Culture in Phoenix (Scottsdale: transplants, house, living in)
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This is going to be a very subjective question, and a lot of you will probably disagree with each other. So, preemptively, let me just say to save your snarky replies to myself and to other posters. I just want subjective answers, right or wrong, however you think of them.
SO... here's the question.
I moved from the Midwest to Colorado Springs. The culture shock, at first, seemed non-existent. Far as I could tell, it was a friendly, laid back group of people that weren't much different from those in Chicago. As time has gone on, however, I've noticed just how different the culture is here than it is back home in the Midwest, specifically in the way people communicate and relate to each other. I'll give you some examples.
Back in IL, people are brash. They are blunt, straightforward, and unapologetic. They don't beat around the bush, they don't feel like they have to tell you "just kidding!" after every sarcastic thing they say. They're not afraid to give you [language] because it's understood you'll know they're joking. They're don't default to interpreting outright honesty as rudeness or tactlessness. Here in Colorado, however, I have noticed that people do NOT speak bluntly. They ALWAYS make sure to tell you that they're "just joking" after they mess with you. They don't really give you [language] none of that back-and-forth smack-talk banter between friends. When they do, however, they generally do it with apprehension as though I might be offended, and the whole presentation comes off weak and pointless. You have to try and guess what people are getting at, because they don't want to tell you how it is.
Also back in IL, especially in the workplace, going straight to a higher-up without first addressing the person with whom you have a problem is considered not simply disrespectful, but pariah. If it's known in the workplace that someone defaults to tattling to management, that person tends to create a toxic environment in IL, and invites hostility and workplace ostracism. Meanwhile, here in Colorado, at every job I've had, as well as every job my girlfriend has, tattling to management without first confronting you about something you may never even have identified as an issue is basically the MO for everyone. People will take the slightest misstep to the higher-ups, when the whole thing could have been solved face-to-face, and then afterwords will expect that you will have no reaction and your relationship at work can continue as normal.
Distilled down, I think the easiest way to put it is that people here in Colorado Springs are not direct. They do not say what they think outright, are too concerned with being nice rather than being honest, and have no sense of responsibility to approach you for mistakes first, probably because they seem not to like confrontation. I figure that, Phoenix being a big city, with a lot of Midwestern and Mexican transplants, it would probably not be this way to this degree. People would probably, I would guess, tend to be more brash, more straightforward and more blunt, albeit perhaps not to the degree they are in Chicago.
Is this true of Phoenix in your experiences? Is it untrue? Give me some examples, if you will.
Thanks!
Last edited by observer53; 11-08-2014 at 07:08 PM..
Detroiters have a similar sort of unapologetic bluntness. It's not taken as rude because we know the other side is either kidding or is simply being straightforward. I get where you're coming from. While we have a lot of Midwestern transplants here, people here strike me as more timid and passive aggressive. I do sort of miss the candor of the Rust Belt.
Detroiters have a similar sort of unapologetic bluntness. It's not taken as rude because we know the other side is either kidding or is simply being straightforward. I get where you're coming from. While we have a lot of Midwestern transplants here, people here strike me as more timid and passive aggressive. I do sort of miss the candor of the Rust Belt.
I feel like people from California may also, however, have that same sort of bluntness. The few friends I've had from there have always been that way. Maybe it was just them, that extrapolation is really only antectodal.
It that's the case, though, maybe the huge amount of CA transplants in AZ might provide you with some of that, if you know where to look?
There are HUGE regional differences in the ways that people interact. IMO, this is the biggest reason that people relocate for short periods of time, then go dashing back to their original port of call, never to leave again.
I would agree that people in some of the western states, and definitely the Southwest, are much more reserved. My main house is in Phoenix, I have a house in WI, and work in IL. So I have plenty of exposure to both regions, as well as the east coast (I moved to Phoenix from Virginia). I've lived in numerous states.
