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This is a topic that is considered highly 'taboo,' so it is hardly ever discussed. However, I'm thinking that this issue is growing so large that it will soon become impossible to ignore. I'm referencing the "new normal" of perpetual loneliness/sexlessness/lack of intimacy among the men of today, especially young men under the age of 30.
The modern world with its abundance of cold technology breeds atomization, which breeds isolation, which breeds a lack of sex, societal interaction, and intimacy among the masses, particularly among young men. Things were already very bad prior to 2020, but the pandemic seems to have accelerated this process greatly. Covid plunged millions of men into desperate loneliness and sexlessness, leading to record levels of what the kids these days call "simping," as well as the explosion of virtual masturbation and virtual intimacy sites such as OnlyScams and others.
I'm seeing increasing evidence that loneliness and sexlessness is becoming the "new normal" for men, and this new generation of young men have it the worst. It's not just fat, repulsive neckbeards who are ending up alone, unsexed, and unloved. Many of these guys are well adjusted, fit, decent looking, financially stable, etc yet can't get so much as a hug or a kiss on the cheek (without paying a hooker, that is). I'm seeing study after study, survey after survey, showing that people are increasingly isolated, sexless, and without a partner.
I'm seeing an increasing number of guys online complaining about not having been on a date for several years, or swiping right on these dating apps and ending up with absolutely nothing, etc. I went to a nightclub with some colleagues for the first time since the Great Lockdown a few weeks ago, and it's astounding just how bad things have gotten in that short amount of time. None of the females seemed to care whatsoever about any of the males there. The guys were little more than barely visible props to them. What the hell is going on?
In many ways, Japan seems to be "ahead of the curve." They started massive "QE" and debt monetization two decades before the US and the EU did. And they're also leading the way in sexlessness and loneliness. The US is basically becoming Japan in many respects. The social phenomenon discussed in this post is already happening in full force over there.
In the near-term future, I see virtual reality being the closest thing many, if not the majority, of young men have to intimacy with a female. "Simping" will only grow more aggressive, the parasite known as OnlyScams will grow ever larger to suck the monetary lifeblood out of these desperate males. Men will be paying through the nose for any semblance of intimacy with a woman, no matter how virtual and illusory. Utterly dystopic.
I want to end this post by asking: what will be the mid to long-term consequences of all this? I cannot say in any detail, but I believe we are heading for an extremely destabilized future. Isolated men with no access to sex, affection, or intimacy, become apathetic, nihilistic, disruptive.... and destructive.
For this to be topic says a lot of what is wrong with the youth of today.
1. Men have to change. Yes, you do have to court the women. You have to stop playing the video games. You have to pretend to like what she likes. You have to have a job. You have to keep the job. You have to clean the house up to the women's standards. You have to stop cheating when you get the opportunity and women have to be safe in relationships.
3. Women have to stop handing out sex without marriage. It causes all sorts of problems but one of them is cutting down womens enticement to date. Not only does it put pressure on her to have sex with a total stranger but it puts women in a vunerable spot where they can be easy pickens for a dangerous killer. When women ended the night at their front door there were less killings. This also allows for easier cheating for irresponsible men.
snip.
Yep about the video games!
Anecdote time but I hear it elsewhere.
My daughter has a friend and they talk while I play taxi. Her friend is probably 50 pounds over weight but will not date her physical peer. She is happy to be part of the harem of a higher ranking male.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leo58
I don’t get how this can be just about young men. Statistically there are more women than men, so for every lonely, sexless male there has to be a lonely, sexless female. I get that in modern society it can be hard to meet others, but again it cuts both ways. You are concerned that “Isolated men with no access to sex, affection, or intimacy, become apathetic, nihilistic, disruptive.... and destructive.” So what do isolated women with no access to sex, affection or intimacy do?
See the harem remark above. I know two high ranking players. Their pull is astounding. One has Wilt Chamberlain high numbers.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Frostnip
snip
I also think the average man isn't super realistic about what the average woman looks like, and many are blind to a pretty large portion of the potential dating pool around them as a result. Might need to adjust some expectations in that department as well if you're realistically going to find someone available and compatible.
I think it goes both ways. Both sexes misjudge what the median looks like.
Lots of people want to date beyond their attractiveness/desirability peer group. Wanting more than you have is human nature.
So you end up with 60-70% of one gender desiring/chasing the top 10% of the opposite gender. It isn't an OR thing, it is definitely a man AND women thing. Both genders do it.
