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When I was growing up my Mom did most of the talking when family or friends came over...My Dad would sit at the table and listen but he hardly ever said anything himself...I see this same thing played out when I visit one of my friends today....She does all the talking. Her husband sits at the table or nearby just like my Dad used to do but rarely says anything himself...He prefers to let his wife do all of the talking for both of them...I try to include my friend's husband in the conversation at times just like I tried to include my Dad but it's always seemed like a "lost cause." Maybe men like this worry that they would be "stepping on their wives' toes" if they talk more. What do you think? Do you run into this situation very often? Thanks...
My husband is shy. I talk more than he does because he doesn't like small talk. I don't talk FOR him (if someone asks how his job is, I let him do all the talking). But if it's just a casual conversation amongst acquaintances, he'd often rather keep quiet, so I do my best to help him be comfortable. Sometimes I'll toss him soft balls to bring him into the conversation, sometimes I'll steer the conversation to things I know he's interested in, other times I'll do him a favor and not do that--to take the pressure off him.
First of all, you need to look at what you just wrote, specifically the use of the word "let". Women do not need to get permission from their husbands to speak.
Every relationship is different, just like people are different. If some women talk more than their husbands, that's just how it is. Besides, women are usually more verbal than men; it's just how we're wired.
If a husband feels his wife is running all over the conversation without taking others into consideration, it's up to him to address that issue with his wife in private. Likewise, if he feels the need to say something, he should just speak up.
This is because men get only 20,000 words to say per day. By the end of the day, they're out of words. Women get 40,000 words per day. By the end of the day, they still have 20,000 to go. So they just keep on talking. Men have finished their words and are quite content at that.
When I was growing up my Mom did most of the talking when family or friends came over...My Dad would sit at the table and listen but he hardly ever said anything himself...I see this same thing played out when I visit one of my friends today....She does all the talking. Her husband sits at the table or nearby just like my Dad used to do but rarely says anything himself...He prefers to let his wife do all of the talking for both of them...I try to include my friend's husband in the conversation at times just like I tried to include my Dad but it's always seemed like a "lost cause." Maybe men like this worry that they would be "stepping on their wives' toes" if they talk more. What do you think? Do you run into this situation very often? Thanks...
I would say most of my female friends will dominate the conversation when we go out on a double date. However, my boyfriend tends to be the more talkative in our relationship. So I tend to sit back and observe quietly...until the conversation peaks my interest, or I strongly disagree with something.
It seems like a "cultural thing." I think my Dad felt that it was my Mom's "job" to do most of the talking. When I called my parents on the phone my Dad seemed in a rush to pass the phone over to my Mom...I tried to keep him on the line a little longer so he and I could talk for a little bit too but he seemed uncomfortable about it...He seemed to feel obligated to pass me over to my Mom as soon as possible...This is the same thing that happens with my friend and her husband too...Just wondering about all of it.
Unless my husband has had some liquid encouragement, he tends not to do much talking in company, preferring to observe and add a line here or there. In large company, neither of us do much talking, letting the chatty folks run the show. Between us it's roughly equal talking time. That's how we roll being both fairly introverted, husband more so than I.
When I was growing up my Mom did most of the talking when family or friends came over...My Dad would sit at the table and listen but he hardly ever said anything himself...I see this same thing played out when I visit one of my friends today....She does all the talking. Her husband sits at the table or nearby just like my Dad used to do but rarely says anything himself...He prefers to let his wife do all of the talking for both of them...I try to include my friend's husband in the conversation at times just like I tried to include my Dad but it's always seemed like a "lost cause." Maybe men like this worry that they would be "stepping on their wives' toes" if they talk more. What do you think? Do you run into this situation very often? Thanks...
My old roommate and her long-term BF were like this.
The main reason wasn't because he was worried he'd "step on her toes," it's just that she was a very loud, outgoing person, and he was a very quiet, introverted person; she was the "OMG! BFF!" fashion student, and he was the prototypical computer nerd majoring in graphic design.
We got along pretty good, I'd give him a lift home every now and then and we'd chat, and I got him into some experimental electronic music. We still keep in contact once in awhile. He always talked about the same amount, though, which was not much
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