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Originally Posted by Redshadowz View Post
What I really mean, is to what extent these things are important.
Take for instance the word "Honor". Men tend to value "honor" above many other attributes, while women, not nearly as much(if at all). Though women do tend to value things like kindness and generosity more than men.
Sure, that's why a lot of men had mistresses. uhm like Bill Clinton.
Men tend to value loyalty more than women. Men tend to value respect more than women. And in my opinion, women tend to value "security" more than men.
Ba ha ha ha, again... Sure, that's why a lot of men had mistresses. Today they don't even try to hide running while their wife is pregnant. Obama's dad comes to mind. His dad's wife was pregnant with child while he was doing Obama's mother.
The relationship between men and each other, tends to be more hierarchical. While the relationship between women is more egalitarian. Men tend to be more straight-forward. While in my opinion, women tend to be less-direct, passive-aggressive, and manipulative.
Yea and I'll bet that any woman that is direct and tells you what she wants is considered a bi*ch
If you pull out any value, or any behavior. It isn't that it is absent in one gender or another, but the value each gender places on them, varies a lot.
Places? Man go to work, woman the slave to man. Is that place you prefer?
Honesty, loyalty, honor, responsibility, respect, etc, are all nearly the same idea, and they are things which men tend to value highly.
Egalitarianism, kindness, generosity, security, etc, are also all connected to each other, and they are things women tend to value highly.
^^^ You're the type of man we woman warn our daughters about.
What did you do get in a time machine in the dark ages? I know there are a few of you left and some men still try to keep one leg stuck back in the dark ages while enjoying the wife's paycheck but they're dying off too. I'd run as far away from men like you as I can get!
Yeah there's no surprise this guy made it to 80 without getting hitched. Every woman ran for the hills.
What did you do get in a time machine in the dark ages? I know there are a few of you left and some men still try to keep one leg stuck back in the dark ages while enjoying the wife's paycheck but they're dying off too. I'd run as far away from men like you as I can get!
Quote:
Originally Posted by petch751
^^^ You're the type of man we woman warn our daughters about.
First, I didn't always feel the way I do now. In fact, I was once quite the opposite of what I am today. I came to my conclusions based on observations of human behavior. Not because of any ill-will towards women.
Understand, I was the youngest child, and I have always been very observant about what is going on around me, especially when it comes to relationships. I saw all the relationships around me fail, over and over and over and over again. After a while, you can pretty much tell if someone's relationship will fail or not, within five minutes of meeting them.
When my sister brings some guy home, you can immediately sense that they have pretty much nothing in common, or that the guy has a bad personality, or whatever, and that sooner or later, it will end. When my friends are dating women, I can tell quickly whether or not they are actually compatible.
Yet, they don't see it for some reason, or they just don't want to see it. And while I want to scream out to them that they are making a mistake. Not only will they not listen, but by saying something, I become the bad guy.
Myself having been raised by a single-mother(and a bunch of sisters); My mother wanted to make sure that I didn't become "one of those guys". That I would be a "good man". That I wouldn't cheat, I wouldn't abuse, that I wouldn't abandon my children. And the old saying, "Don't have sex with anyone unless you want to marry them", was something that was important to me.
I am kind of a romantic when it comes to relationships. I see no point in being with someone who you don't want to be with, forever. I was 28 years old before I finally had sex. And honestly, I wish it had never happened at all.
The girl had been "abused", and had really bad daddy issues. She lived in the apartment below me. And I actually felt sorry for her, I was her confidant, she would come up and watch movies with me. But, she felt like she "needed" a man, I assume because of all her insecurities. And she was constantly "pushing" herself at me. But I didn't love her, and I didn't think I could ever love her. But, I watched her date these garbage men, who just used her, and left her. And I guess I felt like I was supposed to "rescue" her. That, if she just had to be with someone, then if she was with me, at least she would be safe.