Happiness, satisfaction, etc are increasingly defined by acquiring that which you think you deserve instead of valuing what you have. With mates, houses, possessions, etc....always have to have more because the people on TV and the Internet have more than you, and none of them are better looking than you, and you thus DESERVE what they have.
An additional thing that gets effed up in dating is what about a significant other becomes the value measurement. Think of the spouse like you own a company and you are looking for the first employee that will help guarantee success. Would your job qualifications begin and end at physical appearance and age bracket? Very very doubtful. But that is the lone criterion upon which way too many people base the most important, deterministic voluntary association of their entire life.
Because of that, only 10% of men and women are seen as desirable. It's a warped view of what matters in relationships, and it is self-defeating arithmetic and probability. And the defeat manifests in men AND women figuring being alone is easier than not getting that which they have been conditioned to think they deserve.
From what I read, he rubbed her breasts and butt first, and she seemed ok with that. That's when he decided to take it "further".... but of course, she wasn't having any of it.
Oh that's different.
I think I can understand why the wife wasn't interested.
Get married "buy the cow" and all romance goes out the window. Considering things slow down with familiarity anyway, it is actually more work to keep passions alive than it was before.
This is a topic that is considered highly 'taboo,' so it is hardly ever discussed. However, I'm thinking that this issue is growing so large that it will soon become impossible to ignore. I'm referencing the "new normal" of perpetual loneliness/sexlessness/lack of intimacy among the men of today, especially young men under the age of 30.
The modern world with its abundance of cold technology breeds atomization, which breeds isolation, which breeds a lack of sex, societal interaction, and intimacy among the masses, particularly among young men. Things were already very bad prior to 2020, but the pandemic seems to have accelerated this process greatly. Covid plunged millions of men into desperate loneliness and sexlessness, leading to record levels of what the kids these days call "simping," as well as the explosion of virtual masturbation and virtual intimacy sites such as OnlyScams and others.
I'm seeing increasing evidence that loneliness and sexlessness is becoming the "new normal" for men, and this new generation of young men have it the worst. It's not just fat, repulsive neckbeards who are ending up alone, unsexed, and unloved. Many of these guys are well adjusted, fit, decent looking, financially stable, etc yet can't get so much as a hug or a kiss on the cheek (without paying a hooker, that is). I'm seeing study after study, survey after survey, showing that people are increasingly isolated, sexless, and without a partner.
I'm seeing an increasing number of guys online complaining about not having been on a date for several years, or swiping right on these dating apps and ending up with absolutely nothing, etc. I went to a nightclub with some colleagues for the first time since the Great Lockdown a few weeks ago, and it's astounding just how bad things have gotten in that short amount of time. None of the females seemed to care whatsoever about any of the males there. The guys were little more than barely visible props to them. What the hell is going on?
In many ways, Japan seems to be "ahead of the curve." They started massive "QE" and debt monetization two decades before the US and the EU did. And they're also leading the way in sexlessness and loneliness. The US is basically becoming Japan in many respects. The social phenomenon discussed in this post is already happening in full force over there.
In the near-term future, I see virtual reality being the closest thing many, if not the majority, of young men have to intimacy with a female. "Simping" will only grow more aggressive, the parasite known as OnlyScams will grow ever larger to suck the monetary lifeblood out of these desperate males. Men will be paying through the nose for any semblance of intimacy with a woman, no matter how virtual and illusory. Utterly dystopic.
I want to end this post by asking: what will be the mid to long-term consequences of all this? I cannot say in any detail, but I believe we are heading for an extremely destabilized future. Isolated men with no access to sex, affection, or intimacy, become apathetic, nihilistic, disruptive.... and destructive.
According to a few posters here on CD only 10% of the men get all the women anyway so what's new.
I think your problem is that you comprehend your sense of reality by scouring internet sites in which men complain about being alone while they spend all their time scouring the internet.
If your friends have the same attitude as you I can understand why the women in the bar kept their distance.
For this to be topic says a lot of what is wrong with the youth of today.
Right. This is a perversion masquerading as a social issue. Discussing dating apps and stats on people finding mates is fine but it's a branch side-topic to the OP's post which is really nothing but a restatement of the public case made by Incels who are trying to normalize themselves as victims. Actually it's a whole lot more sanitized than the true picture. Scratch beneath the surface of this sub-fringe cult and you'll find some of the most vile woman-hating narratives coupled with fantasies of violence. Slava Internet for bringing these freaks together and allowing them to self-reinforce, amplify and validate their dysfunction. Don't buy into the pathos of their message. The very idea of entitlement to "access" to women really says it all about how they view the 'objects' that they both desire and hate.
