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but these expenses that you have that you can't currently afford aren't going to magically disappear because you declare bankruptcy. living within a budget applies whether you have $0 debt or $100,000 in debt. if you can't do it now, what's going to change to make you do it after going through bankruptcy? when you need an alternator for $160 after you went through bankruptcy, you'll, be paying for it with a 35% APR credit card.
I understand what you're saying, but here is the reality-after all of our necessities (mortgage/taxes, truck payment, food, utilities, phone bill, gas, student loans, etc...) we are left with $950. That entire $950 goes to minimums on credit cards. If we got rid of the minimums we could bank the $950 every month, build an emergency fund, and take care of things like car repairs and home repairs as they came along.
I understand what you're saying, but here is the reality-after all of our necessities (mortgage/taxes, truck payment, food, utilities, phone bill, gas, student loans, etc...) we are left with $950. That entire $950 goes to minimums on credit cards. If we got rid of the minimums we could bank the $950 every month, build an emergency fund, and take care of things like car repairs and home repairs as they came along.
well, assuming you're really down to the necesseties, and you've called to see about student loan payments and reducing them, and you've looked into lowering your interest rates on your credit cards and possibly consolidating some debt at 0%....then sure..you've exhausted all other options. but i don't know that you've done that.
also, eating ramen and pb&j for a couple months might reduce groceries a bit. just sayin...
Seriously - I'd at least look into credit counseling. Its not going to cost much (or anything!) for an appointment - and they can at least give you an idea what they can do for you.
Maybe, like my case - they could get your rates lowered to the point that paying exactly what you're paying now ($950/month) - everything could be paid off in 4-5 years.
The other thing is - I know when bankruptcy laws tightened a few years ago it became very difficult to get the type of bankruptcy where things just disappeared. (I don't know my bankruptcy types - I know there's chapter 7, chapter 11, and chapter 13(?)>..).
So I thought the only one that really was left was the one where you end up with a payment plan to pay off your debts...
esp. in your case -- sure, you're broke - but you have $950/month to pay on your debts. Why would a judge just allow you to basically say "I don't want to do this anymore!"...
Like I said in an earlier post --- if you said at the end of the month I have 0 for credit cards, and in fact am negative by $1800/month .... well then that's bankruptcy..
But saying, "at the end of the month I have almost $1000, but I hate having to pay the CC's because then I don't have any savings and it sucks.." ... that will be a LOT less sympathetic.
I'm not a lawyer, so maybe my understanding of BK is really wrong - but you don't really sound like a BK case. You sound like a "need to get CCs under control BEFORE it comes to BK case"..
Which is what credit counseling (or doing the work of a credit counselor yourself) is for..
I really wish you well whatever you decide. I guess you need to talke to BK expert to find out if you're a candidate. And if I were you, I'd talk to CC counselor companies (non-profit!!) to find out what they could do for you. If the CC counseling doesn't work out - BK is always still an option. At least there's that.
So if our food budget was $150 (this was 15 years ago, we were in our 20's and there were only the two of us) for the month - then that was it.
When friends/coworkers asked me to lunch, the first thing I'd say was - I'm really sorry, but my husband and I are pretty much broke, and I can't afford to go.
My husband did the same thing. You know what we learned? If people are your friends and want you to come with them - they will buy your lunch, or a cup of coffeee. They knew we were seriously trying to reform our lives and not just trying to be moochers.
Clearly, 4 years (or so) of paying off your debt will not be fun.
I figure that if I tried to sell all of this stuff it might net $3000 if I'm lucky.
Sell that stuff - there's your emergency fund.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Briolat21
But saying, "at the end of the month I have almost $1000, but I hate having to pay the CC's because then I don't have any savings and it sucks.." ... that will be a LOT less sympathetic.
The more I read this thread the more irritated I get, and my intention isn't to get anyone angry with me. It's not directed at anyone in particular, just the notion that if you are irresponsible and overextend yourself you can get your debt discharged. I know everyone's situation is different and jobs can come and go (out of your control) and I believe there ARE times for bankruptcy. (your child has stage IV cancer, you've blown through all your money, can hardly pay for food, etc)
I don't like paying my bills... CC (which is paid off monthly), student loans, mortgage, ins., etc etc etc., but I DO and wouldn't seek a way out of it because of my poor planning. I live my life frugaly, don't assume I'll be getting a raise anytime soon and even plan on losing my job just in case. I wish more people had the same attitude regarding finances... I truly believes it leads to a less stressful life.
Don't give up hope.
Sounds like your marriage is hanging in there and take it from an old married gal in the end that is what matters.
Think hard about this, I know we have very real emotional ties to our homes but if you were to sell it would that be an option?
I think that the home ownership has been oversold to the upcoming generation.
Now I am a home owner but the homes we bought in the past never exceeded a years worth of salary. Cannot do that now....now on an averaged salary of a teacher or a nurse.
I can understand your worry and issues.
Do what you need to keep your family together.
