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I am always amazed at what people choose to share on facebook. My SIL who proudly admits she does not understand technology joined facebook a while back. She has her profile set to public so her wall, photos, profile...everything can be seen by anyone. She is a school teacher and when she listed her school she horribly misspelled it. She actually wrote Pubic meaning Public. The city is completely misspelled and after working there 11 yrs, you would think she would be able to spell it correctly. It saddens me she teaches children.
Anyway, she has been a problem for me over the years. She has caused some grief between me, my husband and his family. My husband got tired of her crap and cut off most of his contact with her. This was the norm for about 6 yrs. Recently she has extended an olive branch for some reason and has become overly friendly towards me. It was a visit DH and I made back home to see family. So it was just a one time deal so far. My in-laws are pleased and my husband admitted he is too as the constant discord got tiresome. I would also like things to work out but after 20 years of constant bull crap, I feel like everyone is ignoring the white elephant in the room. I would consider this more seriously if she had taken me aside and we discussed the issues and got it off the table. But that is not her style. In all the years I have known her, she has never said sorry or admitted she was wrong about anything. My SIL sent me a friend request on facebook which surprised me and I accepted to go along with this new nicey nice attitude since everyone seems so pleased. I can forgive but I do not forget so I am proceeding with great caution. She has not said anything to me on facebook. I attempted to have a small conversation with her on there but she never replied. I personally feel she decided to be nice to me because she felt it would give her an in back into her brother's life.
So like I said she is completely public on facebook and I know its because she has no idea how to make herself private. She has recently been discussing her children's issues on her wall. Both of her kids have problems and she discusses this openly on her page. I finally mentioned it to my husband and he suggested that maybe I should send her a message letting her know (he doesnt really know how facebook works). I do not think its my place and he thought about calling her himself. So far he has not. Everyone kind of walks on egg shells around my SIL because she is temper mental. I figure the facebook thing is her problem. But when I see she makes a new post, I think that maybe I should say something. So just curious what would you do? Be the bigger person and let her know or sit back and watch her make an arse out of herself?
I have a nutzoid relative who thinks himself to be a computer genius of sorts. Please trust me, he's not... he got his first computer 2 years ago, put up one of the most godawful websites you've ever seen (think of the kind of thing you'd have found on Geocities 12+ years ago) and now styles himself as some sort of guru.
He "discovered" Facebook a few months back. Told several of us (all of whom work in IT fields) once he realized we had accounts, that he was surprised we'd heard of it before him. He has his finger on the pulse of new tech, don'cha know.
Anyway, same thing, Facebook page wide open to everyone. Posting ridiculously personal information for all the world to see. He works "in politics." I don't know how to describe it better than that - but he does some sort of obscure something-or-another for several of his local political candidates and organizations. No one in the family is actually quite sure "what" he does. LOL But some of what he had on his Facebook page, comments he was making directed at other family/friends, could actually make the people and organizations he works for look pretty bad. That would get him fired, cause grief for his wife and kids (who actually are good people and don't deserve that) and just generally be problematic.
You can't tell this guy anything. Either he tunes you out, or he goes on a tirade about how much more he knows about XYZ than anyone else. He's also vindictive and has a way of punishing OTHER relatives to hurt YOU. Yeah, crazy.
So... we created a few bogus profiles... and started commenting on his postings. Letting him come to the realization himself that strangers were seeing everything he wrote, and implying that we would use the information he'd shared to assist his current candidate's opponent.
His FB is now locked up tight.
No one will be surprised to hear that several days later, we all got a very lecturing email from him condescendingly explaining to us how FB privacy settings work and how important it is that we make sure our FB accounts were locked down so that nothing WE post will reflect badly on him or his political associates.
But at least his kids no longer have to deal with their embarrassing moments (like discussing the dog snagging an old maxi out of the garbage ) being broadcast to any of their classmates who were savvy enough to find their dad's FB account.
I'd "hide" her status updates so I don't have to read them and forget about it. Something tells me she'll freak out if you say something - if she's really as mental as you say, she'll probably take it as an insult. You admit you think she is making a fool of herself and that will likely come across to her and a big argument will result. Not worth it.
My Facebook rule is: Don't post drama and don't get involved in it when someone else does. People say Facebook causes so many problems but it's never once been an issue for me because I stick to my rule.
For the sake of her kids I would send her a private message and tell her there is an option to make certain or all information private. Throw in something about pedophiles reading info on children making them easy targets, that way she might not take it as you being critical.