LOL. do you live in Kentucky or something? move somewhere with different people, or find way to meet different people. Yeah health problems can make that harder. Ive got stage 4 cancer, and its certainly slowed down my dating some, but its not a deal breaker for everyone so im sure you can manage. And dying sucks. Because after it you don't get to make any decisions. Or see anything new.
Anyways the topic. Virtual reality gets brought up, and that's a hit and miss. Oddly Ive seen my teen meet other local teens and chat with them in VR, and also meet in real life. But also meeting a larger variety of people as well. I dunno if it will make things different. But I also remember people telling me I was not going to grow up OK because I spent too much time reading books. Yeah. I was 4 years old when picasso died. Im that old. Then computers. and the atari 2600 at home for peers. video games were going to destroy us all. Same argument as the OP. Yeah no.
Were still a LONG LONG way from meeting some pretty basic needs this way, so I assure ya, we're all gonna keep meeting in person.
No, it's not fixable and it's not going to get better. I have been getting worse. I have multiple problems and I am unlikely to see 50. I am actually surprised that I am still alive. I have nearly died several times. I am not even allowed pain meds thanks to the drug junkies and the government.
Around here that is what is available. The decent men are all unavailable.
I never got to have milestones when I was young like most girls. I was raped when I was a child and married off to the thing because of Bible scripture that if a man forced himself on an unbetrothed virgin that he was to marry her. I never chose to be with him. I had my future stolen. Then I got to live my adult life being constantly falsely accused of choosing this. I wasn't allowed to have a choice.
Part of me looks forward to dying. It will be nice to escape this body. But I know that God never had anything good for me so I will not like where I end up.
I'm sorry to hear that. There's no doubt that religions have some pretty backward teachings hidden behind this guise of holiness, just like the left's new woke culture. This is why I say it's not about right/left for me, it's about human nature.
My life hasn't been the best either at least until the last year or so. I consider it a learning experience if I have to incarnate back here, it's the tough lives where a person grows the most. Yes normies will make fun of people who they perceive to be lower social status... it's part of the game incarnating among a primitive animal species. It's not easy. Life's not easy. Is it worth it? Well I'm here, might as well make the best of it.
Spoken like a person who doesn't know what they're talking about.
Unlike you, I've actually traveled the world, so yes I do have a good idea of what a lot women really want. And it all comes down to one thing: financial security
If you don't have it, you better be tall, funny, handsome, and fit. If you do have it, you could be bald, fat, short, ugly, and still have plenty of women. It also depends on what country you live in. A fat ugly old broke man could have a good time in Brazil, Thailand Colombia, while struggling to date even 1 woman in Western Europe or America.
Life is about taking lemons and making lemonade, a passport if your lemonade. Being lonely and single is a choice, America has the most powerful passport on the planet.
Stop whining and start booking some flights.
Everyone has to bring something to the table, otherwise what's the point of being in a relationship. In the dating market free market laws of supply and demand apply... if there's an excess of males they will have to try harder. They will have to try harder for no other reason that women literally are genetically wired to want to share an alpha male over having a beta male to themselves. They really at the very least want a man who is confident and can take charge. In the end personality matters more than looks or money. That's not to say you can't attract women with money, but are they really going to be into you for you then? A lot of men don't care I guess, but I'm not going to bother with a woman unless she's really into me.
I wouldn't want to import women because I like my life in South Dakota and dislike densely populated areas, pop culture indoctrinated people who expect this life of chasing material goods and experiences. I want a loyal housewife who is simply happy to have a responsible man around who is clean and can take care of his affairs around the house, even if I lack "game" and "small talk" skills and don't like to gossip about half the town like all my co-workers do.
For women used to densely populated urban centers, I wouldn't want to try to acclimate them to South Dakota. Nonetheless the doors for me are opening as I better myself and personality. I can see it in the way women look at me, but I'm still quite shy. I generally do not break the ice. If they don't initiate they have to find someone else. I might change that policy this year, I might not. We'll see.
According to a few posters here on CD only 10% of the men get all the women anyway so what's new.
I think your problem is that you comprehend your sense of reality by scouring internet sites in which men complain about being alone while they spend all their time scouring the internet.
If your friends have the same attitude as you I can understand why the women in the bar kept their distance.
I dont think they (or most people) are saying that. The top 10% (Id say 20%) get a much larger interest.
Both sexes seem to suffer from not understanding what the median actually looks like and both seem to try to punch above their fighting weight. This is a forever thing that seems greatly increased now. Probably in part because of things like Tinder.
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