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I think most people are anxious and insecure to a certain extent. Women may be able to be more honest about their fears than men because men have been socialized within the "boys don't cry" paradigm. I have close friends of both genders and I can assure you that even the ones who put on an unflappable face for the public are all deeply insecure about one thing or another. My partner (male) is a much bigger worrier than I am.
Well, if lazy azz men would actually get off their duffs and participate as equal partners when they are members of a family, life would improve for many women.
Men need to take care of their own aging parents. Men need to share equally in the care of their own children. Men need to share equally in the care of their homes. Men need to take care of themselves.
If more men would actually step up to the plate and behave like responsible adults, women wouldn't be so burdened with the responsibilities that make them worried and anxious.
Thank you to the men who do behave consistantly like responsible adults.
This is a nice post. I'll bump it with reputation points. But just as so I'm going to drive a stake into the heart of it with a simple question:
Have you ever been to a single man's home?
You will see that they are perfectly-capable of managing their dwelling place, and without "worrying" too.
I believe women worry / are anxious because as it exists now women have very little control over what's going on in the world around them
This uncertainty in things (their relationships, their appearance, how the world views them) I believe creates a lot of dread and worry in ladies, who just want acceptance BUT NOT ONLY ACCEPTANCE but also POWER that matches men in an UNFAIR WORLD RIGGED AGAINST THEM where men by default "win" simply by rolling their "lazy azz" out of bed and women have to "try harder" to get noticed and appreciated
This never-ending unsatisfied thirst for power I think will always lead to anxiety and uncertainty about their place
There's nothing wrong with "anxious women"
There's something wrong with the world itself
I hope the world will fix itself so women can be more choosy, have more of their own wealth and power and can make half of the important decisions being made throughout the world
I'm not even going to click on that link because I don't have any interest in anything associated, however remotely, with Drudge.
I will say, however, that I don't think our society looks at and judges men's insecurities the same way as women's. In my opinion, people who are extremely authoritarian, people who vote for leaders who emphasize strength over empathy, people who are obsessed with crime statistics, people who think having firearms always at the ready will save them from danger, etc., etc., are also highly insecure. Women simply manifest their stress in ways that are more obvious. But much of the thinking that runs our country also stems from insecurity. It will, however, never be called that by the "big strong men" who have those insecurities.
This is a nice post. I'll bump it with reputation points. But just as so I'm going to drive a stake into the heart of it with a simple question:
Have you ever been to a single man's home?
You will see that they are perfectly-capable of managing their dwelling place, and without "worrying" too.
I believe women worry / are anxious because as it exists now women have very little control over what's going on in the world around them
This uncertainty in things (their relationships, their appearance, how the world views them) I believe creates a lot of dread and worry in ladies, who just want acceptance BUT NOT ONLY ACCEPTANCE but also POWER that matches men in an UNFAIR WORLD RIGGED AGAINST THEM where men by default "win" simply by rolling their "lazy azz" out of bed and women have to "try harder" to get noticed and appreciated
This never-ending unsatisfied thirst for power I think will always lead to anxiety and uncertainty about their place
There's nothing wrong with "anxious women"
There's something wrong with the world itself
I hope the world will fix itself so women can be more choosy, have more of their own wealth and power and can make half of the important decisions being made throughout the world
Oh yeah, women in 1st world countries have it SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO bad!
That's why women are now getting more degrees than men, there are more women in the work force then men (since '09), a women have the advantage along with minorities get preference for many jobs.
From my experience women PUT all this extra stuff on themselves. Outside of something they absolutely can't control like parents getting sick from my experience women more then men get voluntarily involved in a lot of organizations, charities etc. Which is fine, but when you dedicate yourself to 10 of those is it really that surprising? Me? I just go to work, come home and watch a movie and play games or go to the gym, it's because I make sure I don't have extra stress in my life - at least not any more than is necessary. Seriously, ask any highly stressed/anxiety woman what all she does and chances are she could drop a lot of it and she wouldn't be under as much stress and thus not as much anxiety.
