Are getting lap dances cheating? (dating, wife, girlfriends, married)
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This is a debate that I’ve had with several men in the past and I’m curious to hear what all of you have to say…If I guy is dating someone exclusively or married, is it ok for him to go to a strip club and get a lap dance? For those of you who have not been to a strip club, not only does a lap dance consist of a naked woman gyrating in front of the guy but they often touch the guy all over and the guy can often touch/lick/fondle the girl, as well.
And how do you feel about bachelor parties? If the groom’s friends get him strippers and they are naked, grinding on him, touching, etc. is this ok?
I would prefer that guys didn’t go to strip clubs if I’m dating them but if they do, I would only want them to look and not touch and not get touched in any way because I do consider that cheating. What do you think?
I guess it depends on your moral standards.............. personally I would be furious and would consider it cheating if my SO were licking, fondling, and gyrating against another woman. Although I don't mind if they visit the clubs and have even been known to go along on occasion.
To get that sort of experience, he would have risked losing me. I never went in for dummies.
Maybe it's my ego speaking, but if he went to get his jollies that way, that would have been it. I made it very plain when he brought home a Playboy magazine, "you want to get excited? Come to bed. You don't get excited from picture and then expect me to finish up the job."
Cheating?? It's more like Downright Stupidity if you ask me.
No, I wouldn't consider it cheating. How do you define cheating, anyhow? I define it as taking part in a sex act with someone else. That means masturbating is not cheating, either. And looking at other women is not cheating, nor is talking with other women.
What happens in a lap dance is a form of erotic entertainment. It is not sex, it is paid-for, and it is a form of fantasy. But there is no personal relationship... no emotional investment or anything like that.
That said, I think it is understandable if a woman doesn't want to be involved with a guy who likes going to strip clubs and/or getting a lap dance. While I don't think it's cheating, I do think a woman can set her own standards in what she will accept in a partner... and if she doesn't want one who likes the clubs or other forms of erotic entertainment, especially hands-on erotic entertainment, I think she has every right to demand that in a partner. She does not have the right to demand that from any partner, however. So if a guy really feels entitled to go to a strip club and get a lap dance, I can see how some women would consider that a deal-breaker. But it is not "cheating". It would be sub-standard behavior according to her standards. And everyone has a right to set their own standards. If a particular person can't live up to those standards, then that person becomes a throw-back and it's time to find a guy who doesn't want to do the strip clubs in the first place.
Absolutely! Without a doubt... as is going to a club to get aroused, looking at porn, thinking about someone else when you are having sex.... even if it is with yourself! As is sharing confidence with anyone other than your spouse.. i.e. phone sex, cyber sex, having long lunches with someone of the oppisite sex that you are attracted to at work... I would even go as far as to say flirting with the intent to get someone interested in you is cheating.
No, I wouldn't consider it cheating. How do you define cheating, anyhow? I define it as taking part in a sex act with someone else. That means masturbating is not cheating, either. And looking at other women is not cheating, nor is talking with other women.
I disagree that a lap dance is not a sex act. You're right--it is not intercourse but the guy does sometimes have an orgasm or is brought nearly to that point and it's definitely sexual no matter how you look at it.
So, do you think it is ok for your girlfriend/wife to pay a guy for him to rub her through her clothes, get sexual enjoyment out of it and touch him all over? That's not cheating? Is it ok if your girlfriend is hanging out with her male friend who she finds attractive and she masturbates with him the room but he doesn't touch her? And I don't see what difference it makes whether it was paid for or not. It's still getting some sort of sexual gratification from someone who is not your significant other.
There are several ways you can look at it, but for me I base my opinion on my faith. God said that to even think of someone in an inappropriate way is considered adultry, without even touching them. Do we as humans do this, of course, we are with sin.
If you are having someone naked in front of you or anything along those lines it is sin. You may not be touching but it does not matter.
This is just my opinion, but if you look it up in the bible it is very true. (the book of Matthew).
I disagree that a lap dance is not a sex act. You're right--it is not intercourse but the guy does sometimes have an orgasm or is brought nearly to that point and it's definitely sexual no matter how you look at it.
So, do you think it is ok for your girlfriend/wife to pay a guy for him to rub her through her clothes, get sexual enjoyment out of it and touch him all over? That's not cheating? Is it ok if your girlfriend is hanging out with her male friend who she finds attractive and she masturbates with him the room but he doesn't touch her? And I don't see what difference it makes whether it was paid for or not. It's still getting some sort of sexual gratification from someone who is not your significant other.
No, I wouldn't consider any of that "cheating". But I would consider my girlfriend masturbating in the presence of a male friend substandard behavior. But I wouldn't have any problem at all with my girlfriend going to a male strip club and having the male stripper doing the equivalent of a lap dance to her.
fwiw, I don't go to strip clubs, myself. I've been a few times with friends over the years, so I know what it's all about. There's just lots of other things I'd rather be doing. That said, if my wife wanted to go to a male strip club with her girlfriends, it wouldn't bother me.
I would ask, anyone who participates in such behavior, how would you feel, if your wife was doing the same thing? To me, something like that is disgusting...and unacceptable.
Why is it, some guys think, what ever they do is ok, but if the wife does it...well...??????
anyway, my culture would definately call this cheating...period.
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Definately Cheating....
