people that make comments about one's appearance/how they dress (men, husband)

[StAcKhOuSe]

have you ever had an acquaintance/co-worker make some comments about how you dressed or your general appearance?

girl at work kept going on about how my shoes didn't match my pants. im a guy, we don't really care about that stuff(at least I don't). I don't have the disposable income to accessorize every aspect of my closing with matching colors and dress shoes are wicked expensive. i wanted to fire back about how she dresses like a street hooker, but i just shrugged my shoulders. next day, she comes into work randomly wearing pajamas. this is a business casual environment, mind you.

another guy commented on how I should unbutton the top button on my shirt. same guy also commented about me wearing flip flops on casual Friday. I was like dude your wife didn't complain and that shut him up. this is the same guy that wore a beret to work last friday that looked totally ridiculous. really bro??? i told him nice Halloween custom and he got all mad about it.

I consider both co-workers to be on the loud/annoying end of the extroversion spectrum.

I go to work for a paycheck, not to get fashion tips. I aint trying to be no will smith lookin' playboy. which leads me to this question. do you think people that openly make unsolicited "constructive criticism" about others wardrobe choices are actually insecure about their own appearance? and why do they think they are entitled to wear what they want without others giving it back to them? 6 years ago, i would have been self-conscious about what they said. but nowadays, i really don't care.

[BirdieBelle]

Originally Posted by StAcKhOuSe

have you ever had an acquaintance/co-worker make some comments about how you dressed or your general appearance?

girl at work kept going on about how my shoes didn't match my pants. im a guy, we don't really care about that stuff(at least I don't). I don't have the disposable income to accessorize every aspect of my closing with matching colors and dress shoes are wicked expensive. i wanted to fire back about how she dresses like a street hooker, but i just shrugged my shoulders. next day, she comes into work randomly wearing pajamas. this is a business casual environment, mind you.

another guy commented on how I should unbutton the top button on my shirt. same guy also commented about me wearing flip flops on casual Friday. I was like dude your wife didn't complain and that shut him up. this is the same guy that wore a beret to work last friday that looked totally ridiculous. really bro??? i told him nice Halloween custom and he got all mad about it.

I consider both co-workers to be on the loud/annoying end of the extroversion spectrum.

I go to work for a paycheck, not to get fashion tips. I aint trying to be no will smith lookin' playboy. which leads me to this question. do you think people that openly make unsolicited "constructive criticism" about others wardrobe choices are actually insecure about their own appearance? and why do they think they are entitled to wear what they want without others giving it back to them? 6 years ago, i would have been self-conscious about what they said. but nowadays, i really don't care.

I will never understand adults who criticize the appearance of other adult co-workers.

It's good that you know not to be self-conscious, but there's no telling what psychology is that the root of it.

Rather than being aggressive about it, especially with the woman, next time she does it just quietly say, "Is it my turn now? Do you want to hear my critique of YOUR outfit?" Then when she gets curious, just say, "Nah. I'll let you figure it out." And walk away.

At least she'll think twice.

[Marliss]

I think comments about the attire worn to work happens to others more than you realize. A lot of people deal with this situation.

I have a male office friend and one of the other females in the office told him that his shoes didn't match his outfit. He just lightly blew off the comment with a big grin and a shrug, he didn't feel the need to attack her back because he honestly did not care about her opinion.

Sometimes in these situations when you make what you assume to be a quick witted comment back, it can land wrong and come off as snarky, which can make you seem overly defensive and thus insecure. If you really didn't care what others thought, their comments would be like water off a duck's back, it would just roll off of you. Who cares if the office fashionista doesn't like the color of shoes you chose to wear with your pants. A lot of men make this faux pas. But seriously, do you want to turn her meaningless opinion into a battle, or do you want to work in a peaceful work environment? Pick your battles, sometimes it's just smarter to let go of the little things that pop out of small minded people's mouths.

As for the man making the flip flop comment, I don't know where you work, but in most businesses today, flip flops are too casual for causal Friday. Like it or not, people are going to judge you by how you dress and flips flops are unprofessional for most work environments.

[bagster]

On the other hand, if someone told me my fly was open, I'd welcome the criticism. After discretely zipping up, of course.

[LolaSonner]

I was walking past my sister in law's house one day to get some exercise and her husband came out and told me that it was too warm to wear the hat I was wearing. This is a guy who showed up at Thanksgiving in Canada in Bermuda shorts. Some people are control freaks.

[StAcKhOuSe]

Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life

I will never understand adults who criticize the appearance of other adult co-workers.

It's good that you know not to be self-conscious, but there's no telling what psychology is that the root of it.

Rather than being aggressive about it, especially with the woman, next time she does it just quietly say, "Is it my turn now? Do you want to hear my critique of YOUR outfit?" Then when she gets curious, just say, "Nah. I'll let you figure it out." And walk away.

At least she'll think twice.

i'll try that, thanks. i was not really aggressive with her. i was pretty nonchalant about it. all i said was, ''i dont care". with the guy, we bust eachother's chops all the time anyway, so i felt more comfortable giving him hell about his wardrobe choices if he was gonna insult mine.

Sometimes in these situations when you make what you assume to be a quick witted comment back, it can land wrong and come off as snarky, which can make you seem overly defensive and thus insecure. If you really didn't care what others thought, their comments would be like water off a duck's back, it would just roll off of you.

one day, i said to him, "you know, people that comment on and criticize someone else's appearance or wardrobe are actually insecure about how they look". i said it with a smile on my face so that he would think i was joking.

A lot of men make this faux pas. But seriously, do you want to turn her meaningless opinion into a battle, or do you want to work in a peaceful work environment? Pick your battles, sometimes it's just smarter to let go of the little things that pop out of small minded people's mouths.

nah, everyone likes me at work. but at the same time, i am not gonna be a doormat either. people like me because i am quiet, yet assertive and dont take crap from anybody.

As for the man making the flip flop comment, I don't know where you work, but in most businesses today, flip flops are too casual for causal Friday. Like it or not, people are going to judge you by how you dress and flips flops are unprofessional for most work environments.

the women at work wear flip flops all the time, during the week. the only time i would wear flip flops is on a friday. why can the women wear flip flops but i cant wear them?