So I gave in to her advances, and for a time, I really started to feel like I cared about her, overlooking some of her "quirks". But then, she told me she was pregnant. She turned out to not actually be pregnant(I knew it wasn't possible). I guess she wanted to see how I would react. But by saying that, it made me really think about whether I would actually want to be with her for the rest of my life.
The problem with her was, just like every woman, she simply wasn't trustworthy. She was just too damaged, and she really didn't respect herself, or anyone else. It was never going to last between us. The best thing for me to do, was to just leave.
So I did, I left the state. I was really mad at myself. Or really, I was disgusted with myself, that I had become the kind of person I don't like. That I had made a bad situation even worse. That I "hurt" someone else.
I never understand how people can have sex with someone, and not fall in love with them.
Anyway, I suppose this statement might come off negatively, but, as I've looked around me, I've seen absolutely no one I would ever want to be with. Of all the women I know, all of them are either untrustworthy, gold-diggers, or completely irrational. I would rather be alone.
My only question is, "Was it always this way? And if not, what changed?"
From my personal observations, and the observations of others. It seems as if the quality of women has fallen over time. The question then is "Why?" What changed? Should we "change it back"? Is this "new world" and "new woman" an improvement?
Who has benefited from these changes? Have women benefited? Have children benefited? Have men benefited? And if not, what should we do about it?
My advocacy of patriarchy, is because I think that system was better for everyone, including women. As I said, marriage is a patriarchal institution. When patriarchy dies, so to will marriage. The question is, is the death of marriage a good thing? Many actually believe that marriage is an antiquated and unnecessary institution. That it is stifling, controlling, and oppressive.
I think marriage is the most important institution of all. And without it, we are doomed.
Last edited by Redshadowz; 10-08-2015 at 06:43 PM..
Oh man.. this actually makes everything you said even worse. If you were 85 at least you could blame it on "being a man of a different age"
:vomit:
Why would I blame anything on anything? Isn't truth ageless?
Regardless, it is pointless arguing with you. We have different views on "What is good".
I believe society is becoming "less good", it seems as if you believe society is becoming "more good".
I concern myself with behavior and morality. You concern yourself with maintaining your independence from men. While supporting an increasing dependence on government. You've become terrified of men, but welcoming of big-daddy government.
Why would I blame anything on anything? Isn't truth ageless?
Regardless, it is pointless arguing with you. We have different views on "What is good".
I believe society is becoming "less good", it seems as if you believe society is becoming "more good".
I concern myself with behavior and morality. You concern yourself with maintaining your independence from men. While supporting an increasing dependence on government. You've become terrified of men, but welcoming of big-daddy government.
Brah. You're 35 and still trying to argue with women. It's futile. You know this.
First, I didn't always feel the way I do now. In fact, I was once quite the opposite of what I am today. I came to my conclusions based on observations of human behavior. Not because of any ill-will towards women.
Understand, I was the youngest child, and I have always been very observant about what is going on around me, especially when it comes to relationships. I saw all the relationships around me fail, over and over and over and over again. After a while, you can pretty much tell if someone's relationship will fail or not, within five minutes of meeting them.
I too have been very observant in my younger years and thats the exact reason I chose to get educated and able to support myself. I observed very young that when you depend on someone else they hold power over you. If you marry a bad man and are dependent your life can be hell on earth. No thanks.
No woman wants a yes man nor do they want a tyrant. You should not want that in a women either.
When my sister brings some guy home, you can immediately sense that they have pretty much nothing in common, or that the guy has a bad personality, or whatever, and that sooner or later, it will end. When my friends are dating women, I can tell quickly whether or not they are actually compatible.
Tell your sister to stop wearing the desperate sign on her forehead. Men, no one for that matter, respects desperation.
Yet, they don't see it for some reason, or they just don't want to see it. And while I want to scream out to them that they are making a mistake. Not only will they not listen, but by saying something, I become the bad guy.
Myself having been raised by a single-mother(and a bunch of sisters); My mother wanted to make sure that I didn't become "one of those guys". That I would be a "good man". That I wouldn't cheat, I wouldn't abuse, that I wouldn't abandon my children. And the old saying, "Don't have sex with anyone unless you want to marry them", was something that was important to me.
