Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I agree that some of these questions she listed, which do indeed come off as "inane", might really be asking for something else but not asking the question properly.
For example, asking for clarification about materials sent by USPS. The obvious answer to that particular inane question is "We will put it in an envelope, make sure it has sufficient postage, and address it to you."
I suspect the person is asking something else, like how long will it take, when can they expect to receive it, what materials exactly will they get--but that is not what they took the time to actually say.
Same with the March question. Obviously a dismayed person wanting to know if there isn't another training session before that. But that's not what they asked, and this looks like a case of "I don't like what it said, I would like a different answer, please." Which in and of itself is pretty inane, but I was married to someone who would have me call someplace for information, and if he didn't like the answer, he would say, "Call them again and say <exactly what I had already said to them>." As if calling again was going to get us a different answer. I have met a few people like that over my lifetime, often at work.
We see it right here on City-Data all the time with inane thread titles. Then you read the post, and what the post is asking is not really what the inane thread title said.
It would be nice if people thought out their words before they wrote or said them, but they don't.
You can't change other people, and their "inane" questions (or whatever the fuss might be).
But you can change your response to them. The result doesn't have to be "draining" to you. You're choosing that.
I'm amazed how so many people focus on what they can't change, instead of what they can, and how they avoid personal responsibility.
Exactly! This is what I’m asking. I know I can’t change the questions that I’m getting, I was just trying to explain what those questions are to illustrate what I’m facing. What I’ve been asking is how I can change my attitude toward them? What are some mental strategies that I can do? I’ve tried just, “coping” with it for a few years and that’s not working anymore. I am completely serious when I say that quitting my job or retiring early are the only things I can think of to get away from it.
Sorry to not give a suggestion although my observation may be used as as an understanding approach. Sometimes when I see poorly worded questions I wonder if it may be coming from an English-as-second-language person who doesn't currently have the vocabulary to express the question properly.
I think this may be happening more frequently now than in the past. It is frustrating for both parties when this occurs.
It's unfortunate to mention the state of education in the use of the English language these days but even native speakers have been affected. Yours is another good example of why it is important to be able to communicate clearly.
It is all due to people these days being ignorant and inconsiderate. Nothing more. Just morons for the most part. Get used it it, it gets worse with each generation.
IME, there are three sub-types of ignorant.
The ignorant who are teachable given some investment.
The ignorant who simply cannot absorb or make use of information.
Then there are the ignorant who refuse to learn. They're content to depend on others. When something doesn't turn out the way they want, they turn around and blame those same others.
Last edited by Parnassia; 01-05-2023 at 06:02 PM..
Sure, that's what is said now so people aren't shy speaking up in a class or business meeting.
However, when I was a kid my parents OFTEN said "Ask a silly question, get a silly answer!". That taught me to at least try to figure something out because they wouldn't put up with nonsensical questions and would give me a crazy unhelpful answer until I put a bit of effort into it.
I think that still holds - hence my advice to "slow walk" an answer rather than reinforce more silly questions by responding immediately.
I hope this question isn't inane, . And I really thought about not posting this because it seems like such a mean question to ask, but I am trying to get to the root of why I feel the way I do so I can change things for the better for myself at work. I want to be clear I am not saying the people are inane, just some of their questions.
And I almost wrote about this in the the employment forum but it's really not so much an employment question than psychology question. I think the answer there would be to get new job, but I don't want to do that if I don't have to. I am considering it though... have been for a while. But wasn't sure why I wanted to leave or change. I think it's the drudgery and a big part of that drudgery are the inane questions I answer every... single... day.
But maybe if I understand this, why I feel bad about getting these questions, I can figure a way to cope better. I do like where I work, what I do, and my coworkers (and most of the regular customers). But two hours or so into the work day, as I am answering the email that came in overnight, I feel like I just want to shut off my computer and walk away.
I am the program manager for our training program and while answering questions is one of my duties, my core duties are really more along the lines of a program manger. There used to be a part time admin assistant for my department who answered emails and phone calls, but the manager I replaced a few years ago died suddenly and the admin assistant left the company a few months after. They hired just me for both jobs.
The programs I manage are all advanced trainings for people who went to college, have a degree in the field, and are working professionals. So I am working with an educated group that, presumably based on their careers/the training we offer, knows how to communicate well. Most of them have a lot more college than I do (most have master's degrees).
