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The ladies at my church gave me a nice shower last month and held it at 7 p.m. on a Monday evening at our church mulipurpose room. They served fingerfoods (veggies and dip, cheese and crackers, cake and cookies, etc.) and punch. Everyone had eaten dinner beforehand so the amount of food was perfect.
That would be my dinner - lots of people don't eat dinner at 5:30 or 6:00!
What do y'all think of showers thrown out in the boonies? Say a friend just bought a house 40 minutes out of town and offers to host, will the prospective guests consider that too far to drive?
I know this is an old zombie thread, but I have to chime in here.
The link you mentioned had no advice whatever for couples who don't have someone else host their baby shower.
I know it's done in some areas/communities where the mother hosts her own shower, but in most communities that is a REALLY serious etiquette breach. This seems to be happening mostly in cases where the mother is young, single, and truly needs help with expenses that their family is unwilling or unable to provide, so in desperation she hosts her own shower.
A baby shower should be hosted by a friend, or a group of friends, or family who are not in the direct "line" of the mother - that is, no grandmas or great grandmas should host.
Baby showers are often hosted by several hosts, making it a really fun thing all around and not too much burden on any one host.
Oh wow! I had no idea grandmothers shouldn't host as etiquette! No wonder my mom wasn't stepping up to the plate.
My fiance and I have put the wedding plans temporarily on hold while we work on resolving a few issues, but baby is on the way and cannot wait for said issues to be straightened out.
I was fortunate enough to have a couple of friends step up to host my baby shower and I'll be covering some of the costs myself as I want to host in an event hall in my apartment..I'm not sure if this is a breach of etiquette. But so is the whole event since I'm already single with a fiance currently residing in Germany until January when he obtains his European citizenship.
Oh wow! I had no idea grandmothers shouldn't host as etiquette! No wonder my mom wasn't stepping up to the plate.
My fiance and I have put the wedding plans temporarily on hold while we work on resolving a few issues, but baby is on the way and cannot wait for said issues to be straightened out.
I was fortunate enough to have a couple of friends step up to host my baby shower and I'll be covering some of the costs myself as I want to host in an event hall in my apartment..I'm not sure if this is a breach of etiquette. But so is the whole event since I'm already single with a fiance currently residing in Germany until January when he obtains his European citizenship.
In my friend group, we host wedding and baby showers for each other’s kids (all the kids are friends as well). I cohosted 3 baby showers before it was my daughters turn to be celebrated. So no, the grandmother shouldn’t give showers, it if she’s lucky she has great friends who will!
Yes, old thread. Love your info on the etiquette breach. When you think about it, even in the best of circumstances, the baby shower can be a bit of a gift grab. Let's not make it more of one. It should be hosted by loving girlfriends.
The best breach I've seen is when the mother to be passed out envelopes so we could all address our own thank you notes.
The best breach I've seen is when the mother to be passed out envelopes so we could all address our own thank you notes.
I was surprised when that happened at a baby shower that I attended, too. But, I asked some of my younger friends/relatives and they said that it happened quite often at showers today. At least the mother-to-be sent me a very nice thank you note for my gift.
4 of my DD's friends went together and hosted her baby shower. It was held in an activity room in the church of one of the hostesses. The hostesses and a couple of their mother's actually cooked the food (lasagne, meatballs, salad, bread and cake) and my daughter made a fruit salad which was put into a watermelon that we cut into a dinosaur shape. The hostesses cleaned up afterwards. Even though I didn't host it, I do papercrafts so I did volunteer to make the invites and favors as well as the thank you cards.
It was all very reasonably priced and everyone had fun, which was the main idea.....other than gifts. Frankly I don't worry too horribly much about the "rules", just have fun.
I was surprised when that happened at a baby shower that I attended, too. But, I asked some of my younger friends/relatives and they said that it happened quite often at showers today. At least the mother-to-be sent me a very nice thank you note for my gift.
Since so much correspondence between younger people seems to be electronic these days, the Mother and Father To Be may not have the mailing addresses of their friends.
My wife and I hosted a Baby Shower for our Daughter-in-Law last weekend at a Hotel/Restaurant complex. (Slightly odd as I seem to remember the Grandmothers-to-Be as second-tier honorees at Baby Showers in the decades past rather than being the planning host.)
Regardless, approximately 40 invitees, almost exclusively couples, and 35 or so attended. We paid the bill.
In my friend group, we host wedding and baby showers for each other’s kids (all the kids are friends as well). I cohosted 3 baby showers before it was my daughters turn to be celebrated. So no, the grandmother shouldn’t give showers, it if she’s lucky she has great friends who will!
I wasn't aware that the Grandma's to be shouldn't host the baby shower... I hosted my daughters shower.
Our Pizza Parlour had a 'party room' that they let people use (you have to ask for it for a certain day/time - its not just walk in and use). It was great!
I ordered 8 extra large pizzas (a variety) and then set up a 'tab' for the salad bar. They brought in pitchers of all different kinds of soda and juice (and water) and cups and plates. It had a TV on playing music and a little private bathroom. There were about 8 long tables and chairs and my sons wife and I went in early and decorated (with Dollartree table clothes and streamers and balloons).
I had ordered a cake from Safeway which I brought in with me.
On the invitations I stated that food/non alcoholic drinks and cake would be provided but guests were responsible for their own alcoholic drinks.
We had so much fun!! We were there about 4 hours...played games, opened gifts, and visited. At the end, the pizza manager came and gave us big huge garbage bags and all we had to do was scoop everything into the bags and he took them out for us!
It wasn't very expensive at all... off the top of my head it ran me about $200 including everything.
We had about 30 guests
Easy, Peasy - no fuss, no muss
Last edited by kaceyellis; 04-05-2020 at 09:40 AM..
Reason: to correct
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