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It's fabulous Of course, the majority of UNC "fans" know more about the aisles of Wal-Mart in which they purchase their bandwagon apparel than EC 101, but I'll try to veer back on topic before this gets outta hand
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As you can see here, NC State fans really do hate carolina (UNC CH) fans......funny, the UNC CH fans don't hate state all that much......but I digress!
Anyhow, I would also suggest wake forest, you will get all of the "things" you need here (grocery, target, home depot, restaurants, doctors, preschool, good public schools) and you are 20 minutes from triangle town center mall, plus the lot size you are looking for. 10 Years ago wake forest was considered more "out in the country" and people who live in the southern part of wake county (holly springs where you looked) would also think that (wake forest is about 45 minutes from holly springs). I have found that I don't need to go outside of wake forest for much, and it is very family friendly. My brother in law and sister live in wake forest as well and he works from home. It is a good situation to be in!
We did not make it into Wake Forest. I would like to in my next visit. Any good areas to look at or is it all good? Any lakes or such to live on? I would love to live on a lake.
We just moved into Morrisville . . .I wouldn't rule out looking at a couple of the neighborhoods here! We have been here for a month and I love it. It only takes me 5 minutes to get to the grocery store, and less than 5 to take my daughter to school and my son to preschool. Also, two great shopping areas/malls are closer than I imagined they would be. Our neighborhood has small lots, but there is another one nearby offering lots in your size range. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions!
I think you'll love Holly Springs. It has or is within 20 minutes of what you need (stores, malls, etc.). As far as every day conveniences (grocery, cvs), NC is the land of strip malls. That is one thing that amazed me when we moved here. Every intersection has a strip mall so I dont think you have to worry about having grocery stores nearby where ever you decide to live.
The thing that made us decide on Holly Springs is we got more house/land for our money. Like you mentioned....we wanted to be near malls, etc but not actually live in that town. Being 20 minutes from the mall was perfect. Also with Holly Springs you have Fuquay right down the street which has a lot to offer (i.e. the CLOSEST DUNKIN DONUTS) as well as Super Target, Applebees, Hallmark store, etc.
We just found that in Holly Springs we got the community feel we wanted with all those big city things just 20 minutes away. We have school age kids and I have found the moms in our neighborhood/school very friendly and welcoming. I think the community pool is a great way to meet people.
You mentioned the Atlantic....where are you coming from?
Another thing that came to mind......the Holly Springs YMCA has a great pool. If you choose Holly Springs, joining the HS YMCA might be a great way to meet people from outside your subdivison and it has a pool slide. We have a pool in our neighborhood (no slide though) and we met a lot of people at the pool and activities our neighborhood has at the pool but had we not had this pool in our subdivision, I think we would have joined the Y pool.
I would ask at the sales office of the subdivisions you visit what kind of activities/functions the neighborhood has or if they have a residents website you could check out. I think the activities of the neighborhood will give you a good feel on the feel of the neighborhood. I told my husband when we moved here I had never seen so many moms walking baby carriages in one place in my entire life! Must be good water down here!
Good luck with your search. When are you hoping to be settled in NC by?
We did not make it into Wake Forest. I would like to in my next visit. Any good areas to look at or is it all good? Any lakes or such to live on? I would love to live on a lake.
The northern part of wake county (close to wake forest) has falls lake. There are no lakes in the area where you can live (they are all state owned) but we use the lake regularly in the spring and summer. In wake forest, falls lake access for us is about 10 minutes, which is perfect. They have lots of picnic areas, a couple of "beaches" where you can anchor your boat, etc. It is a very nice lake.
I won't harp on this, but the hordes of UNC fans who were silenced after our game with them a few weeks back @ Raleigh was just golden. They say they don't care, but when they lose, oh, they care.
You need to go with sunset ridge in Holly Springs. You will make plenty of friends their. They have probably the best schools, pool and slide, kids all over the place, lots 400-600K homes. It really is not far away from everything either.
Thats my opinion.
I am a tar Heel...and I do not hate the Wolfpack at all. We hate Duke
Well I'll do something predictable for those who know me (since no one else has done it yet) and suggest taking a look at homes Inside-The-Betline (ITB) of Raleigh.
Things you listed:
1- Schools..some of the best in Wake County, especially the magnets. Also less overcrowding and reassignment/shuffling here since the area is mostly already-developed.
2- Great neighborhoods...absolutely. Very friendly folks and you have a lot of long-time residents who have invested their time and efforts in their community...not just newcomers like in most of suburbia. A real sense of community.
3 - Most lots in the nicer neighborhoods will be well over half an acre.
4- Plenty of public pools...some are even indoors and open year-round.
5- 4 bedrooms in the 400 ranges are very very common.
6- Trees...lots of them. I tend to think ITB Raleigh is even better wooded than most of the outlying parts, because the people here really make them a priority. You'll see a neighborhood literally be a forest and be amazed it's less than half a mile from downtown.
7- Side walks are common...and near things, definitely! That's the main appeal here.
just curoius...what schools (elemen, ms, hs) do the kids in sunset ridge go to? are they year round or traditional?
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Of course, the majority of UNC "fans" know more about the aisles of Wal-Mart in which they purchase their bandwagon apparel than EC 101, but I'll try to veer back on topic before this gets outta hand 