I get normal, good questions that need answers and I don't mind answer those. But so many more questions are just stupid (I hate saying it like that, but honestly, it's how I feel about it). I swear they must be trolling to ask some of these things. But I can't ignore the trolls because they usually are professionals asking these questions in all seriousness. To give you an idea of what questions I get, here are a few recent ones from the past couple of days:
- "Your website says the information packet will be mailed by USPS to my address. Can you explain?"
- "The schedule says the next program starts in March. Does the next program really start in March?"
- "Why do I have to pay for the training?"
- "The website says the training is optional. What does that mean?"
- "Will my employer reimburse me for the training?" (I don't know who their employer is let alone what their policies are).
- "Do I have to be in the military to get the military discount?" (This is from someone who isn't and never was in the military).
- Received on New Year's Day, around 8am, which was a holiday and a Sunday. And I had an out of office message reply set up: "Would you send me information on your program?" (that was a normal enough request but then there was a follow up email around 9am) "Why aren't you answering me?" (around 9:30) "Your organization isn't very professional to ignore me like this! It makes me wonder if you are just a scam!" (starts sending emails to my coworkers and my boss complaining about me not replying in a timely manner). He got an out of office message for each email too.
I could go on. But I think this gives the idea of what I am dealing with. And almost always, when someone starts with a question like this, they have more, similar (silly) questions. It's never just one and done. And there seem to be so many more of them now than in previous years. I don't know why that is (maybe I am just starting to notice them more).
I spend several hours a day answering emails, phone calls, and questions. Not all are like above, but there are enough like this every day. I start the day bright and cheery and happily answer customers until I start getting to ones like the examples above. After a couple of hours of answering these inane questions, I just start to feel dragged down. It sucks the joy out of the job. And I don't know why or what it is that makes it so draining. Some days I feel depressed about work before I even start. Lately I've been toying with the idea of FIRE (basically retiring earlier than the typical 65). I was shocked to see I could pull it off, retire early in 9 years and I am giving that serious consideration too. Maybe I can spend my time doing volunteer work that makes me happier (don't have time for it right now).
But until then, I can I go to alter my attitude and make myself happier with my job because the questions aren't going to stop coming.
Any insight here on what this could all be?
in reading those questions i can see why people may be asking them, and no they are not inane. they are reasonable and it makes sense why people are asking the. examples:
"- "Your website says the information packet will be mailed by USPS to my address. Can you explain?"
People may clarifying if it will be shipped by US mail, or by United Parcel Service. That is a common question and it is reasonable. We get that question asked regularly. Fix the website and spell it out for clarity. for instance US mail, so the address we receive needs to be a US Postal Service mailing address. OR United Parcel Service, so we are unable to ship to post office boxes, this must be a street address.
if you are getting a question repeatedly, then it means your materials need to be clearer to begin with, to make them more user friendly. it sounds like your stance is impatient and lacking awareness, rather than being customer service oriented.
- "The schedule says the next program starts in March. Does the next program really start in March?" We also get that question. Again it is not inane and it makes perfect sense. They are checking to confirm that the information printed or posted is still current and has not changed. This they need to confirm for their own planning and scheduling. They could also be confirming whether there is space available. The course could yes be in March, but it may already be full so they could be checking whether there is availability to enroll.
- "Why do I have to pay for the training?"
There is nothing inane about that question. If you get it asked repeatedly, then have as part of your materials a handout or bullet list that covers this. So you can answer good question, please see page 4 in the orientation packet. In this way it provides the information without taking up class time which can be spent on the actual training. Again i don't see why you'd be impatient and critical when this is valuable to observe and use it to revise your promotional and training materials, to make them more effective. It is an ongoing process improvement. That is part of the trainer or presenter doing their job well.
- "The website says the training is optional. What does that mean?"
That is not inane either. If this is a course say for continuing education credits, do they need to take the training or can they satisfy it simply by studying the materials provided on their own and testing out. It is a reasonable question. Again if it's not clear, then include this on a Q&A sheet or handout which is part of the training.
- "Will my employer reimburse me for the training?" (I don't know who their employer is let alone what their policies are). Let them know you will provide a syllabus, schedule, course hours, and details on course content, trainer, time, and verify attendance. And they can submit that to their company. In other words it is assuring to let them know what documents you'll provide. This shows professionalism. It is no different than going to a doctor appointment and finding out "save this printed receipt, to present for reimbursement." ANd then it is up to them to follow up with their own company. Again on your Q&A list, clarify that it is up to their own company to decide if they will be reimbursed. That is a reasonable question.