The Southwest is a lot more polite in most ways. Chicago and Milwaukee share a lot of the same sarcastic, outgoing, jabbing behaviors. It's one of those regional things that is hard to explain unless immersed in it. The same goes for Phoenix being more reserved. It just is. Southern California is the land of the perpetually offended. Philadelphia is the epicenter of angry people; maybe because it's locked between DC and New York.
In the east or Midwest, it's easy to tell people that they have a problem. They generally just accept that kind of thing and go about either fixing it or ignoring you. In the south, you get the people who are dumb as foxes. Personally, I see Minneapolis as a western city. It's not anything like Detroit, Chicago, or Milwaukee--even though Detroit is unlike the latter two in other ways.
As far as issues with people at work, you have to look at what you wrote:
Quote:
Originally Posted by leavingIL
people here in Colorado Springs are not direct. They do not say what they think outright, are too concerned with being nice rather than being honest, and have no sense of responsibility to approach you for mistakes first, probably because they seem not to like confrontation.
That is most likely your issue, not theirs. You think they're "too" concerned, but that's your outsider's perspective. To them, that's just how they are. It's not abnormal for that area. You may think they have no sense of responsibility, but it's because they are native to the area and you aren't. You can't change them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by leavingIL
I figure that, Phoenix being a big city, with a lot of Midwestern and Mexican transplants, it would probably not be this way to this degree. People would probably, I would guess, tend to be more brash, more straightforward and more blunt, albeit perhaps not to the degree they are in Chicago.
Much more polite and less brash than Chicago, but less easily offended than Californians, IMO. There are a lot of transplants, so there are a lot of different people out in the Valley. While you do have to do a bit more icebreaking than back east (for various reasons), most times people open up quickly. They're just more polite from the start. I don't consider that a bad thing; you might.
That is most likely your issue, not theirs. You think they're "too" concerned, but that's your outsider's perspective. To them, that's just how they are. It's not abnormal for that area. You may think they have no sense of responsibility, but it's because they are native to the area and you aren't. You can't change them.
Yeah, this is probably true. Although, I will say that the "no sense of responsibility" to come to me is not a subjective assessment, it's an objective one. It's not that they have no responsibilities whatsoever, but they feel no duty to come to me to work things out first.
Of course, this may be just as you say, a cultural aspect of the area I couldn't do anything about. But that doesn't make it not true. NOBODY that has thus far gone above my or my girlfriend's heads has come to EITHER of us first to discuss a problem.
I think you will find a mixture here in Phoenix. Since people migrate here from all over and Phoenix is a young city, compared to more established large cities, the "culture" is still evolving. Most people here are friendly and not as in-your-face like the Northeast where I am from, but if you step on their toes (metaphorically speaking), they will most likely say, "ouch" to let you know!
Because Phoenix has many Midwestern (and to a lesser extent Northestern) transplants, I found the culture to resemble those parts of the country. When I first moved to Arizona from Houston, I had a difficult time with the sarcasm and bluntness. I personally didn't care for it, as I would get offended if a joke is at my expense (mainly if I didn't know the person well enough).
For example, I am somewhat overweight, not obese, but it is what genetics has dealt me. Living in Texas, no one ever said a word about my weight. When I first got to Arizona, I had people making comments towards me (bear in mind this was Scottsdale). An obnoxious neighbor always asked me these snide questions, like if I like to go hiking, running, biking, etc. When I told him I enjoy really enjoy spending time in the pool (this was summer), he asked if I swim laps and suggested I should. He was from Minnesota, and that is what I suppose is normal behavior for the Midwest. I was so offended. I had a very similar experience with a realtor from Chicago. It was a culture shock for me to say the least.
With all that being said, Phoenix has people from other places (California and the Pacific Northwest also send many transplants) and I found those people to be a bit more reserved when it came to joking.
Because Phoenix has many Midwestern (and to a lesser extent Northestern) transplants, I found the culture to resemble those parts of the country. When I first moved to Arizona from Houston, I had a difficult time with the sarcasm and bluntness. I personally didn't care for it, as I would get offended if a joke is at my expense (mainly if I didn't know the person well enough).
