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You mean you’re for men having sexual freedom if you think the Victorian Era is something to which we should aspire. Women were chattel going from the property of their fathers to the property of their husbands. They couldn’t vote or own property. They were expected to be faithful to husbands who weren’t censured for affairs or for beating their wives and children.
I wonder why women aren’t lining up to return to the morality of these “better” times.
No, we should not aspire to go back to that Era. I just saying that there are consequences for sexual freedom, that's all.
Absolutely. I agree. As I've previously said. Over and over, in fact. Men should wear condoms. If a woman asks him to wear a condom, he should put one on. 100% in line with EXACTLY WHAT YOU SAID.
Are we clear on that? Should I write it again and again????
{Seriously ... only on CD do people ARGUE you with while you are AGREEING WITH THEM}
Now .... Biology check: Who gets pregnant? The man or the woman? Any WOMAN who lets a man have sex with her without a condom who does NOT want the responsibility of a baby is an idiot.
She holds all the cards. Period. She is one who will walk away form sex. Not the man.
People rant about how strong and independent women are and how confident and smart they are ... yet ... they are still having sex without condoms??? Why? Why would any women DO that?
If he won't wear one> BUH BYE
Men can and do walk away. Are you suggesting that they’re incapable of controlling themselves? That by virtue of their biology they are physically and psychologically unable to pass on sex? That’s a insulting, old fashioned and highly untrue assumption. Men are able to control their urges and can walk away just like women can.
You like to blame women for not saying no while also infantilizing men as beings without an ounce of sexual self control. It’s hard to insult everyone at the same time. Well done.
No, we should not aspire to go back to that Era. I just saying that there are consequences for sexual freedom, that's all.
I really wonder about the lives of some of the posters here.
Are they living in a horrible 1940s movie where the husband is a mean drunk who beats his pregnant wife and their 10 kids? Do they think that is what will happen if women were more accountable for their own sex lives? Because it really seems like it sometimes./shrug/
It makes all the difference in the world. Divorced men did not have babies with the intent that they would not support them.
So its about intent not actually paying child support?
Or intent not actually taking care of your child?
Do you think unmarried mothers had no intent to physically or financially take care of their baby?
No, we should not aspire to go back to that Era. I just saying that there are consequences for sexual freedom, that's all.
Clearly. No one disputes that. In a perfect world, all men and women would be A. Responsible (on birth control) and B. Lucky (because birth control fails). Since we don’t live in a perfect world, people (both men and women) are sometimes C. Irresponsible and/or D. Unlucky.
What people disagree on is what happens after C or D occur. Everyone thinks A and B are good.
As far as I knew, they do go to prison for not paying child support. I agree that those who fathered children have a responsibility, but I wonder when do we make the mother responsible as well? The dad didn't have relations with an empty room. It would be great if we could stop glorifying single motherhood as some sort of badge to be worn proudly, and it would be great if we didn't use abortion as a birth control method. It would be better if we actually taught people not only to love themselves, but actually like and respect themselves. People who like and respect themselves don't go around having a fling with a different person every other night.
The left rails against teaching abstinence, the right rails against the attitude of people acting like it's nothing more than a free orgy with no consequences - okay, both have their points. But why don't we ever talk about building people up instead of telling them that they are all victims who just can't help themselves based on their lot in life? "Empower"? Yet no one seems to want to actually do that. Their version of "empowerment" is to get mad and scream at people, to claim that all these people are suffering some great travesty, that they are not to blame for their behaviors, etc. That's not empowerment.
BOTH parents (parent by default, not by effort), are responsible for their choices, not just one side. Both of them need to do a better job than they have been. None of them should be held up on some pedestal - "living your best life" because they aren't.
A person cannot properly take care of a kid if the person can't even take care of themselves. Start there.
Minor correction on the bolded - most lefties I know, including myself, only rail against abstinence-ONLY teaching. I personally think everyone should be well-educated on all forms of birth control, and how to properly use each one.
Thanks for the response. Some of this I knew, most of it, I didn't know. I thought black women worked outside the home back in the day, out of financial need, and assumed many were stay at home moms. Interesting to know the background behind some of these things.
As for the bold, it's a bit more than two times higher. These numbers are from the bottom of page 5 and the top of page 6 of
non-Hispanic white (28.4%)
non-Hispanic black (69.4%)
non-Hispanic Asian (11.8%)
Hispanic (52.1%)
But if you look at the poverty rate of black single mothers, this is an issue, don't you think? In that regard, I have no problem with shaming women living in poverty who have multiple babies they cannot afford to have. SJW's are quick to say if these women had access to free birth control this wouldn't be the case, but they have had access to free birth control and this problem hasn't gone away and has barely gone down.
I think this has to do with the culture of poverty (white women also have babies they cannot afford) and based on some of what you've written in your post, black culture may also play a part in this.
Generational poverty impacts everyone. This isn't a matter of 'none of your business' - it's the business of all Americans.
On the blue, I do think poverty rates of single parents is an issue. However, I'm also aware that the culture of "poverty" is not equivalent to black culture in any meaningful way, I agree with you it is poverty culture. All Americans IMO who are poverty stricken have similar behavior/decision patterns. This was very evident when I worked with the public in public housing programs. It cured me of any/all ethnic biases regarding poverty stricken people and how they "act" and I know that poverty stricken whites, blacks, latinos, Asians, etc., that they are VERY similar in their "issues."
First and foremost I think they play a lot of "games" and are content with living off of the government dime. This is a very small segment IMO of our population though. I've mentioned before that I feel that our government should get rid of the Earned Income Tax Credit (EITC). That is the source of all those huge "tax refunds" in the winter that people actually think they are getting "back" when most of them paid no federal taxes at all. I have known man/woman couples who have not gotten married because they don't want to lost that $10k tax refund. If they got married, they would lose that benefit so they just stay as boyfriend/girlfriend.
I used to work in the public sector with public housing programs and it was sad and kind of sickening how many poorer people actually worked less and made less money so they could keep their public housing or Section 8 or qualify for Foodstamps. It is not just black people who do this. You would be amazed at the "games" played by Koreans in public housing programs lol. This group in particular that I worked with were very....I'll say very good at working the system and getting social security disability, food stamps, housing, etc., for elderly immigrants who were parents of pretty well off immigrant children. These seniors had never worked in America before yet their children learned how to abandon them "on paper" so they got a bunch of benefits and they'd take over entire buildings of public housing. So the stereotypes that I see around here in regards to poor blacks are kind of laughable to me because all of the populations in public housing programs (which means they qualify for all other welfare programs) they worked the system something fierce. There is a whole other "culture" that is outside of one's ethnic group IMO and often people mix up heritage cultures with poverty culture.
The whole idea of someone being "ghetto" is funny to me because I grew up in an inner city with a lot of poor white people and they were "more ghetto" than the ghetto black people I knew lol.
But can you name a single piece of legislation that the GOP has proposed in the last 20 years that solely is meant to help America's black community?
I'll wait.
Schools were desegregated in 1954, Affirmative Action in 1961 and the Civil Rights Act passed, in 1964 was signed, what more do you need? More time?
How about taking RESPONSIBILITY for your OWN actions, for ONCE! MANY others of blacks have done it, why can't you?
I'll wait.
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