- "Do I have to be in the military to get the military discount?" (This is from someone who isn't and never was in the military). That is also a reasonable question. Because there are programs which are made available to not just active duty or reservists, but also to families of military. I work in an industry where we get asked this regularly. Again, add it to you Q&A list.
Every question you are asked is reasonable or else they wouldn't be asking. And see them as places where your own training materials and presentation can be refined, fine tuned, clarified. That is why feedback and questions are so helpful and useful. If it is taking time away from the training, have a stock answer like "let's get through this segment of the training, and we will address questions at the end of the morning." that is normal for trainings i've been in. the class generally appreciates it because it doesn't short change time for the actual training. If these questions are asked from reviewing your website, then put additional information on the website, or on a Q&A section.
it sounds like you might be just getting burned out.
And your question, that's good question Ruth! I definitely do the job of at least 1.5 people (maybe two full timers by now). I replaced the full time manager and his assistant. The job did not change, I just took on the duties of both. Then again, I am a single/divorced mom (my daughter is in college now). Her dad left me when she was really young and kind of went off and did his own life (only seeing his daughter twice a month by his choice). So I got used to doing the jobs of two people a long time ago.
Gee, you're an awfully good sport about it, all things considered...
I said I wasn't going to do this, but you aren't the first person to try to help by pointing out how these questions might not be inane. It's my fault for posting very simplified examples. I was just trying to quickly illustrate a point since I wanted to focus more on the psychology of what I can do to help myself.
When I say trust me, these were really inane questions, they really were. I very carefully picked questions that really were silly and ate up a lot of my time, preventing me from getting "real" work done or answering people with "real" questions. For whatever reason, few on this forum believe me and are trying to find ways to say maybe I am looking at things incorrectly, and I get that. But I don't think I am and it's shifting focus away from solutions that I can do to keep my sanity since these questions will never stop.
So here is more detail on each so we can put speculation behind us.
Keep in mind NONE of these are REPEATED questions I often get. Literally, it's what I've gotten this week from Tuesday until I posted this. I posted them because it's so typical to get these weird, one off questions. But they are one offs, the only time I've been asked these specific things in the years I've been doing this. But I get questions of THIS CALIBER all the time.
Sorry for the caps, just trying to stress things, not shout in writing.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tzaphkiel
in reading those questions i can see why people may be asking them, and no they are not inane. they are reasonable and it makes sense why people are asking the. examples:
"- "Your website says the information packet will be mailed by USPS to my address. Can you explain?"
People may clarifying if it will be shipped by US mail, or by United Parcel Service. That is a common question and it is reasonable. We get that question asked regularly. Fix the website and spell it out for clarity. for instance US mail, so the address we receive needs to be a US Postal Service mailing address. OR United Parcel Service, so we are unable to ship to post office boxes, this must be a street address.
if you are getting a question repeatedly, then it means your materials need to be clearer to begin with, to make them more user friendly. it sounds like your stance is impatient and lacking awareness, rather than being customer service oriented.
It's a field on the website where people fill out their address so things can be mailed to them. The person who emailed me ended up needing a call so I could handhold her to tell her, "put your name in the name field." Put your street address or PO box in the field that says "street address or PO Box," etc. That is what ended up being the solution. I looked in my log, it was a 27 minute call while I wanted for her to type each field and then proceed to tell me her life story. To be fair, after writing that, I suspect she was lonely, but it doesn't make things any less frustrating for me to see work piling up while watch my work pile up while I help someone figure out what their state abbreviation is.
Quote:
- "The schedule says the next program starts in March. Does the next program really start in March?" We also get that question. Again it is not inane and it makes perfect sense. They are checking to confirm that the information printed or posted is still current and has not changed. This they need to confirm for their own planning and scheduling. They could also be confirming whether there is space available. The course could yes be in March, but it may already be full so they could be checking whether there is availability to enroll.
I was asked this when a person was looking at our website. Right now no classes are scheduled and it says that the next program will start in March 2023. Watch this page for updates or sign up here for email notifications of updates. The person who emailed me, I guess, just couldn't believe there was nothing until March. Then he wanted to know if there was a way to find out when items were added, I literally directed them back to the page and pointed out where he could sign up for alerts. I was then asked if I could just personally reach out since he didn't want email. I felt like saying, "put on your big boy pants and take some responsibly for yourself, I am not your personal assistant and I don't have time to track and personally call each person, that would be a full time job in and of itself." Of course, I didn't say this, I just thought it.
