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Old Yesterday, 06:34 PM
340 posts, read 169,200 times
Reputation: 508


When I had my kid, I took a year off to stay at home. After a year, I worked part-time. My kid is my first priority so I asked my employer for that arrangement. I was prepared to walk away and would find another job if they said no. Luckily, they valued me enough to let me do so. That made me very happy that I was able to be with my kid and didn't have to find another job. Unfortunately, I decided to go back to work full-time when my kid was around 2 since we got a divorce. It was very tough to put my toddler in daycare full-time. It's heartbreaking every time I dropped her off since she would cry and didn't want me to leave.

If you have a solid marriage, and you don't need the money, stay home with your kid until kindergarten, and go back to work part-time while your kid is in school. That way, you can continue working and can still be there for your kid.
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Old Today, 09:59 AM
Location: NYC
14,313 posts, read 9,563,789 times
Reputation: 15948
Originally Posted by LadyMill00 View Post
I'm exhausted from this internal war I have had since becoming a mom (I can't even imagine how exhausted my husband is). When I became a SAHM (something I decided at the last minute before my maternity leave was up), I felt bad about not working so I decided to find a job and return to work. Now, I feel guilty about working and would rather not work so I can spend more time with my toddler. I should add that I am now on my 3rd job since becoming a mom all in an attempt to find the perfect balance.

We don't need my income to support our family. I just want to make a decision and stick with it. Have any moms been in this situation?? What worked for you??
Just think of being a SAHM also increases your family income if your husband's income is over a certain tax bracket.

I think from a financial and family well being standpoint it doesn't pay if your household income is above $100k in most cases and adding another $50k+ doesn't make a lot of financial sense especially when the cost of daycare and your kids well being won't be cost effective.
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Old Today, 10:18 AM
Location: Winterpeg
1,022 posts, read 400,643 times
Reputation: 4309
There are lots of different ideas of what raising a family might look like. If keeping your career progressing is your #1 priority, you need to do what you can to do that. Like someone said earlier, it's impossible for any one person to have/do everything. If you're trying to give yourself permission to be a SAHM, then do that. Either way, pick one and go with it for now. You'll drive yourself nuts dithering. If the perfect job comes along, then you can go for that. Until then, enjoy your little one! You have quite a luxury with your salary not being vital.

For me - I worked part time after my 1 year maternity leave. My job was in the public school system, so I had school holidays and hours. Pretty much the perfect job for a parent, as far as the schedule goes. Obviously my husband brought home most of the bacon, but I added enough money to take some pressure off of him and keep me busy. It was the best of all worlds for the years until my kid graduated high school.

Then I started a new career and worked full time. I'm 8 years in and have the kind of job I was shooting for. Yes, I never got to have the linear career progression through my 30s and 40s, but life isn't always linear. I have never regretted trading that path for being available to my kid while she was growing up.
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