I feel like my therapist isn't listening to me (psychologist, narcissistic, therapy)
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I've been seeing a psychiatric nurse practitioner who prescibes my meds and provides therapy. She's been great for many years. I do appreciate sometimes that she'll share personal experiences with me. It helps to normalize some of my own thoughts and feelings as I don't really have a support system.
Recently, she diagnosed me with adhd and is trying to determine if my original dx of bipolar 2 was wrong or if I have both.
Lately, when I express my feeling depressed or sad in general she keeps reminding me of how well I am doing. Also, how far I have come over the years. Then, she makes attributions to how I feel to me having adhd. She too has similar dx as me as she has self-disclosed indirectly.
I feel very lonely at times which she is aware of. I also still feel the need to on occasion express feelings I have about a narcissistic guy who basically used me for 3 yrs...because I let him. She seems to avoid my comments now.
I feel irritated with her now. But still appreciative because really she is the only person I have to talk to besides forums. I do have a couple friends but I never want to burden them and sometimes feel distant from them anyway.
Should I tell my therapist about how I am feeling? If so, how can I do it without being offensive.
I feel a little disappointed in my therapist right now. Maybe we've gotten too familiar with each other? Should I consider changing therapists?
I realize my questions may not be ones that can be fully answered. But I appreciate any thoughts or feedback.
I, personally, would not continue seeing anyone, especially a therapist, where I could not be myself and express my feelings. Why go if you can't do that? If it's been years of therapy, surely you should by now feel comfortable enough to say what you think. If not, then yes, I would move on. Nothing lasts forever and relationships change. This is supposed to be a helping relationship for you; if it isn't anymore, go elsewhere.
I've been seeing a psychiatric nurse practitioner who prescibes my meds and provides therapy. She's been great for many years. I do appreciate sometimes that she'll share personal experiences with me. It helps to normalize some of my own thoughts and feelings as I don't really have a support system.
Recently, she diagnosed me with adhd and is trying to determine if my original dx of bipolar 2 was wrong or if I have both.
Lately, when I express my feeling depressed or sad in general she keeps reminding me of how well I am doing. Also, how far I have come over the years. Then, she makes attributions to how I feel to me having adhd. She too has similar dx as me as she has self-disclosed indirectly.
I feel very lonely at times which she is aware of. I also still feel the need to on occasion express feelings I have about a narcissistic guy who basically used me for 3 yrs...because I let him. She seems to avoid my comments now.
I feel irritated with her now. But still appreciative because really she is the only person I have to talk to besides forums. I do have a couple friends but I never want to burden them and sometimes feel distant from them anyway.
Should I tell my therapist about how I am feeling? If so, how can I do it without being offensive.
I feel a little disappointed in my therapist right now. Maybe we've gotten too familiar with each other? Should I consider changing therapists?
I realize my questions may not be ones that can be fully answered. But I appreciate any thoughts or feedback.
I knew a therapist and she said after years of listening to other's issues, it was killing her. Last I heard she was looking for a new profession.
Definitely talk to your therapist - and consider that if you have to "walk on eggshells" with her, that's also an issue to discuss. She can either put you at ease or her answers will help you decide what to do.
Of course, you could still see her often enough so she will renew your meds while seeing someone else for the "talk therapy" portion. Otherwise you'd need to see someone similar to her as most psychiatrists do very minimal talking and spend most of their time prescribing. You'd likely have a higher out-of-pocket with a psychiatrist than a psychiatric nurse.
Just some things to think about - but definitely consider talking to her since you've been a client for years and maybe that doesn't need to go to waste.
Your therapist may be trying to help you by directing your thoughts more positively.
Your thoughts create feelings, so if you want to feel good, you have to learn to reframe negative thoughts.
Expressing negative thoughts only makes them stronger - you can do it once-in-awhile, but if you want to be happy, you need to curtail indulging in negative thinking.
I would talk to her and tell her how you're feeling and really listen to her response.
Sounds like you are in a strong pattern of negativity.
I've been seeing a psychiatric nurse practitioner who prescibes my meds and provides therapy. She's been great for many years. I do appreciate sometimes that she'll share personal experiences with me. It helps to normalize some of my own thoughts and feelings as I don't really have a support system.
Recently, she diagnosed me with adhd and is trying to determine if my original dx of bipolar 2 was wrong or if I have both.
Lately, when I express my feeling depressed or sad in general she keeps reminding me of how well I am doing. Also, how far I have come over the years. Then, she makes attributions to how I feel to me having adhd. She too has similar dx as me as she has self-disclosed indirectly.
I feel very lonely at times which she is aware of. I also still feel the need to on occasion express feelings I have about a narcissistic guy who basically used me for 3 yrs...because I let him. She seems to avoid my comments now.
I feel irritated with her now. But still appreciative because really she is the only person I have to talk to besides forums. I do have a couple friends but I never want to burden them and sometimes feel distant from them anyway.
Should I tell my therapist about how I am feeling? If so, how can I do it without being offensive.
I feel a little disappointed in my therapist right now. Maybe we've gotten too familiar with each other? Should I consider changing therapists?
I realize my questions may not be ones that can be fully answered. But I appreciate any thoughts or feedback.
Tell her what you have said here. You can start positively by telling her you appreciate your relationship and whatever she has done to help you but that lately you are not feeling that your sessions are productive. Be ready to tell her specifically what is bothering you or what you would like from her and see what she says.
A good therapy session imo should have you leaving with you feeling better and somewhat relieved or unburdened of negative feelings/emotions. Sure, things get stirred up that can be unsettling, but in general you should feel better.
As someone who has seen a therapist I can tell you there is a need for you to be open and honest with what you say. Otherwise your therapist cannot help you find the answers you seek. Help them help you by being candid with your thoughts.
OP, if you get medications from your NP, you could always consider going to her for medication management only (usually 15 minutes at a time once every couple of months) and seeing someone else for therapy. These days this is more common than someone going to the same person for medication management and therapy.
I think with medication providers, their focus is usually on trying to figure out if your diagnoses/medications are right and are working. From her perspective, you are doing well. That doesn’t mean that you can’t benefit from therapy, particularly from someone who isn’t going to be looking to prescribe anything. Generally s/he’ll work with your NP, but a person can be dong “well” on medications but still have things that need to be worked through in more depth.
Personally I'd speak with the therapist. There's no need for you to find a "polite" way to say all these things. To be honest, I read your post and didn't see anything offensive. This is a professional relationship you two have, and even if you don't want to offend or make her sad or somehow negatively impact her, that is her job.
There's no point going to therapy if you cannot be open with your own thoughts. Don't worry, even if she hears your thoughts and can't help, you still can search for another therapist. But not being open and searching for another one without even trying to express yourself, in my opinion, is giving up without trying.
What's important is that you try. Don't be afraid of coming of as needy or offensive or anything. Just say it in your own unique way. Good luck
Also, I cannot speak highly enough of this licensed forensic/law/psychologist who posts absolutely fantastic self help videos on youtube for free. This woman is HIGHLY qualified, it amazes me that she has unlimited therapy videos for free.
Look up her credentials too.
Dr Tracey Marks https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCL2...ZFYwk6-WXD6hpA
One of the videos she has is "ruminating" which you may want to watch, just to get your brain ticking about why you might be revisiting this past relationship often in your thoughts.
If you watch enough of her videos, it will pull you out of a funk.
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