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Anyone who married somebody so selfish probably ignored the signs or didn't get proper premarital counseling. If you are married to somebody selfish who changed suddenly in the middle, you have every right to get out.
I know many young couples who never discuss how bills will be paid before the wedding day. I just don't understand. My boyfriend and I aren't even engaged yet and we have discussed how much we plan on spending on our apartment next year along with many other things.
I guess people can flip, but I have a hard time believing this happens all that often, or that you couldn't see it coming before the wedding. Selfish is selfish.
Anyone who married somebody so selfish probably ignored the signs or didn't get proper premarital counseling. If you are married to somebody selfish who changed suddenly in the middle, you have every right to get out.
I absolutely agree. Before you get married, you should be dating long enough to realize how the other person treats money and what sort of financial goals they have for the future.
Relationships are not strictly 50/50, but they do involve give and take. Sometime times one person has to give more than the other and vice versa (it is a constant ebb and flow). If one person is always taking and walks around with an air of self-entitlement, then that is not a healthy relationship and it is a partly your fault for pursuing a relationship with that type of person and not laying down healthy boundaries.
The OP is spewing a common, albeit incorrect misnomer, meme: only women have entitlement complexes and are selfish. Men can be very entitled and and selfish. It really boils down to the person.
Claiming that selfish and self-entitled women are responsible for the high divorce in this country is putter and utter BS.
However, I hear from MANY males that their spouse likes to use this line all the time. That wouldn't work for me. Why do I have to use my income to pay for rent, bills, food, etc and you can go buy handbags, shoes, etc?
If my wife ever said that to me, she'd be standing in front of a divorce court judge faster than she can say "Louis Viuton" (sp?).
Edited to add: Oops, I just realized I necro-bumped a thread. Oh well. <shrugs>
Last edited by MillennialUrbanist; 01-13-2020 at 10:27 AM..
However, I hear from MANY males that their spouse likes to use this line all the time. That wouldn't work for me. Why do I have to use my income to pay for rent, bills, food, etc and you can go buy handbags, shoes, etc?
No wonder the divorce rate is over 50%. Selfish ******.
Lots of women have incomes too, do you think that no wives work?
There are plenty of men who squander money too, while the wife desperately scrambles to save whatever money she can. While the man buys non-necessary stuff like boats, expensive sporty cars, camera equipment.
Perhaps there are some Incel forums on the internet where you can carry on with this hatred and rant.
Lots of women have incomes too, do you think that no wives work?
There are plenty of men who squander money too, while the wife desperately scrambles to save whatever money she can. While the man buys non-necessary stuff like boats, expensive sporty cars, camera equipment.
I think the OP was talking about wives who do work, but claim their earnings as "theirs", while claiming the husband's earnings as "ours".
Count me out of that category! While I don't live paycheck-to-paycheck, I'm no Warren Buffett. I do watch my spending, so I don't stupidly clean myself out. My idea of a splurge is a $100 concert ticket, along with the usual concert expenses, like beers and Uber. Cars and boats depreciate and break down, but memories of seeing Linkin Park right there in front of you last a lifetime.
Lots of women have incomes too, do you think that no wives work?
There are plenty of men who squander money too, while the wife desperately scrambles to save whatever money she can. While the man buys non-necessary stuff like boats, expensive sporty cars, camera equipment.
Yep. That was my first marriage. And then he was unemployed the last 5 years of the marriage. His credit cards (thank heaven we kept them separate) were for expensive brands of clothing for himself, taking his friends out to eat and drink, the latest electronics, and fishing equipment. My credit cards paid for home repairs and necessities for our son.
I'm sure there are marriages out there where the wife picks up a job a Williams-Sonoma to get the employee discount and spends most of her paycheck there, but most of us have shouldered our share of the "boring" stuff like the mortgage and the car insurance.
In the past wives picked up low paying jobs in order to have discretionary income. If husband managed money, she might have little discretionary money. If she picks up a part time job, she might have money to spend, and she could decide how to spend, or save. In the very old days, women had access to their “egg money.”
If wife has a career, and husband has same, then they may decide to pool money, or that one pays some expenses and the other pays different expenses. But this situation is different from the old way of wife picking up small job simply to have discretionary money.
Each couple needs to work this stuff out for themselves.
If my wife ever said that to me, she'd be standing in front of a divorce court judge faster than she can say "Louis Viuton" (sp?).
Edited to add: Oops, I just realized I necro-bumped a thread. Oh well. <shrugs>
Wow, your single-minded obsession made you dig this dead horse up? What were you searching for?
I thought you were living the fun life, unencumbered?!
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