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Old 09-20-2014, 09:35 PM
 
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As I've gotten older, I have developed a pretty good ability to read people and their attitudes. For example, I can spot fake a mile away. It isn't hard to pick up in speech patterns and other things can give it away, like an exaggerated smile or laugh. Also, if someone doesn't like me, it isn't hard to tell. Lack of eye contact, awkward and forced feedback in a conversation, thinly veiled insults, etc. On the other hand, I can pick up on good chemistry very easily as well if the person looks me in the eye while talking and carries on a good, smooth conversation that we are both interested in.
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Old 09-20-2014, 09:51 PM
 
Location: NW AR
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Fortunately and unfortunately, yes. It has nothing to do with age though or how people present themselves for your opinion on how you think they don't or do like you. That's not it. People are not perfect. You have to see their imperfections as well as their perfections. The two aren't separate and I see both.
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Old 09-21-2014, 11:29 AM
 
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Absolutely. I've read a lot of books on behavioral science and body language, because I find the topic fascinating and I definitely think I've become a good reader of people. One trend I've noticed amongst con artists and liars is they talk too much. They supply unnecessary details, go off on tangents and try to turn things back around on the person who's questioning their sincerity. It's a dead giveaway. Also people who try to become too familiar with you too quickly or use the word "we" constantly are usually full of crap.

If you're interested in this sort of thing, read "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin de Becker. It's an amazing book.
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Old 09-21-2014, 04:26 PM
 
Location: Gods country
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The one thing that I won't tolerate in people is when they don't know how to listen. I will give them a pass if I think that they are nervous. But after a couple times trying to get a word in edgewise I just walk away.
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Old 09-21-2014, 04:39 PM
 
Location: California
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I've been able to spot a BS'er my whole life.
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Old 09-21-2014, 06:00 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by statisticsnerd View Post
As I've gotten older, I have developed a pretty good ability to read people and their attitudes. For example, I can spot fake a mile away. It isn't hard to pick up in speech patterns and other things can give it away, like an exaggerated smile or laugh. Also, if someone doesn't like me, it isn't hard to tell. Lack of eye contact, awkward and forced feedback in a conversation, thinly veiled insults, etc. On the other hand, I can pick up on good chemistry very easily as well if the person looks me in the eye while talking and carries on a good, smooth conversation that we are both interested in.
None of that sounds like "reading people". You're just observing the obvious. Fakeness, exaggerated smiles/laughs, thinly-veiled insults, etc are all easy to detect. Reading someone would be more along the lines of getting a negative vibe from a person when it's not obvious. For example, one day this woman I know introduced me to the man she had just recently starting dating. Just from being around him a few times, I got the strange feeling that he was an alcoholic. Some time later, I found out (through someone else) that the man indeed had had past issues with alcohol.
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Old 09-21-2014, 06:37 PM
 
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I had a coworker that I thought was a little difficult to read. I decided to "test" her one day by striking up a casual conversation. Although she replied to me, and did make direct eye contact, her words were more "closed" in that her responses were not unfriendly, but brief. My read of her told me that although she was social, she was picky/choosy of with whom. Not that she disliked me, but I was not high on her hit parade.
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Old 09-21-2014, 06:58 PM
 
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Sometimes I read people well and sometimes not so much. I think some other people are more perceptive in that department than I am. I am better at it as I get older, but that is probably just due to more experience of meeting and dealing with many types of people over the years.

When you find those online tests of accurately reading someone's mood by their facial expressions, take some of the tests and see for yourself. I have a few times and I tend not to do so well with those.
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Old 09-22-2014, 08:27 AM
 
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Read Blink by Malcom Gladwell. Great book about reading micro expressions and snap judgments.
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Old 09-22-2014, 12:09 PM
 
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Yes extremely and it's often a curse like last week. I knew I failed the interview just by looking at the interviewer and I think it made me all the more nervous.
I don't like doing it sometimes because I'll do it without meaning to like with my gay dar. I don't know how to turn it off.

I would say though that often I'm more good at reading people if I care to so if my gay dar goes off randomly it's more likely to be wrong than reading a celeb I admire.

The worst part is because I know that since I'm human there is that chance I am wrong so I don't always listen to myself. My ex had an ugly face for a reason (he was/is ugly on the inside) but I never thought anything of it. Even when the signs of him being bad news became more clear, I still decided to give him a chance
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