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I need help so I'm gonna pour my heart here hopefully someone can give some advice:
I'm 25 and only now I have my first girlfriend, the problem with me is I'm really shy and I have a really particular taste in girls so it's hard for me to find girls I actually like.
so what's my problem?
well I have been dating this girl for 3 months , I first thought we clicked but the thing about her is that she's really cold, really cold, she doesn't share her emotions with me ever, and she doesn't act physically as well..I tried telling her many times, many fights, I broke up with her but came crawling a day later.. I don't know what to do.. it took me alot of time to find a girl I like and I as just wish she would care for me and show me emotions and love.. I don't want to break up because then I'm really sad about it, who knows if I'll ever find a girl again..I don't know what to do.. I tried everything but she's just colder and colder and still want to be together it's really weird.. it's like it's her nature... (I'm her first as well)
I don't know if she's with me just to have a boyfriend or she's just really cold and I need work to get her to love me.. please help me
If you have to work so hard to to keep a GF like your doing, I would rather be single.
Is she mean to you? Why so cold? This isn`t what having a relationship, or GF is all about. I would tell her the way you feel, and move on!
I need help so I'm gonna pour my heart here hopefully someone can give some advice:
I'm 25 and only now I have my first girlfriend, the problem with me is I'm really shy and I have a really particular taste in girls so it's hard for me to find girls I actually like.
so what's my problem?
well I have been dating this girl for 3 months , I first thought we clicked but the thing about her is that she's really cold, really cold, she doesn't share her emotions with me ever, and she doesn't act physically as well..I tried telling her many times, many fights, I broke up with her but came crawling a day later.. I don't know what to do.. it took me alot of time to find a girl I like and I as just wish she would care for me and show me emotions and love.. I don't want to break up because then I'm really sad about it, who knows if I'll ever find a girl again..I don't know what to do.. I tried everything but she's just colder and colder and still want to be together it's really weird.. it's like it's her nature... (I'm her first as well)
I don't know if she's with me just to have a boyfriend or she's just really cold and I need work to get her to love me.. please help me
Ask yourself a hard question...why would you find such a cold, very cold person even remotely appealing???
Quit trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. She may have some qualities you generally admire, but who she is, is who she is.
If showing love and emotion is important to you then she's not the one for you - plain and simple.
And don't be melodramatic, you'll find another girl if you are willing to do what it takes to find one - she is far from the only girl in the whole world for you.
I need help so I'm gonna pour my heart here hopefully someone can give some advice:
I'm 25 and only now I have my first girlfriend, the problem with me is I'm really shy and I have a really particular taste in girls so it's hard for me to find girls I actually like.
so what's my problem?
well I have been dating this girl for 3 months , I first thought we clicked but the thing about her is that she's really cold, really cold, she doesn't share her emotions with me ever, and she doesn't act physically as well..I tried telling her many times, many fights, I broke up with her but came crawling a day later.. I don't know what to do.. it took me alot of time to find a girl I like and I as just wish she would care for me and show me emotions and love.. I don't want to break up because then I'm really sad about it, who knows if I'll ever find a girl again..I don't know what to do.. I tried everything but she's just colder and colder and still want to be together it's really weird.. it's like it's her nature... (I'm her first as well)
I don't know if she's with me just to have a boyfriend or she's just really cold and I need work to get her to love me.. please help me
Your story is not uncommon. Here are some tips that will keep you sane and allow you to leave the door cracked. 1. If you are a strong physical representation of her parents, then you are on first base. 2. People hate change--a new relationship takes work. People have this notion life is easy it is not. 3. You have to set boundaries in relationships. Women need to know that you are tough and mean what you'll say even it means you'll walk. Trust and security are at play. 4. Cultivate a sense of integrity and dignity despite everything you've heard about traditional men. You must have male-strength outlets that ground you and bolster your sense of wellness. Guard your mind against anything that strikes down your sense of masculinity. Trust me I know what I'm talking about. Learn to be a gentleman (a nice guy with the ability to set boundaries--women see this as a backbone and respect it). 5. Don't date her if she's got weak boundaries especially with sex. This may sound like a hard pill to swallow. You have to be able to put this objective aside yourself and look at character first. If you get time in with her and demonstrate self-control, your value shoots through the roof, you feel better about yourself, and you can be a better provider. 6. Don't grovel. State your case and walk if needed. Budget for the termination (or sepearation period). Pretend it will feel like the flu, but be determined not to call or check up on her. Conconcurrently plan to move on with your life. If you give in to groveling, you will lose her. She has to see your value. Good luck