You think women are under a lot of stress now? I'm sure being in charge of global affairs sure as hell isn't going to make it any easier! If women don't want to deal with so much stress/anxiety then they shouldn't routinely bite off much more than they can chew.
Well women bought into the lies of feminist propaganda fed and brainwashed to them since childhood about being strong and independent women. Now they're realizing they have to work for a living AND have to worry about finding a husband that would be a good father and provider. Not to mention when and if they ever do, and end up having children, they STILL have to go back to work for the rest of their lives. No wonder they're depressed.
For me personally, I was far more insecure when I was younger but rarely showed it on the outside.
As I have aged, insecurity has dissipated. My internal security matches my external security.
One of the biggest factors for me is that I stopped worrying what other people thought. Let them think what they want! They're going to think what they want anyway and I have no control over their thought process. However, I do have control over my thought process.
Another thing that I feel is important I forgot to mention is that generally, boys and girls are raised fundamentally differently in how they see the world. Boys are raised to accept that the world is a real unfair, mean, nasty and cruel place and to take their lumps and do the best you can. Girls are raised to believe the world is a fundamentally great amazing place and anything that's wrong can be fixed and they just need to do their part to fix it and everything will be okay which is total baloney but essentially boys are raised with realistic expectations, girls aren't.
To illustrate here is one of my favorite speeches in history, movie or otherwise that tells it like it is:
That is a good example of what boys are taught. I think if parents were to give their daughters a similar type of speech women would have more realistic expectations and not be so surprised when they grow up only to realize the world sucks, it will always suck and that in the end, death is the only real relief one will ever have.
And to those that may say "But the world doesn't have to be so bad, we can change it!!!" good luck with that, but don't blame men when things get real hard and life beats you down and you get extra stress/anxiety trying to hope things can get better for you.
I have 2 twenty something daughters who both graduated from college and grad school. Neither has the fears you mention although one is deathly afraid of birds and the other is creeped out by cats. Maybe I should sue their Universities for putting those fears in their delicate little heads since they're female and clearly can't think or reason for themselves?
Well stated.
Now my daughters got out of school (almost for one) still liking cats and birds, although not together. That never works.
I found this article today linked on Drudge, and I was quite shocked. Does this article ring true? Is this accurate, that most women, in general, are living in insecurity?
Three quarters of women suffer from stress related anxiety? Really?
Those who answered that survey are young, I would guess, since they're readers of Cosmo.
Companies are pushing their employees more since the recession, when they laid off workers and doubled up the work on those remaining. That may be part of it. Also could be that women have more duties outside of work, so that adds stress. Also could be that women aren't raised to be primary wage earners and devote oneself to career, so they have different expectations. They may, for example, expect more regular hours than a male counterpart, who was raised to bust your buns to get ahead.
Just some thoughts. I was stressed out when I worked, although I liked my job. But it was more stressful being poor, when I didn't have a good job.
Another thing that I feel is important I forgot to mention is that generally, boys and girls are raised fundamentally differently in how they see the world. Boys are raised to accept that the world is a real unfair, mean, nasty and cruel place and to take their lumps and do the best you can. Girls are raised to believe the world is a fundamentally great amazing place and anything that's wrong can be fixed and they just need to do their part to fix it and everything will be okay which is total baloney but essentially boys are raised with realistic expectations, girls aren't.
In what universe are girls raised to believe the world is a "fundamentally great amazing place"?
In the universe I was raised in, girls were taught that the world was filled with danger that one must be careful to avoid.
We could get raped, beat up, and killed for no other reason than we are women in the wrong place. We get the wrong stepdad. We are in the wrong bar at the wrong time. We marry the wrong guy.
From the time we are little, we are warned to stick with our friends, don't go off alone. One out every five girls is sexually abused. Guys hoot when you walk by and try stuff in the subways, hallways, elevators...
Talk about "unfair, mean, nasty, and cruel" and doing the best you can under difficult circumstances, the girls would win this one hands down.
The general environment girls live in day to day would encourage caution in anyone with a working synapse.
It is no wonder women are more fearful, worried, and insecure. We live more precarious lives.
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