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Many unsuccessful social drinkers have all these symptoms. I did. I stopped drinking in 1972. Guess what happened?
You wnet back to drinking. LOL
Or.. u becamce anti-social, hehehee. J/k.
Hey TY all on here trying so hard to help. It renews faith that my old hockey-playing days & on ice fights need not conjure the same mentality to argue vs folks re any weakness perceived nowadays. In hockey if u showed weakness or unwillingness to play tough u were targeted individual -- or as a team -- as opponents thought u had no backbone.
It seems when folks disagree today w/ me, I rear back to those 20-30s age days & use same strategy. It worked then ONLY -- as I could party w/ teammates, brawl on ice (or in bars if need be, LOL) & it served me then.
Now assumingly trying to act all sensible it serves me not. I need take inventory & do the math for remaining yrs on earth & my way to carry on sanely -- not w/ insanity as 20-30 yrs ago it served me.
Does this make sense?? Ha, I grewup w/ Rocky movies, Rambo, Schwarzenegger, Seagal, VanDamme, etc. movies.. get the drift? Hmm, wondering if anyone can grasp this mindest & where age plays a role.
I know a few girls that modeled in their 20s, & now older, they crashed n burned & use opioids, benzos, other ellicit drugs, booze & are a mess. Look at older female & guy Hollywood celebs -- & see the rampant use of substances to keep these lifestyles going.
Glad I never attained this delusional career status or noteriety or I'd have OD'd by now, or wrapped a Porsche around a tree, crashed & had a DUI Felony, yada yada.
There's only 12 steps in AA, it took me less than 1 week to work them.
It was quick and in the end, the softer easier way.
I didn't feel better over time, I got better immediately , just like it promised in the big book.
There's a chapter in the big book of AA,
" We Agnostics".
Notice its not The Agnostics.
Everyone who walks into AA has a problem with God.
AA isn't tried and found wanting.
Its found difficult and not tried.
AA is too all or nothing, in my experience. Relapse is really common, but it's not safe to mention in AA that you have relapsed. There is a huge shaming where you have to change your sober date, where sponsors will keep their sponsees from you - it really is like being outcast in shame, like you'd expect from a religious group like the Amish or something (sorry if this example is incorrect).
Plus, I can't stand the whole "I am not worthy" garbage, that is religion-based.
Relapse is not accepted. If you don't like anything, you are in denial. And, everyone who is "counseling" you is someone who is messed up. Someone who has an addictive personality, etc. Most of whom have cross-addictions, like sex addiction, so you can end up in a room full of "sober" sex addicts who will take advantage of your weakness.
It's a room full of sober sick people. I learned I'd rather not hang out with sober sick people. I'd rather look for healthy people to be my friends, and get a counselor who has credentials.
I expected staunch AA defenders to show up and argue with my post. I won't argue my points any further. I just wanted to let the OP know that there are alternatives, in case AA was a turnoff, like it was for me. I don't believe that just because someone has ever abused alcohol, that it is a forever problem. You won't find anyone in AA who won't freak out if you voice that possibility. All or nothing forever doesn't sit right with everyone.
AA is too all or nothing, in my experience. Relapse is really common, but it's not safe to mention in AA that you have relapsed. There is a huge shaming where you have to change your sober date, where sponsors will keep their sponsees from you - it really is like being outcast in shame, like you'd expect from a religious group like the Amish or something (sorry if this example is incorrect).
Plus, I can't stand the whole "I am not worthy" garbage, that is religion-based.
Relapse is not accepted. If you don't like anything, you are in denial. And, everyone who is "counseling" you is someone who is messed up. Someone who has an addictive personality, etc. Most of whom have cross-addictions, like sex addiction, so you can end up in a room full of "sober" sex addicts who will take advantage of your weakness.
It's a room full of sober sick people. I learned I'd rather not hang out with sober sick people. I'd rather look for healthy people to be my friends, and get a counselor who has credentials.
I expected staunch AA defenders to show up and argue with my post. I won't argue my points any further. I just wanted to let the OP know that there are alternatives, in case AA was a turnoff, like it was for me. I don't believe that just because someone has ever abused alcohol, that it is a forever problem. You won't find anyone in AA who won't freak out if you voice that possibility. All or nothing forever doesn't sit right with everyone.
