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What is it about human nature where we feel the need to argue non-stop to prove a point? Or even say things that you are well aware will engage or enrage another poster?
I mean, something like politics, I understand. But useless stuff?
I've remembered doing the same thing as OP. Somebody would disagree with me on something, we'd get into a little bit, and then I'd post a thread asking others... "She's wrong isn't she?" Sometimes arguments about the dumbest things would go on for days.
The irony is that if nobody posted about the problems they had with their spouse, SO, boss, sibling, parent, best friend, then this place would hold no entertainment value for the finger pointers.
I mean you can tiptoe around this place and only comment on "what is the best time of year to start raising geraniums in North Dakota" and before long, somebody will get their claws in you. I find myself wanting to challenge posters for the dumbest things ... like whether or not you should get a colonoscopy ... "you better get that colonoscopy or you're gonna die, you goddamn idiot". Uh, why? At least I can admit my faults and try and stop myself.
Like only a few posters attempted to defuse the situation by saying they could see both sides of the argument...
Just shows why human nature is pre-disposed to conflict.
I don't think I've ever complained in this forum (any forum, I don't think) about my husband. I would be very hurt, if somehow I found out that he was complaining about me to a bunch of strangers, so I wouldn't do it to him.
Sometimes people don't know what is normal and what is not. They might not have had good modeling between their parents, or they suffered through some bad relationships. I think it is OK to come here and ask about stuff. What bothers me a bit is that so often they seem to disregard advice that is given.
But I think if they sense something is not right in their relationship, is is fine to come here and ask.
And many times several of us are saying "red flag" "red flag" about emotional abuse or similar. So, I think we do good when we call attention to stuff like that.
This is really insightful. I came from a good home, so I did not recognize a dysfunctional relationship. At 20 I got into a long term relationship with a very intelligent guy who so impressed me, I didn't see that I had no friends, we were together 24/7, he was a megalomaniac...maybe if I'd had people to ask, it wouldn't have lasted 17 years.
I see nothing wrong with asking other's opinions. Isn't that what CD is about?
I don't think I've ever complained in this forum (any forum, I don't think) about my husband. I would be very hurt, if somehow I found out that he was complaining about me to a bunch of strangers, so I wouldn't do it to him.
I'll brag on him though.
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