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We've all been there at one time another, In debt, owe more than we can afford on credit cards, bit off too much than what we could chew, etc., including myself. But now, I am financially free, after owing about $13,000 in credit card debt. I was able to land a part time job for 2yrs. to help pay it off. as well as sock some $$$ money away in my savings.....Lesson learned with that situation. I more conscious of how they way I spend/save money. Here the deal, my very best friend has hit me up for money. She wants to borrow about $200.00...I really dont want to loan her the money, as I think that she needs to learn financial reponsibility like I did...I let her borrow $140.00 last year and she did pay me back after about a month. But I feel bad about saying no to her as she is my best friend. I just see a lot of my old self in her, as far as the shopping sprees/eating out/vacations/that she tries to take, knowing she can't afford it.....What would you do?
tell her that you just loaned money to your sister (or someone else) and are tapped out at this point. if you can think of a better reason for you not having money on hand, id use that.
No!
Give freely to those you care about. But never a loan.
I agree 100%.
Very best friend needs some help? Fine, help her.
If you're at all apprehensive about where the money might be going offer to pay a bill or two.
"Give me your electric bill..." Then go online and put down the $200 directly.
I wouldn't do it. I was talking about this with my boyfriend, and he said something really profound. I am going to mess it up, but here I go anyway. Every time you don't help someone, it's just another chance for them to help themselves. If you were to help her by loaning her money, she'd only learn to rely on you in case she falls on hard times. She won't learn how to be self-reliant, and it will hinder her own personal growth.
I'm not sure how up front you two are about this stuff, but I'd be honest with her. Tell her that you've had to deal with financial troubles, and you don't want to see her in the same position. She might be a little frustrated at first but eventually, she'll realize that you're coming from the right place. I do with with my best friend, and he does the same with me. Our relationship is a lot stronger, and we've definitely grown.
i recently had a situation where my wife thought her cousin's daughter was going to ask to borrow money (maybe 100-200 bucks). id give her the money, but i dont want to be an ongoing source of cash. that family is likely to have more issues in the future. one thing i thought of was that we could just call it her gift (birthday, christmas, whatever works) and leave it at that. she ended up not asking so we didnt have to follow through with it.
I really dont know where the money will be going....but I do know that she is having some financial difficulty due from overspending on credit cards and trying to take vacations. For instance, I know she struggled to go to Aruba last year, because the $140 i lended her last year went on her power bill. Now she is planning a trip to Puerto Rico in June, as well as trip to Scottsdale in August. Im trying to help her not to be so dependent on credit cards...I must say, when I became debt free, it felt like a ton of bricks had been lifted off of me.....and you begin to see things more clearly.
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