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Last summer I tried to get a friend out of my life. I even got call blocking on my phone and blocked her emails. So she stopped by the house instead and apologized, and I felt sorry for her and gave in. We were okay for a while, but then I noticed that she was trying to save me.
It was as small as something like my writing to tell her that I quit reading a book because it was Christian, and the writer was using the book as a way to save people, plus the writer was putting down other religions. So i get an email from her (she is on vacation and will be back next month) with her telling me that not everyone in churches are connected to God, and on and on for three paragraphs. Even this summer she was trying to get me to go to church luncheons, etc.
I wrote her back and told her how I felt, but she acted like I said nothing, just as she always does, so instead of replying to what I said, she wrote about her trip. Last summer I kept emailing her that I didn't want to be her friend, for her to leave me alone, etc. but she still emailed me like nothing was said, and so that is when I blocked my emails and phone, but she stopped by.
So far I have told her again that I don't want to be friends, and I am getting caller id again, but I have a feeling she will drop by. I will have to not answer the door, or if I am in the yard walk into the house. And my husband finally supports me in this, whereas last time he said that I should answer the door.
But for some reason I feel like this won't be enough. One of my friends said that it sounds like she is believes that she is on a mission from God to save me, and so she won't give up. I just know her as someone who won't give up, but she could be belief that I need to be saved.
I don't even know if you can get a restraining order on something like this. But I do know that that I am losing sleep and peace of mind over it. Does anyone have any other suggestions? Thanks.
several things you could try, tell her you will call the police of she doesn't stop bothering you. if you feel that is too strong have your husband tell her to leave you alone. or tell her you do have a religion and it is not hers and that is all you will say on the subject. pr tell her you do not believe in fairy tales.
Wow I remember your thread from last time about this woman. I am not sure why you then decided to engage her in a theological debate. What were you thinking?
Just do what you did before. Block email and screen calls. Have hubby threaten her with a restraining order for harrassment. Try to relax. It does not sound like she is a danger. Your reaction is coming from somewhere else--misplaced guilt? Put that aside. You do not deserve to be harrassed.
Send her a registered letter that requires a signature and tell her that you do not wish to have any further contact with her and you respectfully request that she stop phoning, emailing and stopping by your home. Tell her that you consider her actions harassment at this point and that if she does not respect your wishes and continues to contact you, you will file a restraining order. Tell her "Please feel free to continue to pray for my soul from the privacy of your own home, but I request that you immediately cease and desist all contact with me directly or indirectly".
This SHOULD stop her. Basically, regardless of how much her actions are motivated by compassion for your soul's final destination, you are not interested in what she selling. The letter SHOULD stop her in her tracks, but if it doesn't, file a restraining order.
Last summer I tried to get a friend out of my life. I even got call blocking on my phone and blocked her emails. So she stopped by the house instead and apologized, and I felt sorry for her and gave in. We were okay for a while, but then I noticed that she was trying to save me.
It was as small as something like my writing to tell her that I quit reading a book because it was Christian, and the writer was using the book as a way to save people, plus the writer was putting down other religions. So i get an email from her (she is on vacation and will be back next month) with her telling me that not everyone in churches are connected to God, and on and on for three paragraphs. Even this summer she was trying to get me to go to church luncheons, etc.
I wrote her back and told her how I felt, but she acted like I said nothing, just as she always does, so instead of replying to what I said, she wrote about her trip. Last summer I kept emailing her that I didn't want to be her friend, for her to leave me alone, etc. but she still emailed me like nothing was said, and so that is when I blocked my emails and phone, but she stopped by.
So far I have told her again that I don't want to be friends, and I am getting caller id again, but I have a feeling she will drop by. I will have to not answer the door, or if I am in the yard walk into the house. And my husband finally supports me in this, whereas last time he said that I should answer the door.
But for some reason I feel like this won't be enough. One of my friends said that it sounds like she is believes that she is on a mission from God to save me, and so she won't give up. I just know her as someone who won't give up, but she could be belief that I need to be saved.
I don't even know if you can get a restraining order on something like this. But I do know that that I am losing sleep and peace of mind over it. Does anyone have any other suggestions? Thanks.
IANAL, but you should be able to get a restraining order against her for this kind of behavior, if she keeps it up. Talk to the police and/or a lawyer in your area.
Do you know the church she goes to? Would a word with the pastor/priest/minister help?
For me it would be time to get mean. You are being harrassed by a person with basically good intentions of trying to save you from eternal damnation in her mind.
But she has no right to push her beliefs on you and you should let her know in no uncertain terms that although she has the right to care, she does not have the right to push her beliefs on you.
I have Christian beliefs myself. But I never try to push or try to force my beliefs on others. I might bring up the subject but if they don't want to talk about I don't press.
Pressing the subject is a sure way of driving them off.
And if she doesn't let up you should drive her off if you aren't interested in her message.
That is your right.
This reminds me I had this Jehova's Witness couple trying to provide me with free sunday morning bible studies. They would come knocking on my door every sunday at 7:30am. This went on for a good two months while I try to avoid them instead of comfronting them.
One sunday I got home at 4am fully drunk from a night of hanging out and of course they knocked on the door at the usual time so I did what I had to do, I opened the door completely naked and asked them to come in, that I was having sex with the wife and would be done in a few hours and if they wouldn't mind to her moaning and screaming they could wait in the living room.
They stopped bugging after that.
When she comes back from vacation I will put these ideas into effect as soon as she stops by. I will let my husband talk to her if she doesn't go away. I am calling att&t this a.m. to get caller id. thanks so much to everyone.
Zentropa wrote: Wow I remember your thread from last time about this woman. I am not sure why you then decided to engage her in a theological debate. What were you thinking?
I thought it would drive her off. It doesn't. Nothing doesn't.
Last time I gave in because she came to the house, and my husband said that I had to answer the door even though I didn't wish to do so. Then she apologized for browbeating me about the meeting I told her I was not attending. Said I was her best friend, and I gave in. I wish I hadn't because the first time we went out to a yard sale, she said, "If I had my truck we could get grass bags." I didn't respond, and she didn't go get her truck. I knew then that she was going on vacation soon, but then when she got back it would start all over on her wanting help with picking up people's grass bags. I had even told her husband back then to tell her to stop bothering me, when she came over she said, "I never listen to my husband. teehee."
When she began preaching to me, I said I didn't want to talk religion. This last time in an email it got worse, and so I thought if I told her my views and laid them on strong, she would give up. She ignored what I said, waited 4 days, and wrote me like nothing happened. This is all crazy making to me. I am getting over my guilt fast.
I believe restraining orders are for people whom you fear will harm you. This woman is a nuisance but I don't know if I'd go so far as to say she is harassing you. I remember your thread from before as well. Stop talking to this woman. Come on, you're a grown up. Don't let her control you.
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