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I've just read this whole thread - too funny - but thought to add a little story of my own.
I have NEVER been a gold digger, for a start, although I've met hundreds of them (female variety.) Throughout my life I've enjoyed a combination of lifestyles from being generally well-off to being very poor. I have my own business which seems to mean to some casual observers that ergo I must be well-off, which is FAR from the truth. I keep a roof over my head, live very simply and enjoy what I do.
That said, I became a little confused when, a few years ago, a customer who was more than 20 years my junior seemed to be taking more than a casual interest in me. He would stare at me while I was working, make jokes, said that he could see how hard I worked and offered me a massage on one of my days off. He wasn't a bad chap, seemed quite a likeable young man but, as his attention persisted, and he started mentioning massages and candlelight, I started to feel a little uncomfortable. I was old enough to be his mother! OH DUH, it of course suddenly hit me that he was hitting on me. I immediately cooled off the chit-chat, remained polite and cheery but careful not to project any signals which could be misinterpreted, and he soon disappeared.
To this day I've no doubt whatsoever that my charm, friendliness and intelligence (!) was much less of a draw than the fact that I owned a business from which he thought he could benefit. Thanks for bringing back a little memory which gives me a chuckle. Cheers!
No offense to anyone but don't you think that some of this is brought on by people themselves?
If you are an older man and only date 20 year olds, do you think they are in it for your 'wit' and 'personality?'
Of course there is the occasional May December romance that is based on love, but more likely it's 'what can you do for me?'
Historically younger women married older men for security.
The guy got a female who (hopefully) would provide him with sons to carry on the family name. The girl got security & a nice home & made a good marriage. (whatever that was).
I've just read this whole thread - too funny - but thought to add a little story of my own.
I have NEVER been a gold digger, for a start, although I've met hundreds of them (female variety.) Throughout my life I've enjoyed a combination of lifestyles from being generally well-off to being very poor. I have my own business which seems to mean to some casual observers that ergo I must be well-off, which is FAR from the truth. I keep a roof over my head, live very simply and enjoy what I do.
That said, I became a little confused when, a few years ago, a customer who was more than 20 years my junior seemed to be taking more than a casual interest in me. He would stare at me while I was working, make jokes, said that he could see how hard I worked and offered me a massage on one of my days off. He wasn't a bad chap, seemed quite a likeable young man but, as his attention persisted, and he started mentioning massages and candlelight, I started to feel a little uncomfortable. I was old enough to be his mother! OH DUH, it of course suddenly hit me that he was hitting on me. I immediately cooled off the chit-chat, remained polite and cheery but careful not to project any signals which could be misinterpreted, and he soon disappeared.
To this day I've no doubt whatsoever that my charm, friendliness and intelligence (!) was much less of a draw than the fact that I owned a business from which he thought he could benefit. Thanks for bringing back a little memory which gives me a chuckle. Cheers!
absolutely a humorous and heartwarming story. Thank you for sharing. yanno, it seems to me, you are a lot like my mother was...very charming, and a people magnet...unfortunately, like you say, comes along some stragglers who think they are going to take advantage of your good nature...well, Lady, Kudos to you...and my best in all you do...thank you for sharing. Your getting reps from me.
No offense to anyone but don't you think that some of this is brought on by people themselves?
If you are an older man and only date 20 year olds, do you think they are in it for your 'wit' and 'personality?'
Of course there is the occasional May December romance that is based on love, but more likely it's 'what can you do for me?'
Historically younger women married older men for security.
The guy got a female who (hopefully) would provide him with sons to carry on the family name. The girl got security & a nice home & made a good marriage. (whatever that was).
