things. That said, few have addressed what is probably my biggest concern, and that is undermining the trust between a parent and child.
I loved believing in Santa Claus when I was a kid. When I began to doubt and ask questions (probably around 6), I now think it was because I was ready to hear the truth. I do remember feeling fine about it and I enjoyed being "in the know" while my little sister was still in the Santa club. I don't remember having any concerns about my parents not being truthful with me. They loved seeing their kids have a wonderful time at Christmas and I think I realized when I found out about Santa that they had simply made it possible for us to have fun with make believe.
OP, what was it like for you as a kid when you found out there wasn't really a Santa Claus? Or did your family not include belief in Santa in your holiday season? No judgment either way.
Last edited by CarolinaMoon1; 12-02-2019 at 08:52 PM..
I come from the opposite end of the spectrum. My father strictly forbade me from believing in Santa Claus. Religion wasn't the issue, as my family was Catholic. My Dad was just a mean, drunk SOB, plain and simple. However, being rebellious at a young age, I did believe in Santa. As I grew older, I began to realize that there is a little bit of Santa in all of us.
That point was driven home to me several Christmases ago when I was a patrol officer assigned to Skid Row. I always worked every Christmas Day and on Christmas Eve, after getting off-duty, I'd hit the downtown wholesale district and jam the trunk and back seat of my personal car with as many toys that would fit. While on patrol on Christmas Day, I'd stop by a rescue mission or two and hand out toys to homeless children who wouldn't have gotten anything. One little girl that I gave a doll to asked me if I was Santa Claus. Before I could answer, her mother told her that Santa doesn't always wear a red suit and have a white beard. Sometimes Santa wears a uniform and a badge.
When I was 3, my 6-year-old sister told me the truth about Santa. I didn't have any firm belief, to put it mildly and didn't care about the revelation. Somewhere there's a photo of me at that age, glaring up at a department store Santa, very suspicious.
Then again, maybe it's made me the adult that I am!
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