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We're considering relocating to the Cary, Holly Springs, Apex area and want to know what the best things about each area are. We are a family of four with two small kids so good schools are important. We also are from NYC (please don't yell at me) and we hear there are a lot of New Yorkers in Cary we are not necessarily set on doing that. We'd like to get a nice detached house with a bit of land where we can have some space for sports and BBQs.
A few of the things that I'm concerned with is that my children are mixed (Asian and White) so we'd like an area with some diversity. We also would like an area that has something to do without having to drive a far ways to do it.
Basically, and please don't take this the wrong way, we are used to a certain level of activity and we don't want to be bored. NYC has conditioned us to a speeder lifestyle with lots to do and it's all fairly close. Public transportation doesn't hurt either.
I know that there is only one NYC and I don't expect to get that anywhere else. I know there are tradeoffs that we have to make to get the good stuff like a better quality of life and not having to worry about watching out for dog crap on the sidewalk and not paying 48 for a pint of beer and things like that - and we're looking forward to that. I just don't want to put the kids through too much social shock. It's going to be a big enough change to leave the only place they've ever known.
So my question is, out of those three (or maybe another town in the area, which one's the liveliest and most walkable? :-)
Well you must have heard that CARY stand for Containment Area for Relocated Yankees...yup, all us former NYers are contained within its borders. None in any of the other surrounding towns! They don't allow any spillover. My sister lives in Apex, but she's trying to pass herself off as a Jerseyite.
OK, enough kidding around. Honestly your post is a bit confusing - are you being asked to re-locate? Because you do seem to want to have your cake and eat it too. If you're worried about being bored here, then why is it on your radar? It kind of makes no sense.
Yes this is a great place to raise kids, and no those of us who moved here from elsewhere (including yours truly, from 20 miles outside midtown Manhattan) aren't interested in changing what it is, or trying to make sure new transplants aren't bored.
The entire Triangle is pretty much family friendly suburbia - it is what it is. It's also very diverse. No one will look twice at your kids.
PS - I live in Cary and one of my neighbors lets their dog crap on the sidewalk - right in front of the poop bag-and garbage can-setup provided by the HOA...if I find who out it is, fugeddaboutit.
These towns are nearly identical, and none of them are walkable in the "new york city" sense of the phrase. This is the suburbs in every sense of the word. Strip malls, mini vans, soccer, and chain restaurants everywhere. Expect to drive/bike to get around, but traffic is minimal so it's not the hassle that driving in NYC is. Public transportation is spotty.
Diversity isn't an issue, this area has a significant Asian and South Asian population.
Schools are county-wide, not by town. So all three of those suburbs have the same school system. Nearly all the western wake schools are good, if it's a nice neighborhood it's probably a nice school.
If you are used to and enjoy an NYC pace, the suburbs of a small southern city are pretty likely to be boring to you.
I like the suburbs, it's clean and convenient, but I have a feeling this isn't what you are looking for.
Well you must have heard that CARY stand for Containment Area for Relocated Yankees...yup, all us former NYers are contained within its borders. None in any of the other surrounding towns! They don't allow any spillover. My sister lives in Apex, but she's trying to pass herself off as a Jerseyite.
OK, enough kidding around. Honestly your post is a bit confusing - are you being asked to re-locate? Because you do seem to want to have your cake and eat it too. If you're worried about being bored here, then why is it on your radar? It kind of makes no sense.
Yes this is a great place to raise kids, and no those of us who moved here from elsewhere (including yours truly, from 20 miles outside midtown Manhattan) aren't interested in changing what it is, or trying to make sure new transplants aren't bored.
The entire Triangle is pretty much family friendly suburbia - it is what it is. It's also very diverse. No one will look twice at your kids.
PS - I live in Cary and one of my neighbors lets their dog crap on the sidewalk - right in front of the poop bag-and garbage can-setup provided by the HOA...if I find who out it is, fugeddaboutit.
