Why so many women "grow out" of being tomboys (girlfriend, love)

[Stumbler.]

I noticed that many female friends I went to school with (and later on kept in touch with through social networking), now in their 20s, and who do not show any signs of it anymore, were once extremely tomboyish, and had no interest in stereotypically "girly things" like how they dressed. That they call 'em "tomboys" is quite telling as it implies that it's a childhood thing.

I know that overall, it's a pretty well-known idea anyway that it's a childhood phase, but still it really strikes me as surreal to see a lass who used to play rough-and-tumble with the boys on the playground for years change into a totally different adult, now into shoes and shopping.

What do you think would be the trend in the first place? The consensus seems to be that it's a socialisation (the idea that men don't like tomboys, peer pressure from other girls). But there seems no equivalent for men -- I never hear stories about the girly, sissy boy who grew up into the macho man, through pressure or otherwise.

[Mikala43]

This is why I never view anyone I meet as one dimensional.

Growing up I hated dolls, spent my time climbing trees, dirt clod fights, making forts...

Teens through now... very into fashion, high heels, very feminine in appearance.

I also, shark dive, bungee jump, jet ski, paddle board, hike. My next vacation will be zip-lining and riding ATVs.

So which stereotype am I?

[artemis agrotera]

I'm similiar.
My dolls are in perfect condition.
I was more into riding bikes, playing football/cricket/you name it

Gradually I became more girly, but even now can be found outside playing sports with my brothers at family functions rather than sitting inside with the other females talking.

I wear makeup, dresses and heels - I don't like stereotypes

[TabulaRasa]

I hate shopping but love makeup.

I do yoga and I lift weights.

I grew up riding horses and playing in muddy creeks, but also love to bake and cook.

I don't care about sports, hate NASCAR, but like to shoot.

I can crochet, I can sew, and I can fish and guzzle beer.

I love Sex and the City and Bridget Jones and I love Tombstone and True Grit.

I prefer hanging out with my fellow womenfolk at family events, but in my friendships, have more fun hanging with the guys.

Labels are stupid.

[Stumbler.]

Okay, to be fair, these are stereotypical portrayals (My intent really wasn't to, but to ask about a trend, even if it's a perceived one) but there are a few questions I'm curious to address, if about those portrayals/images.

1) Why there is a perception that the "tomboy" image is thought of as a "phase" only.
2) Why it's rarely stereotyped for males. There's no girly boy growing into a stereotypical macho man perception or idea that's common.

[TabulaRasa]

Eh. My brother spent his childhood writing stories and playing make-believe. When he was a teenager, he was a big jock and pitched the state tournament for HS baseball. Now he's a journalist, back to writing...and not about sports.

People have more than one facet. Having different interests at different points in life isn't abnormal at all.

[Mikala43]

I think you are over thinking.

Nothing I do is really a phase-it's all a part of who I am. Same with anyone else.

People don't fit well into neat tidy boxes.

To play into your thoughts see the thread on the Feminizing of Men

[Stumbler.]

Originally Posted by TabulaRasa

People have more than one facet. Having different interests at different points in life isn't abnormal at all.

I completely agree with this. I'm curious though that certain ideas of changes in interest seem to go in one direction (or at least are perceived to, with age), in this case, having to do with gender.

I'll just throw another example that is unrelated to gender.

"The shy, introvert suddenly grows up to be the outgoing extrovert who is the life of the party" is a more common story than the "The once outgoing extrovert grows up and becomes a shy introvert."

Originally Posted by Mikala43

I think you are over thinking.

Maybe I am overthinking it, seeing the responses so far on this thread. I just was curious as to if anyone else noticed such a trend and had any thoughts on why it would be so.

[Sunflower_lol]

I think it's just part of who you are and nothing else.

I don't really fit the girly-girl nor tomboy label so don't know.... I'm just right in the middle. I don't like dresses, make-up nor elegant accessories. However, I adore my hair long and cats too. This is where my girly side comes to play.

[city_data91]

I think there's a reason for this trend. When they're kids, boys will enjoy being around tomboys because they have similar interests. But then when these tomboys grow up, they realize men don't want a manly girlfriend. That might explain why tomboys become feminine when they grow up.