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It's okay in my book, but I'm sure many would disagree with me.
There is a concept called "linguistic privilege". We use some words and phrases around certain groups that we wouldn't use around others. For instance, a group of girls might refer to each other as "*******", but they know that no harm is intended. If a guy calls one of them a "b*tch", however, that can be quite a different thing.
If you're not que er, I would be careful throwing around that word unless you're sure that the person you're speaking to is okay with it.
(You can call me qu eer, ugga. I know you're cool. )
I just had a conversation w/my best friend about this. He has no problem w/the "f" word, I however do. I would never say it, could never say it. I feel the same way about the "n" word in relation to black people. I just feel that they have negative connotations. In response to the "*****" word, I had to laugh about that because once in a VERY great while, I'll call my friend a *****, in jest of course. This hardly ever happens & we know that when we say it, it's just in a friendly jabbing kind of way. But yeah, if a guy said that to me, unless it was in the exactly same friendly jabbing kind of way, I would have a problem w/it.
Yeah , I see you're point, I stopped walking down the broadwalk in florida with my coworker, while he was eating an ice cream cone, because it seemed like people were getting the idea we were a couple.
Yeah, yeah... I bet you hug a guy with more distance than you hug a girl. Everyone knows about the "guy hug". The reason it's done? You're worried that people will think you're a homo if you hug a guy too closely.
I'm not criticizing you. I'm just pointing out examples of homophobia. These are cases where the word really is accurate. They indicate a fear of homosexuality.
Well then what about a gay guy who has traditionally masculine characteristics and interests. Would you believe that he's not really gay? That would have to be the logical conclusion if you believe that straight guys can't like poetry, listen to show tunes, or like the color pink.
I agree, do you remember back in the day on Geraldo when he had that dad & 2 daughters who were completely prejudiced against Jews? An actual fight broke out on the stage. Those girls were taught their hatred by their dad. However, there are also times when people don't grow up w/the hatred, they start to hate because of some negative experience.
I do remember that Geraldo incident, and I do agree with you that hate is not always taught. I guess I should have said that no one is born with hatred.
In response to the "*****" word, I had to laugh about that because once in a VERY great while, I'll call my friend a *****, in jest of course. This hardly ever happens & we know that when we say it, it's just in a friendly jabbing kind of way. But yeah, if a guy said that to me, unless it was in the exactly same friendly jabbing kind of way, I would have a problem w/it.
You would probably need to know the guy and know that he's joking.
Language and communication is more complicated than a lot of people realize. Just because we're okay with some peple calling us a certain word doesn't mean we're okay with the whole world calling us by that word.
I do remember that Geraldo incident, and I do agree with you that hate is not always taught. I guess I should have said that no one is born with hatred.
Yeah, yeah... I bet you hug a guy with more distance than you hug a girl. Everyone knows about the "guy hug". The reason it's done? You're worried that people will think you're a homo if you hug a guy too closely.
I'm not criticizing you. I'm just pointing out examples of homophobia. These are cases where the word really is accurate. They indicate a fear of homosexuality.
Actually I am avery outgoing bear hugger, I have male friends who I love dearly and dont have a problem giving them a hug. Guess I'm just secure in my masculinity!
You would probably need to know the guy and know that he's joking.
Language and communication is more complicated than a lot of people realize. Just because we're okay with some peple calling us a certain word doesn't mean we're okay with the whole world calling us by that word.
Exactly. My same friend I mentioned told me a couple weeks ago that he just had his first discrimination episode. I of course asked what it was, & he told me that he was walking to his car after leaving a gay bar & a car drove by w/a girl & a guy & the girl for no reason whatsoever yelled the "f" out of her window to him. He wanted to yell something back but then was afraid they would turn around & come after him. I was sad when he told me that because A. he's my best friend & B. he did nothing to provoke it, it just came out of nowhere. I listened to his story & the rage just starting boiling, I wish I would've been there because that car definitely would've gotten a piece of my mind. And, I'm sure the cops would've been called.
Well then what about a gay guy who has traditionally masculine characteristics and interests. Would you believe that he's not really gay? That would have to be the logical conclusion if you believe that straight guys can't like poetry, listen to show tunes, or like the color pink.
Why would I even ponder it, if he didnt appear or act like it.
It's okay in my book, but I'm sure many would disagree with me.
There is a concept called "linguistic privilege". We use some words and phrases around certain groups that we wouldn't use around others. For instance, a group of girls might refer to each other as "*******", but they know that no harm is intended. If a guy calls one of them a "b*tch", however, that can be quite a different thing.
If you're not que er, I would be careful throwing around that word unless you're sure that the person you're speaking to is okay with it.
(You can call me qu eer, ugga. I know you're cool. )
hey, thanks
i don't buy the whole 'linguistic privlege' deal. either a word is acceptable, or it isn't.
but no, i don't plan on throwing it around at anyone.
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