I agree with twingles, I am not sure why you are looking at this area based on your post. Cary, Apex and Holly Springs are suburbs, they are family friendly but not NYC. There is no mass transportation here, some limited bus service and very few walkable neighborhoods and not walkable like NYC.
This is a great area to live - for a lot of reasons. But, what is most important is what your reasons are and how you define them. For instance - you don't want to drive "far" - define that. You want to stay busy - how? What kind of things do you like to do? If you can answer these questions, we can help point you in the right direction.
For the record - there are a thousand things to do here. It's not NYC, but we have excellent theatres (DPAC, Raleigh Memorial Theatre) with Broadway quality shows, concerts, dance troupes, etc. There is also local theatre at Playmakers at UNC and I'm sure at NC State as well. Big names regularly come to the PNC Arena which is also the home of the Hurricanes (hockey) and NC State basketball.
Sports - wow - you've hit the trifecta of college basketball - UNC, Dook, and NC State. Obviously, you can attend every other imaginable sort at the Universities as well: football, soccer (6 UNC players on the World Cup winning team), baseball, and probably Ultimate Frisbee if you really want. I've already mentioned the Hurricanes and the minor league Durham Bulls baseball team is cheap and fun. If you are willing to travel a little, the Carolina Pathers play a few hours away in Charlotte. You can do it in a day if you want.
Nature and the great outdoors - 1.5-3 hours to the beach depending on where you go. 3 - 5 hours to the mountains - again depending on where you go. Kerr Lake, Lake Jordan, parks, forests, walking trails, biking trails - multiple opportunities in multiple directions.
History and Museums - Marbles, Natural History Museum, Kidzu, and Museum of Life and Science for the kids. Great museums in Greensboro, the Zoo in Asheboro, and Aquariums at the beach make great day trips. There are several art museums around town. There's a good bit of Colonial and Civil War history in the area as well. You are also only 3-4 hours to various points in VA including Williamsburg, Jamestown, Yorktown, Richmond, Charlottesville (Monticello, Ashe Lawn).
There are thousands of restaurants and some are considered the best in the country. If you do a little googling, you can find lists of Triangle restaurants that are critically acclaimed.
What you won't find is all of these things in the same 10 mile block accessible by public transportation. You will need a car, a GPS and a sense of adventure.
Again, give us a little more info of what exactly you are looking for and answer the questions at the top and you will get better answers.
Thanks for the great info everyone. I appreciate the candor and straightforwardness. I don't expect this area to be like NYC. Quite honestly, I'm ready to get out of NYC for more than one reason. It's TOO crowded. I know that I will have to drive to most every place. One of the things I haven't seen down there in any of my visits yet is the presence of mom and pop stores. I see a lot of strip malls and big box stores but no little walkable non-chain areas where you can maybe get a sandwich and do some shopping and talk to someone that doesn't have a name tag on their shirt. Maybe get a beer and hang out in the beer garden and get up and walk to a nice restaurant a few hours later. I'm not asking for Soho here, just maybe a few pockets of non-chain authenticity.
In terms of sports @jojow, I'm glad there are so many pro teams and I've really taken to minor league ball as of late but I was really thinking more in terms of for the kids. I know baseball is big in NC. What else is? My son does judo and MMA right now along with basketball and tennis (and of course baseball). My daughter is about to start sports soon and has an interest in tee ball, gymnastics and martial arts. Are there programs in the school (or after school programs) that have these types of activities? I just want to know how much they will have to adjust. Also, I would like them both in scouts because I belive in the organization and think it's character building.
In terms of walkable, like I said, I know it's not NYC. It would be nice to be able to walk to a corner store and buy some milk or a six pack if needed without jumping in the car. I kinda like doing that. It gives me an excuse to walk around the neighborhood and say hi to the neighbors on the way there and back. Kinda keeps me social.
We are foodies and we do love good restaurants so it's great that they are there. Where are the good clusters of restaurants? Or are they all just spread out?
