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Back in 1995 I was stationed on board the USS LaSalle AGF-3, homeported in Gaeta, Italy. One night in Gaeta I dared an Irish bartender to make every drink he knew how to make. Yes, I was already lit when I asked him this. Don't know how I got back to the ship, don't know how I managed to walk across the quarterdeck and back to my rack, and I don't know what happened to my left shoe. But for two hours the next morning I was hugging a toilet that over a hundred men had already used. I gave up drinking that morning.
If you really want to get wasted, travel to eastern Europe for some homemade vodka. We had some in Odessa, Ukraine. So strong that one of our guys woke up married. He left the wedding band on the night stand and ran back to the ship. One guy woke the next morning in his own rack but wearing women's Mickey Mouse panties (our ship had women). The rest of his clothes were in the women's berthing compartment. We asked him if he got lucky and he said he didn't remember.
Holy cr@p. It's not like my drink has an umbrella on top or that I'm mixing fruit juice with my cocktail. It's smirnoff with a twist of pear, 'cause plain smirnoff straight up sucks the big one.
*Laffin'*
Ok, well if it doesn't have an umbrella or one one those twisty straws I guess it's alright.
Back in 1995 I was stationed on board the USS LaSalle AGF-3, homeported in Gaeta, Italy. One night in Gaeta I dared an Irish bartender to make every drink he knew how to make. Yes, I was already lit when I asked him this. Don't know how I got back to the ship, don't know how I managed to walk across the quarterdeck and back to my rack, and I don't know what happened to my left shoe. But for two hours the next morning I was hugging a toilet that over a hundred men had already used. I gave up drinking that morning.
If you really want to get wasted, travel to eastern Europe for some homemade vodka. We had some in Odessa, Ukraine. So strong that one of our guys woke up married. He left the wedding band on the night stand and ran back to the ship. One guy woke the next morning in his own rack but wearing women's Mickey Mouse panties (our ship had women). The rest of his clothes were in the women's berthing compartment. We asked him if he got lucky and he said he didn't remember.
Skater. And yes, I know your ship had women that's why you're a skater . (Squid inside joke) HA, jk.
We have friends from Hungary and every Christmas we share their families homemade pear liqueur. Oh maaaaan.
Skater. And yes, I know your ship had women that's why you're a skater . (Squid inside joke) HA, jk.
We have friends from Hungary and every Christmas we share their families homemade pear liqueur. Oh maaaaan.
Ok, well if it doesn't have an umbrella or one one those twisty straws I guess it's alright.
How to make a girly drink more manly?
Replace frilly umbrella with favorite football team's football helmet.
replace tiny stir straw with a small baseball bat or hockey stick
put girly mixed drink in a man size frosted mug or a beer stein
put pretty red drinks in mug shaped like a skull.
and if someone calls you out on the type of booze you're drinking, look them right in the eye and say, "I lost a bet".
How to make a girly drink more manly?
Replace frilly umbrella with favorite football team's football helmet.
replace tiny stir straw with a small baseball bat or hockey stick
put girly mixed drink in a man size frosted mug or a beer stein
put pretty red drinks in mug shaped like a skull.
and if someone calls you out on the type of booze you're drinking, look them right in the eye and say, "I lost a bet".
Many of these drinks are served cold or over ice. Wangs are subject to shrinkage and that takes away the "manly" look. I have stirred my coffee with such things as a flat tip screwdriver, oil dipstick, ink pen, and other items. The oil helped to improve the flavor of Navy coffee.
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