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This is a delicate subject so I will do my best to be tactful and not too graphic as I'm serious about what I'm going to write.
I'm wondering if my girlfriend is actually enjoying our love life and is satisfied even if she's not having "rocking her world" type orgasms.
She claims that she has multiple orgasms when we're intimate but they must be very mild because while I suspect she's having one I'm not positive. I don't see the eyes rolling in the back of the head, heavy stomach/groin contractions, etc that I've seen with previous partners. She's quiet and "purrs' a little but nothing approaching moaning.
We have a great connection and chemistry and are both very much in love, so the relationship is solid. We enjoy a lot of foreplay and cuddle afterwards. She loves to kiss and we kiss for long periods so I think the attraction is there. In other words I think the "intangibles' are there. I'm just wondering if she's really experiencing orgasms and if she is, is she really satisfied.
She's not a big 'talker' so she doesn't like to discuss the subject. She tells me she's content and if we discuss it she'll become paranoid and it could be more difficult for her so I shouldn't worry about something that's not a problem. I've asked her to 'show or tell me" what she likes but she hasn't, saying things are fine and she's happy.
I know I'm comparing her to previous lovers but that's a normal frame of reference. I love her very much and want her to be satisfied...but am wondering if she can really be having orgasms and multiple ones at that, and be content if they're not 'intense'.
Ask her. If she says she's satisfied, take her at her word.
Plenty of women are quiet when they have orgasm. In fact, sometimes the only reason they make noise is to give affirmation to their partner.
She could just be a quiet comer. It's fine that you've asked her if she's satisfied but if you keep asking her and asking her, she's going to become self-conscious and stop enjoying things.
My guess is that she is NOT experiencing what your previous partners were...and probably she hasn't ever total satisfaction with a man...so therefore feels self consious.
I don't know how old she is- but that is not as uncommon as you would think if she is in her twenties.
The longer you are together- the more likely she will "warm up".
If everything else is going great- I wouldn't worry.
Be patient and let her know that she can be herself with you.]
(You sound like a wonderful boyfriend...she's a lucky girl)
If she's young, she may have never had an orgasm much less multiples. Or she could just be shy about really letting go with you.
I don't know any woman who knows her body and has had orgasms that has never guided her partner. It's not your fault or that you are a bad lover, it's just that every one is different. So if she hasn't said anything and gets uncomfortable even discussing it...well, it leads me to believe she doesn't really know what's going on with her body. In this case, time works in your favor. Keep at it and you may get a break through! Maybe buy her a toy and let her explore. It isn't easy for women to get into sex with a man for quite a while unlike what is commonly thought by all men that the younger they are, the hotter. In looks but not always sexually.
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