As you can probably tell, right now, it's all about the kids but my wife and I do have a business to run. We will need to network and we will need to make use of local business services. We'll look to partner with local companies for sure when we get there. Are there certain parts where certain types of businesses tend to clump up or are they all just spread out as well?
Remember, I'm not used to anything but this here so if these questions are outlandish it's because I have nothing to compare it to. When I travel I'm mostly in cities like Chicago, Philly, Boston, Miami, DC, you know what I mean. Suburb life is definitely going to be a change but I'm just trying to see where in that area is will be the least of a change I guess. I'm trying to minimize culture shock to the best of my ability. :-)
You want Durham but didn't mention it - why were Cary, Apex, Holly Springs on your radar first?
What type of business? Take a look at American Underground if it's anything tech related: American Underground
I can't vouch for the Durham schools (no kids) but Durham is really popular and some of those people have children and seem happy!
The closer to downtown the less land you get, but the closer to downtown the more walkable your neighborhood is. Downtown Durham and anywhere walkable near it is getting quite pricey, though certainly not NYC price.
Foodie culture is HUGE here. There are a number of brick and mortar restaurants that started as small food carts/trucks that are very popular, with new ones popping up all the time. Many mom and pop stores too.
I'd equally recommend Chapel Hill, and if you live somewhere between the two (as I do) you can go to both.
Are you looking to buy or rent?
Re. restaurants - there are clusters but there are great restaurants all over the triangle.
Of the OP's three chosen towns, the order of offering what he wants is Cary, Apex, and Holly Springs.
There are certainly many areas of Cary where he can get what he wants, although we have lots of independents working out of strip malls. When a town goes from 5,000 residents to over 150,000 residents in 45 years, it doesn't gain a lot of new old corner stores. It gains plazas. There are plenty of independent restaurants, but most groceries are chains, for sure. Plenty of diversity in dining options without going to a chain/franchise.
Downtown Apex is similar, on a smaller scale. Very walkable in many respects. A bit less restaurant choice, as one would expect in a smaller town.
Holly Springs is booming, and growing, but I would lean towards Cary or Apex.
Sports? We got that. Everywhere. Sports are rampant across western Wake County.
This area offers everything you want for your kids - of course it does - it's suburbia. People in NYC aren't the only ones who have their kids up to their eyeballs in activities. The only thing I don't know anyone involved in is MMA - doesn't mean it doesn't exist though. You can start doing research on this now - my DH did it just by googling around before we moved and getting in touch with the leaders of some organizations. Soccer is huge here (the one sport my kids don't play!). Football Club of Cary (FCCARY) and CASL are the big soccer organizations around here. All of the towns have rec departments. I know several girls heavily involved in gymnastics. BTW if think the uber-parents of the upper West side are overbearing you ain't seen nothing yet!
There are pockets of mom and pop stores here; downtown Apex is really cute (although small) and downtown Cary is undergoing a revitalization. When you were here and only saw big box stores and chains (like almost every other suburb in the US), what part of the area were you in? If you tell us where you were when you saw that, we can give you some context as to what was close by that you missed.
You can definitely find a place to live that is walkable to the store, restaurants, etc. It's just that people nowadays flat-out don't like to walk. My DH walks to the grocery store ALL THE TIME but if people here knew where I lived and heard that they'd be like "What?! how?" It's less than a mile away - not that difficult. We have also gone out to eat and he's walked home afterward with the kids just because they felt like it. It just seems that people are in a hurry nowadays and don't want to spend the time walking for that stuff (like me LOL). I also know kids in my neighborhood that ride their bikes to school on the greenways even though we get bus service.
Beer gardens - there are some beer mavens on this board. I'll defer to them.
You're concerned about your kids and that makes sense. Kids move here all the time - and move around once they're here all the time. The kids are used to new kids coming in all throughout the school year. It's a complete non-issue to be the "new kid". It will certainly seem different to them moving from NYC. The biggest change for my kids was that everything was brand new and so much nicer than Long Island. Now when we go back they're like "why is everything here so smelly and dirty?!"
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