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Why do people feel as if not suicidaly drinking/driving totally excuses their drinking in the first place?
It's still a dangerous blight, that can wreck havoc on an immature body, and society
Most people find it difficult to deny anything they themselves partake in; alcohol use is no exception.
But parents should be willing to cast aside this hypocrisy, and recognize the exceptional danger and responsibility their putting in their children's hands
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Well, I don't feel that every drink taken is a dangerous, havoc-wreaking blight--but I certainly agree about the lethal combination of drinking and driving, and the tragedies that can result of it.
The scariest part about underage drinking is not the ease with which kids can get alcohol, nor is it the damage binging might do to their bodies--though that is indeed very worriesome.
It is the fact that the only way a young person can truly learn judgment is by *being allowed* to make that judgment.
If we flat out forbid EVERYthing, and never let the kids be in an informed position to decide for themselves, it can be difficult for them, out in the world, to weigh consequences and/or cause and effect.
We've never treated underage alcohol use as no big deal, nor have we insisted it will turn our kids' brain to mush...but it's true, one person's wine with dinner can be another person's poisonous and addictive crutch, and finding that middle road is not always easy.
kids are gonna do it because it's cool and they're not supposed to do it. wait until they puke their brains out a few times and they'll probably grow out of it.....at least until they go to college
why do you americans have such a problem with alcohol , did you learn noing from proabistion,im in my 40's but back when i was a teenager it was common for kids to drinks in the pubs at 15, every weekend when we were in our last year at school (15/16) there would be a house party some where. I can't belive you can't drink in the usa untill your 21 , what does every one do for fun untill then. In the uk your supposed to be 18 to drink just lately they are trying to clamp down on underage drinking but all its doing is driving the kids into the parks where they drink far more for their money or worse turning them to drugs. i went to florida on holiday a few years ago and stayed in orlando , i took my then 16 year old son in the bars at night and we got served without a problem.
why are you all so worried about your kids drinking , do they drive their car as well is that the problem ? In the uk ,althou kids regularly drink they normaly get taxis home .
America does not have a problem, the over legislating bible thumpers and advocates for a nanny state are the ones with the problem.
You point out anyone numerous examples all over the world and they either avoid the argument or point out that our kids will have problems, once again showing it is not the alcohol but parental responsibility yet again.
I did a little underage drinking, but all through high school probably never drank more than 3 beers at one time, so never staggering drunk. My parents never knew, I don't think.
Now, as an adult, I'm a social drinker - a glass of wine in the evening or with dinner sometimes, the occassional beer on Saturday afternoon, a mixed drink when eating out with friends, but never drinking to get drunk. Having one month old twins, there's no drinking going on in our house at all, of course, considering one glass of wine would relax me too much to function for those midnight feedings!
So my thoughts on the subject are, how do you raise your children to have a healthy attitude toward alcohol? I've known kids who grew up in homes where any alcohol was considered "devil juice", so then they went nuts once they were in college drinking the "forbidden fruit" and one ended up in rehab. But then many people raised in "dry homes" continue the practice into adulthood. I think alcohol can be a part of a healthy lifestyle, so having them see me drink responsibly (only one drink on occassions) should help them understand how to drink without getting drunk and acting stupid. But that doesn't account for how alcohol affects individuals - we all react differently to it. The people I've known who were complete alcoholics could wake up and drink a bottle of Vodka before noon, whereas my body doesn't desire that and anything beyone about 3 drinks makes me ill. I guess it's a crap shoot no matter what you do. Teach them responsibility and hope they do what's right once they're on their own.
I didn't do a little underage drinking. I did a LOT of underage drinking. I also did some underage drunk driving. Did some passed-out-naked-in-my-bedroom underaged drinking. Did some weird-drunken-card-game underaged drinking. Did some tire-burning-camp-fire underaged drinking. Did some passed-out-out-in-the-back-of-my-dad's-truck underaged drinking. Did some passed-out-out-in-a-bed-with-two-other-kids-having-sex-next-to-me underaged drinking. Yeah...you get the point I'm sure.
My issue was that my parents were hard asses about drinking...esp my dad. They were also hard asses about everything else. So I rebelled against them. I also found drinking to be an effective release from my oppression. The problem was the side effects. I was borderline addicted. I think if I would have dug the hole any deeper I wouldn't have been able to get back out. But I graduated HS 11th in my class and went on to College and graduated with honors....so I wasn't permanently messed up. I just liked to cut loose on the weekends a little too hard.
My kids aren't old enough to really understand drinking yet. But my oldest is getting there. I'm not going to play hard ball with her about it. I know she will at some point go to a party where there will be alcohol (and even drugs). I just want her to not drink to excess like I did. I want her to know that she can call me and I'll come pick her up....and the punishment will be minimal compared to if she drove home drunk (like I used to do). I want her to understand that it is illegal and to understand the consequences of her actions. I want her to understand that she can get a MIP very very easily and that those portable breath tests are very accurate and often indisputable in court.
16 yr old grandson....a car, a girlfriend and a job.....it's probably gonna happen...we have already had the talk and he know's that #1 if he wants a drink...it is there, in the house. #2 if he elects to drink away from the house and operates his car in any form or fashion, it belongs to me.....[I bought it for him and my name continues to rest below his on the title....] he totally understands the philosophy of cause and effect.
I guess I have a different approach than most of what I've seen here. My kids were/are (two grown, two younger) always taught that drinking is for adults, just the same as cussing and kissing etc, from a very young age. Period.
By the time my older two were teens they were well set in understanding that drinking to get drunk is just stupid and idiotic. They had no problem telling friends that they wanted no part in drinking, thank you very much.
My oldest, now 26, never drank any type of alcohol until she was about 23. while she did go through a small partying stage, it soon became apparent to her that drinking alot was definitely stupid and not something she wanted to do. She's now a social drinker.
My second, soon to be 22, had her very first drink on her 21st birthday only because she 'could'. She has no desire to drink any alcohol at all.
I did it when I went off to college, so I was still a teen (17 going on 18) so I'm almost going to assume that my kids may do the same. I wouldn't want them to do it in high school though.
I just hope my kids end up like me....I had plenty of opportunities to drink when I was a teen, tried beer a few times as a teen, and didn't really care for it. I wasn't a drinker when I was underage. One I got past legal drinking age, I acquired a taste for beer, and enjoy drinking good beer as an adult, but never really to the point of drunkenness. I can only hope my kids follow the same path, and if they grow up with the example of me as a responsible drinker, maybe they will also learn to be responsible with alcohol.
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