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Maybe the first step is to acknowledge the problem?
I have a hair trigger that has bothered me for the last ten years. It has become a personality flaw and I want to get rid of it. I know where and when it started and when it got worst.
It started when I was a customer of Sprint cellular service and I decided that their prices and services were so bad so I would cancel.
When I called customer service and told the guy on the phone I wanted to cancel, he started asking questions as to why. After two or three questions, I just said, "Look, I'm not here to answer questions, I just want to cancel the service." From there, every response he gave to anything I said was "Why do you want to cancel." I spent about 5 minutes "arguing" with this jerk and then asked to speak to a supervisor and he refused. (At the time, I did not recognize this jerk as a customer service version of a troll.) His refusal to connect me with a supervisor made me livid and since that incident I have always had a problem with customer service people who ask questions instead of just doing as I ask.
The problem got worse, when I was driving 3500 miles and found after my 3rd or 4th fill-up of the day that my credit/debit card had been frozen. Calling customer service I was told that because there were strange buying patterns on my credit card that I would have to talk to the security department to get the card reinstated. Unfortunately that department was closed. So, I asked the CS rep, now that I am stuck in the middle of Oregon without enough gas to get to my destination and cannot get a motel, what does he recommend I do? His only response was I should have let them know I planned to travel before taking the trip.
Fortunately, I also had about a grand in cash with me for emergencies (BTW, money that some Police departments these days would confiscate if they had pulled me over.) The next day, I gave the Security department hell, letting them know how they had screwed me and that I did not require their permission to travel.
These days, when a CS rep starts that "retention sales crap," I just tell them in a calm and steady voice "I am not interested in hearing about any of your services, offers, processes, or policies - please just cancel the service." When they proceed anyway to try to sell me, I cut them off and tell them again, "I just want to cancel the service. Please do it now." If they still continue to solicit a reason - it is off to the races and the stream of obscenities that follow is pretty bad.
I don't like playing games with CS people who cannot take a simple request. I know they are required to go through the sales routine, but it doesn't make me any less agitated. I fault corporate "leaders" who put their CS people in a bad position with their insistence in sales over customer service; that they should be able to recognize when someone is not willing to play games and just get down to the business at hand.
In the future, what I would like to say instead is "I want to cancel, will you take care of my request or do I have to call someone else?" And then hang up and try to get another rep - but I also know this is a waste of my time.
I wouldn't call that a hair trigger... I would have been REALLY TICKED as well!
I, a usually calm person, would have been screaming and yelling into the phone too. I don't think it is you, it is that customer service really STINKS these days. They deserve to be yelled at for pulling these stunts.
As for the credit card, this is getting to be quite sticky these days with stolen credit card information. I think the best plan for that is to have two credit cards and some spare cash. Someone can get your number and then your card is suddenly cut off - no telling when that will happen. Best they cut it off so they don't run up a bunch of charges.
For "normal" reasonable old fashioned (nice) customer service people, a bit of assertiveness training will do. Just repeat the same thing over and over until they get it.
I want to cancel my account!
I want to cancel my account!
I want to cancel my account!
Etc.
If they don't get it by the third time, try someone else or ask to speak to a supervisor. If three different people do this to you, then go nuts and scream and yell into the phone to your hearts content! (They clearly deserve it!)
My trigger is incompetent medical professionals. When i come in and tell them my sx and what i suspect is wrong, i feel i deserve to be taken seriously. I know my body better than they do and they should acknowledge that and not be dismissive and waste my time. I can get pretty heated when i made an effort to be seen and then not really be "seen."
The CS reps i have a little more empathy for. I don't expect anything from them. Not even competence. I was on the phone w Verizon just last night for OVER AN HOUR at 3am trying to get her help me switch one line to another line. She had no idea what she was doing. When she told me to take the battery out, i just stated calmly, "the battery states 'do not remove battery' all over it."
Everything i do w CS i try to remain composed and speak in monotone. Might sound contrary to reason but i think they listen to you more the less emotion you show and keep it in a "matter of fact" tone. Your low energy will get their energy to sync in this same passive way (if that is what you need.)
They do that all the time. you call them and say I want to cancel my insurance with you. ( you have plenty of good reasons why & it is because you want to use another insurance company) they ask the stupidest question "Well dont you want to have insurance?" or when you call the bank to ask your balance, they then say "oh i notice that you dont have bank protection, and then start their spiel. I cut them off immediately and say firmly NO THANK YOU.
Then when you do talk with the person and are done, you just need to say goodby and hang up and get back to work. but they do not just say goodbye, they say a whole bunch of Is there anything else we can do for you? (no!) We appreciate your business and appreicate you calling us today (Thank you but i really have to go) Yes, anytime that you need to call us for customer service, you can dial 1-800-555-3232. (I ALREADY TOLD YOU I HAVE TO GO TO WORK, CAN YOU JUST HANG UP????????????) I understand thank you, but before you go I notice that you dont have any virus protection and we have a special offer just for callers today (NO I JUST WANT TO KNOW MY BALANCE GOODBYE) Well thank you Ma'am we appreicate your 10 years of banking with us!
Imagine having that kind of call - Im exaggerating a little but a lot of conversations happen just like the above to me
I have embrace my short temper long ago, gives you better control over it. Many, many things tick me off, I stretch my patience so much.
^^this^^
i to have had issues with a short temper, and i too have embraced it long ago. it has taken a while, but i also have developed some serious patience. but that patience can be tested, and has been, a few times over the years, and i too have gone off on CS representatives who get stuck in a rut.
one thing i do is try to remember that they have a job to do, and that most of them were just hires off the street that have to read a script, and that they tend to get confused if they venture off the script. i know this because i have done the same job they do.
in the end the best thing you can do is try. remember not perfection, but progression. you keep trying to do the best you can, and when you get to the point where you just have to go off, try very hard to temper your explosion.
as to the credit card deal, i agree. when you travel you really need two credit cards, and a debit card, and some cash as well. not a lot of cash, say $200 or so. i have run into the same thing you did. one year when i was retuning from virginia, i was towing the falcon my aunt gave me. the problem was that i was using more fuel, and stopping more often than i usually did. when i got into deming, nm i tried to get a hotel for the night, but the card i was using was also put on hold. and i too had to wait until the security office opened to resolve the issue. unfortunately for me it was a saturday night. so i whipped out one of my other cards and used that for the rest of the trip.
I've always had a bad temper myself, but you need to look more closely at what it does to you...
High blood pressure, arterial damage, strokes, etc. I'm 51 now and after having been to the E.R. a couple of times, it's just not worth it! Find a way to release your pent-up anger, please, before it kills you!
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(They clearly deserve it!)
