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Old 04-27-2011, 10:40 AM
 
Location: Wu Dang Mountain
12,940 posts, read 21,647,952 times
Reputation: 8681

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Quote:
Originally Posted by WFW&P View Post
Tolstoy on on toilet paper packaging, now's there's some reading material to wipe your a** by.
They could have a whole series of famous authors - kind of a collectible thing.

"I'll trade you 12 sheets of Shakespeare for 3 sheets of Vonnegut!"

Quote:
So far we've:
cut our hair,
shaved our legs,
groomed the nuts,
now all is left is to wax our butts!
Shaved my legs and cut my hair
Made sure that my nuts were bare
Time to get a waxing done
Upon my expansive bum

Heat the wax up, lay the strips
Mold it to the peaks and dips
One bad thing 'bout waxing back:
Some falls into my vast crack

"Waxy Butt!" they'll scream and shout
Make me look like I have gout
But through all their comments snide
O'er the floor my butt will glide

~Burma-Shave

 
Old 04-27-2011, 11:03 AM
 
2,650 posts, read 3,016,808 times
Reputation: 3466
Why stop at the packaging? Put it on the tp itself. " to crap or not to crap, that is the question" lol
 
Old 04-27-2011, 12:44 PM
 
Location: Fort Worth, TX
9,394 posts, read 15,713,309 times
Reputation: 6264
single-ply toilet paper is the invention of Satan.
 
Old 04-27-2011, 06:05 PM
 
12,572 posts, read 15,590,877 times
Reputation: 8960
Quote:
Originally Posted by SifuPhil View Post
They could have a whole series of famous authors - kind of a collectible thing.

"I'll trade you 12 sheets of Shakespeare for 3 sheets of Vonnegut!"


Shaved my legs and cut my hair
Made sure that my nuts were bare
Time to get a waxing done
Upon my expansive bum

Heat the wax up, lay the strips
Mold it to the peaks and dips
One bad thing 'bout waxing back:
Some falls into my vast crack

"Waxy Butt!" they'll scream and shout
Make me look like I have gout
But through all their comments snide
O'er the floor my butt will glide

~Burma-Shave
Ole!! LMAO!
 
Old 04-27-2011, 06:10 PM
 
12,572 posts, read 15,590,877 times
Reputation: 8960
Quote:
Originally Posted by HurricaneDC View Post
single-ply toilet paper is the invention of Satan.
Comparitively speaking when you examine the size of a square of toilet paper and, what you are asking it to do, with the size of a square of facial tissue, the intended application doesn't make sense.
You could say it's a load of crap.
 
Old 04-27-2011, 08:37 PM
 
27,955 posts, read 39,858,132 times
Reputation: 26197
Quote:
Originally Posted by HurricaneDC View Post
single-ply toilet paper is the invention of Satan.
Fold it over to make it a multi-ply paper.
 
Old 04-27-2011, 08:57 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,831 posts, read 88,262,086 times
Reputation: 22814
Geez, men are such funny chickens sometimes! I stopped for a cup of coffee in a Starbucks that happens to have 2 smoking tables. It was pretty windy and I was fixing my flying all over hair while some guy was about to leave taking his time around his Harley (didn't look like a typical Harley dude, though; I'm not friendly with those). He made a comment about the wind (you see, male forumites, it doesn't take much to start a conversation ), we exchanged a few words, and he decided to also have a smoke and asked if he could join me. However, he "joined" me by sitting at the other table! Poor scared Americans...

We talked a little bit, he asked if I live in this area, told me where he lived, introduced himself, asked for my name, asked if I go there often, lingered around a little bit longer, and left. Granted, he may be married, but a few things made me not think so... First, he mentioned he lived on a golf course (you'd think trying to impress); second, while he was leaving he smiled and gestured to the back seat. What if I had taken him on his offer?! Not that I would've since I was wearing a long dress and high heels (well, I wouldn't have anyway, but he doesn't know that), but it was too close for comfort to his son's neighborhood (which turned out to be mine) and to his own. In other words, not a good idea if he's married...

Maybe he'll lament on some forum tonight how he could've done something, but didn't!
 
Old 04-27-2011, 09:18 PM
 
17,869 posts, read 21,029,608 times
Reputation: 13949
Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ View Post
Geez, men are such funny chickens sometimes! I stopped for a cup of coffee in a Starbucks that happens to have 2 smoking tables. It was pretty windy and I was fixing my flying all over hair while some guy was about to leave taking his time around his Harley (didn't look like a typical Harley dude, though; I'm not friendly with those). He made a comment about the wind (you see, male forumites, it doesn't take much to start a conversation ), we exchanged a few words, and he decided to also have a smoke and asked if he could join me. However, he "joined" me by sitting at the other table! Poor scared Americans...

We talked a little bit, he asked if I live in this area, told me where he lived, introduced himself, asked for my name, asked if I go there often, lingered around a little bit longer, and left. Granted, he may be married, but a few things made me not think so... First, he mentioned he lived on a golf course (you'd think trying to impress); second, while he was leaving he smiled and gestured to the back seat. What if I had taken him on his offer?! Not that I would've since I was wearing a long dress and high heels (well, I wouldn't have anyway, but he doesn't know that), but it was too close for comfort to his son's neighborhood (which turned out to be mine) and to his own. In other words, not a good idea if he's married...

Maybe he'll lament on some forum tonight how he could've done something, but didn't!
Aw shucks. you're into bikers?

There goes my chances!
 
Old 04-27-2011, 09:19 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,831 posts, read 88,262,086 times
Reputation: 22814
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prince_Frog View Post
Aw shucks. you're into bikers?

There goes my chances!
No, I'm not. I already mentioned he didn't look like one.
 
Old 04-27-2011, 09:22 PM
 
17,869 posts, read 21,029,608 times
Reputation: 13949
You're right! Overlooked it.

Damn these pills. They're zonking me early!
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