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Meeting someone at a Charity event and going for Coffee means nothing as far as romance goes. Skating or asking someone out to dinner is usually considered a date.
Keep on asking woman out, have fun, and hopefully it will click with one of them if your looking for long term romance. One thing is for sure, you will become more socialized to the dating world and feel more comfortable talking to the opposite sex if you date. Don't be afraid of rejection as there is always someone who will go out with you if one says no.
Not speaking for other guys but.. if I ask a women to spend time with me it is because I am interested in exploring a relationship. Why would I spend money on some strange person otherwise? The only time this is not the case is during the course of business. Such as grabbing a coffee or meal with a fellow worker. I simply am uninterested in regular friendship. Guys are friends, women are potential mates.
Lunch can be very romantic, Sierra. It is all in the setting.
going for Coffee means nothing as far as romance goes.
I disagree. Maybe a coffee date isn't all that romantic, but I like it for first dates. The romantic potential will come from your demeanor during said coffee date.
I'm not a huge fan of extravagant-sweep-her-off-her-feet first dates. Those can come a little later. For me, the first date is all about good conversation and laughing a lot. If interest is garnered, then go for the nicer dates.
The first date with husband was a lunch date. It was lovely. I think the offering of food has a subconscious component to it that indicates more than a platonic interest. But maybe that is just my own connection between food and love.
I'm wondering whether I should make my intentions more clear when asking a girl out, than just asking them if they want to do such and such with me - because I can't quite gauge a girls' interest level in me unless being direct.
Recently I asked 'out' a girl who I work with, and had gotten to know pretty well one day, if she would like to go roller-skating with me friday - she agreed, but I can't tell if she acquiesced just to be polite, or knowing that I work with her, wants to be friends, etc. I just don't feel comfortable enough to ask a girl out on a date who I know very little about, so I usually settle for some activity or place to meet and leave my choice of words limited to just that - and in doing so maybe give the girls the wrong idea.
The reason I ask is because a couple months back I met a girl through a charity event and she agreed to get coffee with me (her decision, as I just asked if she had any 'free time' on that day), but during the course of the conversation - which I thought went well - she mentioned how she has a boyfriend, and then said she would like to meet up again. Are my intentions not clear enough here? Why would a girl with a boyfriend agree to get coffee with a stranger male?
I'm still new to asking girls out so I haven't experienced any flat-out rejections from which to learn, so this makes me unsure of how they think about me.
Girls, would you always agree to go out with a guy that you barely know, if he was nice?
I'm guessing she thought your intentions were friendly and nothing more. You might need to be more direct about what you want from them (if more people did that there'd be less confusion out there). But there's a fine line too between letting your intentions be known and coming on too strong, which I guess I can't really help you with other than not planning your life together on a second date haha. Other than that, I myself am pretty careful but I'd be comfortable dating a stranger if it was somewhere public.
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