It's not safe to mention you relapsed? I've heard at least 500 times, people saying they relapsed. Let's stick with the truth here. I'm not suggesting your experience is invalid, but it doesn't match my experience, at all. I'm sorry your impression was a negative one, but honestly, it's pretty hard to refute that this program has saved millions of lives.
What's important is to try save someone's life, not who's right or wrong.
Last edited by KaraZetterberg153; 02-26-2018 at 09:04 PM..
AA is too all or nothing, in my experience. Relapse is really common, but it's not safe to mention in AA that you have relapsed. There is a huge shaming where you have to change your sober date, where sponsors will keep their sponsees from you - it really is like being outcast in shame, like you'd expect from a religious group like the Amish or something (sorry if this example is incorrect).
Plus, I can't stand the whole "I am not worthy" garbage, that is religion-based.
Relapse is not accepted. If you don't like anything, you are in denial. And, everyone who is "counseling" you is someone who is messed up. Someone who has an addictive personality, etc. Most of whom have cross-addictions, like sex addiction, so you can end up in a room full of "sober" sex addicts who will take advantage of your weakness.
It's a room full of sober sick people. I learned I'd rather not hang out with sober sick people. I'd rather look for healthy people to be my friends, and get a counselor who has credentials.
I expected staunch AA defenders to show up and argue with my post. I won't argue my points any further. I just wanted to let the OP know that there are alternatives, in case AA was a turnoff, like it was for me. I don't believe that just because someone has ever abused alcohol, that it is a forever problem. You won't find anyone in AA who won't freak out if you voice that possibility. All or nothing forever doesn't sit right with everyone.
OP, another tool that's really nice, is some of the apps by Andrew Johnson. He's Scottish and does meditation apps. If you want to check him out before you buy an app, he has some stuff on YouTube for free:
His apps in the App Store for your phone, are only $3.00. He has a stop drinking one, and one for sleeping and power nap, and many others. You can just buy one or you can buy a bundle. I listen to one before I go to sleep every night and I sleep like a baby. I fall asleep before it's over. I enjoy his accent and he has a really kind, soothing voice. I'm going to buy his weight loss one next month to listen to in the morning.
Further to my original reply to you.
When I first went for help with my drinking (at 50 years old, ya it took me a while) I saw a psychiatrist who refused to treat me until i had 3 months sobriety. I was angry to say the least. The reason I was given finally made sense. The disturbance in an alcoholic's body is caused mainly by alcohol in the brain which is basically insanity. Addiction of any kind including food is projected to the brain's pleasure center. Eventually the addiction to any substance severely handicaps the entire body's chemical composition (blood, kidneys, liver, pancreas, bladder, intestines) and , and if that is true any psychiatric medication introduced into the body will not be effective in the way it was intended, in fact will introduce the possibility of co-morbid dependence and poisoning.
I attended several treatment programs before I landed in a women's residential program for 8 months (@$800/mo) paid for through my medical disability plan.
'“Peer reviewed studies peg the success rate of AA somewhere between five and 10 percent,” writes Dodes. “About one of every 15 people who enter these programs is able to become and stay sober.”'
There's a difference between "drinking too much" and a raging alcoholic in the sense people think of it.
I drink fairly heavily. I need to cut back, but I'm not a raging alcoholic in the common understanding. I show up to work every day. I have a pretty decent job. I look perfectly fine. My health is fine. I plan on cutting it out until Friday to see how I feel. I usually have at least 2-3 beers every couple of days unless I'm sick.
I'm a six pack a night guy 2-3 times per week during the week, and sometimes more, sometimes less on the weekends. I went to Asheville over the weekend, and got pretty hammered Saturday night after the basketball games, and just Uber'd back to the hotel. I slept terribly Saturday night. I haven't done anything like that in months. I'm usually the daytime guy at a brewery, drinking two or three, and almost always out of bars by 8. I no longer drink liquor, and usually only drink wine at a dinner.
When I was in college, I was much closer to that sloppy alcoholic definition. I'd have long breaks between classes sometimes and go get wasted on cheap liquor or Natural Light at the nearby dive bars, then come back for an evening class pretty well goosed. Several of my professors brought my drinking up to me. It was a noticeable problem.
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