Why is it that when men are raised by single mothers they end up not respecting woman even when it's the man that took off? Anyone else notice that?
I am kind of a romantic when it comes to relationships. I see no point in being with someone who you don't want to be with, forever. I was 28 years old before I finally had sex. And honestly, I wish it had never happened at all.
Wow, it sounds to me you got burned and now hate women. I've met women who were men haters and neither is attractive. Men and woman need to be respected and if you can't respect the other do yourself and the others a favor, don't date.
The girl had been "abused", and had really bad daddy issues. She lived in the apartment below me. And I actually felt sorry for her, I was her confidant, she would come up and watch movies with me. But, she felt like she "needed" a man, I assume because of all her insecurities. And she was constantly "pushing" herself at me. But I didn't love her, and I didn't think I could ever love her. But, I watched her date these garbage men, who just used her, and left her. And I guess I felt like I was supposed to "rescue" her. That, if she just had to be with someone, then if she was with me, at least she would be safe.
Again, desperate men, desparate women are the least attractive. They tend to attract controllers who can smell desperation a mile away. That never adds up to a good relationship.
So I gave in to her advances, and for a time, I really started to feel like I cared about her, overlooking some of her "quirks". But then, she told me she was pregnant. She turned out to not actually be pregnant(I knew it wasn't possible). I guess she wanted to see how I would react.
^^ manipulative and personal issues... high maintenence. It will get worse especially with age. And nothing is worse, can make life more miserable than a jealous man or woman.
But by saying that, it made me really think about whether I would actually want to be with her for the rest of my life.
The problem with her was, just like every woman, she simply wasn't trustworthy. She was just too damaged, and she really didn't respect herself, or anyone else. It was never going to last between us. The best thing for me to do, was to just leave.
Aha! there it is.
So I did, I left the state. I was really mad at myself. Or really, I was disgusted with myself, that I had become the kind of person I don't like. That I had made a bad situation even worse. That I "hurt" someone else.
Becoming involved with another is a risk and both should have eyes wide open. It will work or it won't. imho no, you saved two people a lot of misery.
I never understand how people can have sex with someone, and not fall in love with them.
Anyway, I suppose this statement might come off negatively, but, as I've looked around me, I've seen absolutely no one I would ever want to be with. Of all the women I know, all of them are either untrustworthy, gold-diggers, or completely irrational. I would rather be alone.
My only question is, "Was it always this way? And if not, what changed?"
From my personal observations, and the observations of others. It seems as if the quality of women has fallen over time. The question then is "Why?" What changed? Should we "change it back"? Is this "new world" and "new woman" an improvement?
If you're a controller then yes it changed. Love is NOT about controlling anyone.
Who has benefited from these changes? Have women benefited? Have children benefited? Have men benefited? And if not, what should we do about it?
EVERYONE BENEFITED. Stop judging every woman on one or a few woman's actions. Maybe you need to change the type of woman you date.
My advocacy of patriarchy, is because I think that system was better for everyone, including women. As I said, marriage is a patriarchal institution. When patriarchy dies, so to will marriage. The question is, is the death of marriage a good thing? Many actually believe that marriage is an antiquated and unnecessary institution. That it is stifling, controlling, and oppressive.
No way. My younger years were in a patriarchy time and it didn't seem that men were happier. They had the stress of providing all financial means for the family. A woman's life wasn't a picnic either.
I think marriage is the most important institution of all. And without it, we are doomed.
I agree. As one friend said after she found her husband cheating on her. Survival (mentally and financially first). No phone calls or communications, it only extends the inevitable and misery, have some fun, rethink life, move on and once you become you again, only then do you have something real to offer another.
Get off the women have a place, there is no joy in that.
The problem with her was, just like every woman, she simply wasn't trustworthy. She was just too damaged, and she really didn't respect herself, or anyone else. It was never going to last between us. The best thing for me to do, was to just leave.
It's not that every woman isn't trustworthy, it's that you are unable to trust.
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