I suggested the other option was to watch the webpage, maybe set up a reminder to themselves on their calendar to check the page. Then I was asked how to set up a reminder to which I just said, I don't know, I don't know what you use for a calendar. Eventually the person signed up for the email reminders.
Quote:
- "Why do I have to pay for the training?"
There is nothing inane about that question. If you get it asked repeatedly, then have as part of your materials a handout or bullet list that covers this. So you can answer good question, please see page 4 in the orientation packet. In this way it provides the information without taking up class time which can be spent on the actual training. Again i don't see why you'd be impatient and critical when this is valuable to observe and use it to revise your promotional and training materials, to make them more effective. It is an ongoing process improvement. That is part of the trainer or presenter doing their job well.
I ended up calling this person. This person didn't like the idea of paying and thought that the seminar teachers should all work for free and that we should somehow get hotel space for seminars for free too. He wanted me to be able to tell him were every dollar of of the enrollment fees went. We aren't a government agency, we aren't a public entity, we are a private business. Basically, this person was railing against the Capitalist system to me and wasting my time. I was on the phone for 22 minutes with him according to my phone log.
Quote:
- "The website says the training is optional. What does that mean?"
That is not inane either. If this is a course say for continuing education credits, do they need to take the training or can they satisfy it simply by studying the materials provided on their own and testing out. It is a reasonable question. Again if it's not clear, then include this on a Q&A sheet or handout which is part of the training.
The person literally did not know what optional mean. I had to define the word itself. Okay, maybe English wasn't her first language like another poster said, but why not just google a word if you don't know what it means?
Quote:
- "Will my employer reimburse me for the training?" (I don't know who their employer is let alone what their policies are). Let them know you will provide a syllabus, schedule, course hours, and details on course content, trainer, time, and verify attendance. And they can submit that to their company. In other words it is assuring to let them know what documents you'll provide. This shows professionalism. It is no different than going to a doctor appointment and finding out "save this printed receipt, to present for reimbursement." ANd then it is up to them to follow up with their own company. Again on your Q&A list, clarify that it is up to their own company to decide if they will be reimbursed. That is a reasonable question.
Employer was a small business. I told him to ask the business owner. The business owner said yes she would pay. This person just didn't know who to ask. Maybe I am cynical that I think it should be pretty obvious to ask the person you want to pay for something if they will pay for it. Maybe it was his first job and he had helicopter parents his whole life. This actually ended up not taking too much of my time, but these little things add up.
Quote:
- "Do I have to be in the military to get the military discount?" (This is from someone who isn't and never was in the military). That is also a reasonable question. Because there are programs which are made available to not just active duty or reservists, but also to families of military. I work in an industry where we get asked this regularly. Again, add it to you Q&A list.
I already went into this one earlier in this thread when someone else did what you did and spelled out how each could be a good question. Nope, this person was not asking because he was retired military, a reservist, a dependent, works for the DoD. Our website says "active duty military" and says you have to provide a copy of your current orders or a letter from your command as proof. No, this person never had a military connection. Just wanted a discount and was playing dumb. Asked if we could give the discount because he supports the troops.
Quote:
it sounds like you might be just getting burned out.
I think you are right about that for sure. I ended up just taking half this week off. I felt bad about that since we literally just got back from the holidays. But I have hundreds of hours of PTO and I just found out they are going to be cashing out all of our banked PTO to reset things. I like cash, but at this point, I just want part of my life back. I plan to go to a museum today with my daughter (who is still home from college). She likes art museums and I figure I can just be one of those people who finds a painting and just stares at it for a while.
Gee, you're an awfully good sport about it, all things considered...
Maybe I used to be a good sport. Like the previous poster said, I am probably getting burnt out (and I know I am getting crotchety)
I used to laugh these off but it's just getting to me anymore. Like water torture. Remember, these are questions from people who are supposedly smarter and more educated than I am. That's why I find the questions like this day in and day out inane, I KNOW these people are intelligent. It's getting demoralizing.
Last edited by WalkingLiberty1919D; 01-06-2023 at 06:06 AM..
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
. And I really thought about not posting this because it seems like such a mean question to ask, but I am trying to get to the root of why I feel the way I do so I can change things for the better for myself at work. I want to be clear I am not saying the people are inane, just some of their questions. 