Yes, you are absolutely right...and the same with my DIL....I know she enjoys what my son gives her, or believe you me, she would not be there. But in the same, my son, really does need counseling to figure out why he's compromised everything and every one for her. I cannot believe it is simply her outward beauty, there is some reason why he to is co-dependent on her. And I intend, if the day ever comes, to stand my ground and tell him, and her, they are not allowed back in my life, u ntil they gain some very stringent counseling, and I do mean...long term. The hurt that they both have inflicted, is irrepairable...sheesh, I cannot express in words...and all because, she is a gold digger...she uses him and he is so stupid, works 3 jobs, and she hardly works at all, and if she does, she spends more then she makes...doesn't help him out in the least, and she buys, buys, buys....and her daughter is growing up to be just like her????? She will not socialize properly or realize, there are many other opportunities other then cloths, make up, looking good and finding a man who will take care of her. My son does everything...I can't imagine what he is going thru? He's given up everything...all hobbies, has no time to himself...shops, does laundry, etc.
I'm sorry but I fail to see the humor in this situation, like some of you do. I guess it's because I am directly effected by this...humor or not, I think the main issue that we as human beings here are forgetting....how, our behavior, effects so many other people. Our decissions, our words, our anger, our selfishness and self absorbtion, always has an effect on others..negatively...and I also believe very strongly, if you harm someone's karma, it will someday come back and hit you right between the eyes...if you effect someone's karma in a good way, then, you to will be at peace.
If not, guilt can rip your heart out. Unfortunately, most of these gold diggers have no conscience. Sad....and harmful
I've just read this whole thread - too funny - but thought to add a little story of my own.
I have NEVER been a gold digger, for a start, although I've met hundreds of them (female variety.) Throughout my life I've enjoyed a combination of lifestyles from being generally well-off to being very poor. I have my own business which seems to mean to some casual observers that ergo I must be well-off, which is FAR from the truth. I keep a roof over my head, live very simply and enjoy what I do.
That said, I became a little confused when, a few years ago, a customer who was more than 20 years my junior seemed to be taking more than a casual interest in me. He would stare at me while I was working, make jokes, said that he could see how hard I worked and offered me a massage on one of my days off. He wasn't a bad chap, seemed quite a likeable young man but, as his attention persisted, and he started mentioning massages and candlelight, I started to feel a little uncomfortable. I was old enough to be his mother! OH DUH, it of course suddenly hit me that he was hitting on me. I immediately cooled off the chit-chat, remained polite and cheery but careful not to project any signals which could be misinterpreted, and he soon disappeared.
To this day I've no doubt whatsoever that my charm, friendliness and intelligence (!) was much less of a draw than the fact that I owned a business from which he thought he could benefit. Thanks for bringing back a little memory which gives me a chuckle. Cheers!
Do you really think it totally impossible that a man 20 years your junior would be only attracted to you for your money? Is that the way you view all age gap relationships? That the younger person is only attracted to the older person's money?
Do you really think it totally impossible that a man 20 years your junior would be only attracted to you for your money? Is that the way you view all age gap relationships? That the younger person is only attracted to the older person's money?
MIU...I don't believe she is viewing this as you think...the thread though is about gold diggers only, and not a fact that all men/women, who date someone younger then themselves....do so, to be taken care of...but...there are a lot of people who do. As well as those who do not.
So, I wouldn't take it personal or like she is addressing all those who are dating someone way younger and/or older then themselves.
I would also like to add, that there are emotional gold diggers as well...people who feel they have to be with someone or they will not be able to make it on their own, it's called co-dependency, but that would be another thread.
Just my 2 cents.
Creme
Last edited by cremebrulee; 11-08-2007 at 07:40 AM..
You are quite correct, cremebrulee. MIU, I don't want to get into the age and wisdom repartee at this point but age has never been relevant in relationships where I'm concerned. When I was young I generally dated men older than I but that's pretty much to be expected because, as a younger woman it's pretty much "de rigeur" to date those of the same age or older. As I got older, age became of less relevance and I dated men younger than I with the biggest age difference being 12 years and both relationships I look back upon with as much fondness as I look back on relationships with men older than I. I am SUCH a bad judge of age, even though I'm continually surrounded by people of all ages, colours and creeds and, upon further thought, this young man was probably 25-30 years younger than I at the time. Does that make my story better to your taste?
