Changing another persons feelings? (boyfriend, how to, girl, lover)
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Just saw this other thread titled something like "if you can't change a persons feelings then what?"
But I mean the second before you meet someone they have no feelings of any kind for you(unless they're psychic);
How do you go about making them feel what you want them to feel about you? Because obviously between having zero ideas about a persons mere existence and having met them the feelings of the meeting person towards the other will inevitably have to changed from zero to something. How do you make this something a positive of the attraction kind?
The |d(F)/dt|, (F=feeling)in the meeting point t on the time axis where the vertical axis f stands for feeling simply has to be >0.(just ignore the joke if you don't get it)
good subject. With the current guy that I met, I didnt like him because of the way/tone when he was talking to me... so I disliked him off the bat. But then as I kept meeting him, I realized that I started to become attracted to him, and liked who he was/personality.
But for me my dilemma is that he is a shy guy (look for the shy guy thread!), so its harder to read his signals compared to other guys.. and ya at this point I like him, and Im hoping to change this into a positive mutual attraction.. yet for all i know I may as well be the only one chasing after him and he probably doesnt have any feelings for me in return. I feel like either they like you or not, you cant change/force a person to like you... You can sway them but not change them.
Last edited by cheeerioS; 03-14-2011 at 09:16 AM..
Meh, I think there's a misconception that you can "make" someone else feel something for you at all. Sure, you can influence it to some extent. Punching them in the face is likely to create a bad impression. Smiling is likely to create a better one. So yes, you can analyze your overall social skills and try to determine what tends to work more often than not, but there probably isn't any one "method" you could follow that would guarantee any girl would develop an attraction to you. What works for one girl will be a total fail for another because they have different wants for a potential boyfriend.
You can only present yourself in your most positive way, after that, there's either an instant attraction or not. Where there is no instant attraction, sometimes, with time, after you get to know a person, an attraction can develope!
There is this girl who I find drop dead gorgeous and in great shape. We are friends and enjoy going out and travelling together on vacation. My eyes find her attractive and we like to hang out but that’s about it. I wondered how it would be if we were more than friends. Have to admit we have our differences and as of now I can’t see ourselves in a relationship. Tried to see her more often with the hopes of something changing between us but naaaah. I just let it go instead and not stress it. If something naturally happens between us then cool and if not, the world can keep spinning.
You can't make a heart love somebody. Cliche', I know. But, true. I have no idea what to do tell you to do, other than be true to yourself, be who you are and what you are. And if they are attracted to you, then you know it's you they are interested in.
"How do you make this something a positive of the attraction kind?"
In answer to your question, you put your most positive foot forward. You be the best that you know how to be. If that doesn't produce a desired result, there is not much else to be done.
People get a first chance to make a positive impression. If the two people in question move in the same social circles, there may be a chance to correct that impression for the better or for worse by repeated contact. Other than this, there is no way to force, manipulate, out wait, or otherwise change the way a person feels about another.
And why would anyone want to be held captive to being something that they are not in order to impress, engage or hold onto another person? I can't imagine the underlying humiliation of that type of existence over the long run. Ultimately this subject is about self acceptance.
Just saw this other thread titled something like "if you can't change a persons feelings then what?"
But I mean the second before you meet someone they have no feelings of any kind for you(unless they're psychic);
How do you go about making them feel what you want them to feel about you? Because obviously between having zero ideas about a persons mere existence and having met them the feelings of the meeting person towards the other will inevitably have to changed from zero to something. How do you make this something a positive of the attraction kind?
The |d(F)/dt|, (F=feeling)in the meeting point t on the time axis where the vertical axis f stands for feeling simply has to be >0.(just ignore the joke if you don't get it)
I'm sorry nobody ever explained this to you before so that you'd be ahead of the game now
You can not EVER make someone feel love or attraction for you.
The best you can do is to make yourself the most attractive YOU that you can be.
Some will be drawn to that most attractive you, and some won't be.
When it appears that no one is attracted, just give it time.
Look at it this way...you (at your best) are a succulent luscious orange, but up til now all those around you only have a taste for apples.
The orange lovers are out there, they just haven't passed your way yet
And if I never pass an orange-eating creature, what then? "**** I shoulda gone to africa?"
What if the sun fails to rise tomorrow?
Why worry about stuff you can't control??
You are VERY young my friend. Concentrate right now on becoming the best man you can ever be...
Finish your education, take some dance lessons, work out and tone up, travel to broaden your world view, READ, LEARN, GROW UP.
When you've done all that you'll be so attractive that you'll have orange lovers all around you
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(just ignore the joke if you don't get it)