Your story is not uncommon. Here are some tips that will keep you sane and allow you to leave the door cracked. 1. If you are a strong physical representation of her parents, then you are on first base. 2. People hate change--a new relationship takes work. People have this notion life is easy it is not. 3. You have to set boundaries in relationships. Women need to know that you are tough and mean what you'll say even it means you'll walk. Trust and security are at play. 4. Cultivate a sense of integrity and dignity despite everything you've heard about traditional men. You must have male-strength outlets that ground you and bolster your sense of wellness. Guard your mind against anything that strikes down your sense of masculinity. Trust me I know what I'm talking about. Learn to be a gentleman (a nice guy with the ability to set boundaries--women see this as a backbone and respect it). 5. Don't date her if she's got weak boundaries especially with sex. This may sound like a hard pill to swallow. You have to be able to put this objective aside yourself and look at character first. If you get time in with her and demonstrate self-control, your value shoots through the roof, you feel better about yourself, and you can be a better provider. 6. Don't grovel. State your case and walk if needed. Budget for the termination (or sepearation period). Pretend it will feel like the flu, but be determined not to call or check up on her. Conconcurrently plan to move on with your life. If you give in to groveling, you will lose her. She has to see your value. Good luck
Well thought out - I gotta say, I agree
Kynz, I know this is hard for you, but hang in there and keep going after what you want in life!
The hard truth of the reallity is I know you are right, but I've been alone for so long that it sucks and scary being so again.
Kynz, You're 25.... you haven't been alone for "so long". You're just beginning your adult life and I can promise you as someone old enough to be your mother, that this is the time you should spend finding someone that's perfect... someone that makes you feel like a million bucks. Someone you can respect, laugh with, enjoy physically (not describe as cold), and become your best friend. If this young lady isn't doing those things, I PROMISE you there's someone that will. Don't settle. It will never make you happy in the long run.
I need help so I'm gonna pour my heart here hopefully someone can give some advice:
I'm 25 and only now I have my first girlfriend, the problem with me is I'm really shy and I have a really particular taste in girls so it's hard for me to find girls I actually like.
so what's my problem?
well I have been dating this girl for 3 months , I first thought we clicked but the thing about her is that she's really cold, really cold, she doesn't share her emotions with me ever, and she doesn't act physically as well..I tried telling her many times, many fights, I broke up with her but came crawling a day later.. I don't know what to do.. it took me alot of time to find a girl I like and I as just wish she would care for me and show me emotions and love.. I don't want to break up because then I'm really sad about it, who knows if I'll ever find a girl again..I don't know what to do.. I tried everything but she's just colder and colder and still want to be together it's really weird.. it's like it's her nature... (I'm her first as well)
I don't know if she's with me just to have a boyfriend or she's just really cold and I need work to get her to love me.. please help me
She told you you were her FIRST?!?
red flags red flags red flags
You get the rookie of the year award man.
Women are never cold to guys they REALLY LIKE. dump this broad an move on. Matter of fact duke. Love Yourself. Show yourself some love. If you dont love yourself man chicks aint gonna love ya either. Peace.
Do you know why she's cold or acts cold in the first place? I mean it could be her past that makes her who she is today...I was once cold because of my past and it shaped my views of life, friends, and relationships. It's tough but be patient and be willing. I think that if you are patient and honest, then she's willing to accept that you are determined and you do want to be with her. Perhaps she'll soften up later? If it happened to me, then it could happen to her as well.
Oh yeah, cliche but don't force her to be touchy and be lovely-dovey with you... Honestly, it was gross and annoying (for me) when my friends kept doing that to me.
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