Life experiences are well worth sharing in anecdotal form and that's the way, in the old days, life's lessons were handed down. In days gone by (but still evident in different cultures in different parts of the world and even sometimes in America!) the conversations took place in communal gatherings. Tales would be told around the gathering place, stories would be written down and thus even in the case of human relationships, history was talked about, some were written down and many have survived to prove that the angst suffered then was the same angst which prevails today.
Now I'm going to sound like an old fogey by noting that so many of today's generation is overly fixed on material trappings. Mainstream TV fosters an abundance of misconceptions all balled up into a proscribed time slot.
Life deals some major shots and devastation to many but you can either learn from those shots or spend the rest of your life bemoaning your fate. Life is short and, the older you get, the more you realize that. The internet, and forums such as these, afford many different people from many dfferent walks of life an opportunity to express themseles and offer their opinions via a medium which wasn't dreamed of during my formative years.
Seems to me that a whole bunch of people are more intent on seeing their profiles on forums and revelling in the cyberspace exposure than actually making the effort to sit down and talk to family members, children and friends face-to-face over dinner!
OK, I have probably stirred up the pot and now I must get to my chores! Thanks again, cremebrulee. Cheers!
You are quite correct, cremebrulee. MIU, I don't want to get into the age and wisdom repartee at this point but age has never been relevant in relationships where I'm concerned. When I was young I generally dated men older than I but that's pretty much to be expected because, as a younger woman it's pretty much "de rigeur" to date those of the same age or older. As I got older, age became of less relevance and I dated men younger than I with the biggest age difference being 12 years and both relationships I look back upon with as much fondness as I look back on relationships with men older than I. I am SUCH a bad judge of age, even though I'm continually surrounded by people of all ages, colours and creeds and, upon further thought, this young man was probably 25-30 years younger than I at the time. Does that make my story better to your taste?
Life experiences are well worth sharing in anecdotal form and that's the way, in the old days, life's lessons were handed down. In days gone by (but still evident in different cultures in different parts of the world and even sometimes in America!) the conversations took place in communal gatherings. Tales would be told around the gathering place, stories would be written down and thus even in the case of human relationships, history was talked about, some were written down and many have survived to prove that the angst suffered then was the same angst which prevails today.
Now I'm going to sound like an old fogey by noting that so many of today's generation is overly fixed on material trappings. Mainstream TV fosters an abundance of misconceptions all balled up into a proscribed time slot.
Life deals some major shots and devastation to many but you can either learn from those shots or spend the rest of your life bemoaning your fate. Life is short and, the older you get, the more you realize that. The internet, and forums such as these, afford many different people from many dfferent walks of life an opportunity to express themseles and offer their opinions via a medium which wasn't dreamed of during my formative years.
Seems to me that a whole bunch of people are more intent on seeing their profiles on forums and revelling in the cyberspace exposure than actually making the effort to sit down and talk to family members, children and friends face-to-face over dinner!
OK, I have probably stirred up the pot and now I must get to my chores! Thanks again, cremebrulee. Cheers!
You sound exactly like my aunt...your post was purely inspirational...especially this....
Seems to me that a whole bunch of people are more intent on seeing their profiles on forums and revelling in the cyberspace exposure than actually making the effort to sit down and talk to family members, children and friends face-to-face over dinner!
I hear ya...and wish, so much that could have been done...especially from where I sit....
Kudos to you, as well, and no, you have not stirred up the pot, and if you did, point well taken....thanks so much for your post...please if you can and will, return...
MIU...I don't believe she is viewing this as you think...the thread though is about gold diggers only, and not a fact that all men/women, who date someone younger then themselves....do so, to be taken care of...but...there are a lot of people who do. As well as those who do not.
So, I wouldn't take it personal or like she is addressing all those who are dating someone way younger and/or older then themselves.
I would also like to add, that there are emotional gold diggers as well...people who feel they have to be with someone or they will not be able to make it on their own, it's called co-dependency, but that would be another thread.
Just my 2 cents.
Creme
I just didn't want her to sell herself short as an attractive woman. That's all.
I just didn't want her to sell herself short as an attractive woman. That's all.
I don't believe she did, but this was a beautiful post and your a dear...hugs rightbackatcha....
creme
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