Quote:
Originally Posted by PG2005
The more I read this thread the more irritated I get, and my intention isn't to get anyone angry with me. It's not directed at anyone in particular, just the notion that if you are irresponsible and overextend yourself you can get your debt discharged. I know everyone's situation is different and jobs can come and go (out of your control) and I believe there ARE times for bankruptcy. (your child has stage IV cancer, you've blown through all your money, can hardly pay for food, etc)
I don't like paying my bills... CC (which is paid off monthly), student loans, mortgage, ins., etc etc etc., but I DO and wouldn't seek a way out of it because of my poor planning. I live my life frugaly, don't assume I'll be getting a raise anytime soon and even plan on losing my job just in case. I wish more people had the same attitude regarding finances... I truly believes it leads to a less stressful life.
The more I read this thread the more irritated I get, and my intention isn't to get anyone angry with me. It's not directed at anyone in particular, just the notion that if you are irresponsible and overextend yourself you can get your debt discharged. I know everyone's situation is different and jobs can come and go (out of your control) and I believe there ARE times for bankruptcy. (your child has stage IV cancer, you've blown through all your money, can hardly pay for food, etc)
I don't like paying my bills... CC (which is paid off monthly), student loans, mortgage, ins., etc etc etc., but I DO and wouldn't seek a way out of it because of my poor planning. I live my life frugaly, don't assume I'll be getting a raise anytime soon and even plan on losing my job just in case. I wish more people had the same attitude regarding finances... I truly believes it leads to a less stressful life.
I am looking for some anonymous advice because my wife and I are headed for financial disaster.
I feel your pain my friend.....
There are a lot of good people who have been hosed in the last couple of years due to the economy in general. Job loss and the corresponding unemployment can and will wreak havoc on one's financial situation. Frequently, when a person does manage to find a new job it will pay significantly less than the position they held before, or they will linger for months at a part time job. Any way you slice it, the results are the same, a person ends up having money trouble.....
There are a lot of people here who are riding a moral high horse and will bust your balls for even contemplating bankruptcy. I'm sure you're feeling a lot of frustration and guilt over the situation you're in. Yes, I'm sure that when you have examined your situation, you discovered some of it is your own fault, but I would wager that the root cause is job loss....
No average, decent person takes on debt thinking, "Ha! I'll just default on all of this and declare bankruptcy!" I think most people end up over their heads by using credit cards to make up a budget shortfall. No, this isn't sound financial planning, but when crap happens, you gotta do what you gotta do..... period.......
The point is, this is YOUR situation and YOU have to do what is right for YOU and YOUR family.... To hell with what anybody else says.... They are not the ones in your shoes......
As to how screwed you will be if you declare bankruptcy, I doubt it will be as bad as you think. I know more than a few people who have had to pursue this course of action in the last couple of years. People who are solid reliable types who, five years ago, would not have even imagined the possibility of bankruptcy but got to the point that they were so far behind that their credit was shot anyway.....
So, I guess all I'm trying to say is, hang in there man. I hope it gets better. If you decide you have no other choice than to file, don't lose too much sleep over it. You have to do what's best for you and yours.....
There are a lot of good people who have been hosed in the last couple of years due to the economy in general. Job loss and the corresponding unemployment can and will wreak havoc on one's financial situation. Frequently, when a person does manage to find a new job it will pay significantly less than the position they held before, or they will linger for months at a part time job. Any way you slice it, the results are the same, a person ends up having money trouble.....
There are a lot of people here who are riding a moral high horse and will bust your balls for even contemplating bankruptcy. I'm sure you're feeling a lot of frustration and guilt over the situation you're in. Yes, I'm sure that when you have examined your situation, you discovered some of it is your own fault, but I would wager that the root cause is job loss....
No average, decent person takes on debt thinking, "Ha! I'll just default on all of this and declare bankruptcy!" I think most people end up over their heads by using credit cards to make up a budget shortfall. No, this isn't sound financial planning, but when crap happens, you gotta do what you gotta do..... period.......
The point is, this is YOUR situation and YOU have to do what is right for YOU and YOUR family.... To hell with what anybody else says.... They are not the ones in your shoes......
As to how screwed you will be if you declare bankruptcy, I doubt it will be as bad as you think. I know more than a few people who have had to pursue this course of action in the last couple of years. People who are solid reliable types who, five years ago, would not have even imagined the possibility of bankruptcy but got to the point that they were so far behind that their credit was shot anyway.....
So, I guess all I'm trying to say is, hang in there man. I hope it gets better. If you decide you have no other choice than to file, don't lose too much sleep over it. You have to do what's best for you and yours.....
i'm not riding a moral high horse or busting balls. and i hope that's not how it came across. i think contemplating bankruptcy is fine. he's at a stressful point. but to me, unless there is more information that he hasn't told us...it sounds like he can make his payments and still live...it's just tough. i don't think that's the type of person who should be filing bankruptcy. personal opinion 100%, but to me, if you can pay your debts, you should.
And again -- can you file a bankruptcy where everything gets "wiped away" - when you actually have money to pay??
I don't think you can. I think then you go into the type where you have to pay some type of structured settlement... which then you still have a payment, but you also have the stain of bankruptcy..
I don't think anyone's saying that someone who HAS to / NEEDS to - shouldn't. I think people are just saying that perhaps the OP (while definitely in a SERIOUS fiscal situation ) isn't actually bad enough for bankruptcy at this point and so should examine some alternatives before it gets that bad.
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Don't give up hope.