For example, I am somewhat overweight, not obese, but it is what genetics has dealt me. Living in Texas, no one ever said a word about my weight. When I first got to Arizona, I had people making comments towards me (bear in mind this was Scottsdale). An obnoxious neighbor always asked me these snide questions, like if I like to go hiking, running, biking, etc. When I told him I enjoy really enjoy spending time in the pool (this was summer), he asked if I swim laps and suggested I should. He was from Minnesota, and that is what I suppose is normal behavior for the Midwest. I was so offended. I had a very similar experience with a realtor from Chicago. It was a culture shock for me to say the least.
With all that being said, Phoenix has people from other places (California and the Pacific Northwest also send many transplants) and I found those people to be a bit more reserved when it came to joking.
Yeah, what you're describing might even fit the bill as rude by Midwestern standards... but would CERTAINLY not be out of place back there. That's cool though. Not that you're being made fun of, just that I might hope to be familiar with the culture. I just feel like a cultural outsider here in Colorado and can't wait to get to Phoenix in July. Which I know is the most horrible timing but it's the way the cookie crumbled.
Because Phoenix has many Midwestern (and to a lesser extent Northestern) transplants, I found the culture to resemble those parts of the country. When I first moved to Arizona from Houston, I had a difficult time with the sarcasm and bluntness. I personally didn't care for it, as I would get offended if a joke is at my expense (mainly if I didn't know the person well enough).
For example, I am somewhat overweight, not obese, but it is what genetics has dealt me. Living in Texas, no one ever said a word about my weight. When I first got to Arizona, I had people making comments towards me (bear in mind this was Scottsdale). An obnoxious neighbor always asked me these snide questions, like if I like to go hiking, running, biking, etc. When I told him I enjoy really enjoy spending time in the pool (this was summer), he asked if I swim laps and suggested I should. He was from Minnesota, and that is what I suppose is normal behavior for the Midwest. I was so offended. I had a very similar experience with a realtor from Chicago. It was a culture shock for me to say the least.
With all that being said, Phoenix has people from other places (California and the Pacific Northwest also send many transplants) and I found those people to be a bit more reserved when it came to joking.
I'm sorry you were made fun of. No one should have to deal with that. I don't think that's a cultural thing as much as it is just running into the occasional jerk. With that said, overweight people tend to stand out more here than they do other places. There is a big emphasis on health and active lifestyles here. Everyone back in MI was huge. Here, if I go for a run at 6am I see half my neighbors.
Because Phoenix has many Midwestern (and to a lesser extent Northestern) transplants, I found the culture to resemble those parts of the country. When I first moved to Arizona from Houston, I had a difficult time with the sarcasm and bluntness. I personally didn't care for it, as I would get offended if a joke is at my expense (mainly if I didn't know the person well enough).
For example, I am somewhat overweight, not obese, but it is what genetics has dealt me. Living in Texas, no one ever said a word about my weight. When I first got to Arizona, I had people making comments towards me (bear in mind this was Scottsdale). An obnoxious neighbor always asked me these snide questions, like if I like to go hiking, running, biking, etc. When I told him I enjoy really enjoy spending time in the pool (this was summer), he asked if I swim laps and suggested I should. He was from Minnesota, and that is what I suppose is normal behavior for the Midwest. I was so offended. I had a very similar experience with a realtor from Chicago. It was a culture shock for me to say the least.
With all that being said, Phoenix has people from other places (California and the Pacific Northwest also send many transplants) and I found those people to be a bit more reserved when it came to joking.
Doesn't sound like the neighbor was making fun, unless his tone was sarcastic or snarky...sounds to me like healthy suggestions without being rude about it. They weren't saying hey fatty get some exercise, that would be rude.
And as someone who is always battling keeping my weight in check, I'm going to go out on a limb and say it's a lot more to do with you diet then genetics.
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