So like I said she is completely public on facebook and I know its because she has no idea how to make herself private. She has recently been discussing her children's issues on her wall. Both of her kids have problems and she discusses this openly on her page. I finally mentioned it to my husband and he suggested that maybe I should send her a message letting her know (he doesnt really know how facebook works). I do not think its my place and he thought about calling her himself. So far he has not. Everyone kind of walks on egg shells around my SIL because she is temper mental. I figure the facebook thing is her problem. But when I see she makes a new post, I think that maybe I should say something. So just curious what would you do? Be the bigger person and let her know or sit back and watch her make an arse out of herself?
She is your husband's sister. Therefore, she's family. I think for you to not offer to help her, makes YOU the arse, not her. For the childrens's sakes at least, go over there and educate her on FB privacy settings. Teach a man to fish, or at least offer.
I'd "hide" her status updates so I don't have to read them and forget about it. Something tells me she'll freak out if you say something - if she's really as mental as you say, she'll probably take it as an insult. You admit you think she is making a fool of herself and that will likely come across to her and a big argument will result. Not worth it.
My Facebook rule is: Don't post drama and don't get involved in it when someone else does. People say Facebook causes so many problems but it's never once been an issue for me because I stick to my rule.
Ding ding ding. This is the answer! You treat FB in the exact same manner as I, and yup, I have never had a facebook problem either. (I have plenty of people hidden for this very reason.)
I am always amazed at what people choose to share on facebook. My SIL who proudly admits she does not understand technology joined facebook a while back. She has her profile set to public so her wall, photos, profile...everything can be seen by anyone. She is a school teacher and when she listed her school she horribly misspelled it. She actually wrote Pubic meaning Public. The city is completely misspelled and after working there 11 yrs, you would think she would be able to spell it correctly. It saddens me she teaches children.
Anyway, she has been a problem for me over the years. She has caused some grief between me, my husband and his family. My husband got tired of her crap and cut off most of his contact with her. This was the norm for about 6 yrs. Recently she has extended an olive branch for some reason and has become overly friendly towards me. It was a visit DH and I made back home to see family. So it was just a one time deal so far. My in-laws are pleased and my husband admitted he is too as the constant discord got tiresome. I would also like things to work out but after 20 years of constant bull crap, I feel like everyone is ignoring the white elephant in the room. I would consider this more seriously if she had taken me aside and we discussed the issues and got it off the table. But that is not her style. In all the years I have known her, she has never said sorry or admitted she was wrong about anything. My SIL sent me a friend request on facebook which surprised me and I accepted to go along with this new nicey nice attitude since everyone seems so pleased. I can forgive but I do not forget so I am proceeding with great caution. She has not said anything to me on facebook. I attempted to have a small conversation with her on there but she never replied. I personally feel she decided to be nice to me because she felt it would give her an in back into her brother's life.
So like I said she is completely public on facebook and I know its because she has no idea how to make herself private. She has recently been discussing her children's issues on her wall. Both of her kids have problems and she discusses this openly on her page. I finally mentioned it to my husband and he suggested that maybe I should send her a message letting her know (he doesnt really know how facebook works). I do not think its my place and he thought about calling her himself. So far he has not. Everyone kind of walks on egg shells around my SIL because she is temper mental. I figure the facebook thing is her problem. But when I see she makes a new post, I think that maybe I should say something. So just curious what would you do? Be the bigger person and let her know or sit back and watch her make an arse out of herself?
For the CHILDREN'S SAKE, I think you should explain to her how the privacy settings work. It amazes me the amount of people who don't know how it works. I have read some wild stuff on people's pages just from being linked to their page from one of MY FB friends. Business is WIDE OPEN. My BFF is one of them. I told her, but she doesn't seem to care.
For the CHILDREN'S SAKE, I think you should explain to her how the privacy settings work. It amazes me the amount of people who don't know how it works. I have read some wild stuff on people's pages just from being linked to their page from one of MY FB friends. Business is WIDE OPEN. My BFF is one of them. I told her, but she doesn't seem to care.
LittleMizz, you just touched on one of the EXACT reasons the Captain doesn't bother with Facebook---I do NOT need a bunch of folks waist deep in my business!
And like you, I am also amazed at the number of folk who think FB is the greatest thing since disposable diapers, and yet have no clue whatsoever as to it's inner workings---then get totally off the chain when their 'laundry' gets aired in public, on the Net...simply amazing...
(Sidebar...once upon a time, the Captain was a member of Soul-Pitt, and from reading your posts here, you remind me so much of a favorite lady poster of mine on that forum...as Flip Wilson would have said 'do da name Keyootie ring a familiar bell? )
So just curious what would you do? Be the bigger person and let her know or sit back and watch her make an arse out of herself?
Just tell her. I don't enjoy watching people unknowingly make an arse out of themselves and I assume you don't either.
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) being broadcast to any of their classmates who were savvy enough to find their dad's FB account.
Can The Thread Say---Amen??!!
)
