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Breeding not enough to conclude that someone doesn't suck. Just ask the tons of deadbeat parents who are not in the lives of their offspring. But hey they aren't losers because they got to breed.
Now, i wasn't just talking about "I don't have a girlfriend this year for the holiday office party" type people -- but those that cannot find partners or connect at all. Well if you look at the scenario as a whole not just in terms of "breeding" but humanity and human nature, these people are not in the plus category as far as life goes that's for sure. Isn't that the 'point' of humans? Even the losers you suggested are bad parents or what not, they were able to do "something" in that area of life. The only way I know how to describe what I mean is by referencing what someone else told me awhile back; 'people like this are biological failures on almost every level (socially, sexually, psychologically, etc.). It's like a defect in the species or something I don't know.
Hmm OP, this just a form of doubt. Never doubt yourself, ever. Get that thought out of your mind now. Keep a subtle feeling inside you; a feeling that you are needed and wanted; a feeling of warmth and closeness. More so just tell yourself this is what you want and the person is waiting for you to walk around that next doorway, or corner, or bridge-crossing.
Now, as soon as I moved I told a lot of people I'm sick of being alone. This spiraled down when I moved and I really cared for someone, which I don't think I'll ever go back to anytime soon. My mom told me to write down a list of things I want in a woman. I don't doubt it will work; however, it has helped me to believe in what I really want.
P.s., Just because you don't have a girlfriend it doesn't mean you suck, it just sucks knowing what you're really missing.
Yeah, I know, the theory of evolution says that if you don't breed, your life was a waste, but who cares about all that. We're humans. Sure evolution affects us too, but we have higher purposes. We can make a difference in this world, even if we don't pass on our genes. In fact, as human beings I think that our purpose is far more than to breed, and that so many human beings are breeding in this world that breeding by any one individual is really of tiny importance. We can make a difference in so many people's lives, and that is what really counts ... the difference we make, and the legacy we leave. If having children is part of your legacy, that's fine. But it isn't as important as society wants us to believe.
My genes suck anyways from a survival and mental health point of view, so I don't know why I'd want to pass them on anyways. I'd be giving my progeny a rough ride.
So here's the deal, yeah all the TV shows and politicans and movies and all that garbage tell us that all cool people get laid. Every hero in the movies ends up with the girl and they kiss and all that junk. Everybody who's cool in all the sit-coms and all that garbage has a girlfriend or wife or whatever. And the politicians say that all that matters is "our children" and "our families".
But I say that's all fine and good, but it isn't going to make me depressed. I think there's far more important in this life than me getting a girlfriend.
I know I'm never going to have a girlfriend, and I'm trying to come to peace with that fact. It kind of sucks, but you know what ? It doesn't really matter. I can focus on far more important things.
I agree with you...even though I am a mother of one...the whole archaic debate of the purpose of humans is to reproduce and anything less is a waste of oxygen? False...
There are def.many higher callings and good that can be done..
As far as Never having a gf...do not ever give up...do not go on a crusade but if it comes knocking know the difference...
Yeah, I know, the theory of evolution says that if you don't breed, your life was a waste, but who cares about all that.
.............
I know I'm never going to have a girlfriend, and I'm trying to come to peace with that fact. It kind of sucks, but you know what ? It doesn't really matter. I can focus on far more important things.
What about couples who can't have kids? Is their life a waste too?
There are so many important things that one can do with one's life. More and more, men in particular see this and are leaving the breeding to those who can pop out kids who will be appreciated for what they are rather than having to work extremely hard to maybe just perhaps impress someone and probably never be successful.
It's a jungle out there and more and more, as the generations slip by, an increasing proportion of the population is much better looking than they were decades ago. If you don't believe me, look at class pictures in any school with many decades of them, to see what I mean. Do you want your kids to be put into that jungle?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Antlered Chamataka
The most important thing in man's life is a woman.
I've never had a girlfriend. So, I'm more alone than you think. I'd bet that maybe 0.1% of American men my age have never had a girlfriend.
Don't be so dramatic. If you are under 30, it is probably over 30% like you. Remember, a majority of younger women expend all their effort trying to attract a very thin slice of men. They hate me when I inform them that most of these guys always have at least three women in a position of thinking that they are "the one". The real pros have several more than that, in that position and there is also the "churn", meaning that these guys often have one to two dozen a year.
Guys like you see all this activity and think that it applies to all men but you, when the fact is, women consider 80% of men to be below average and many, many of these guys get little or no action or consideration, year after year.
It's only when women get over 35 or sometimes over 40 and start to realize that their future prospects are dim, that they start to consider these guys even worth a slight consideration. And then it's only if they have assets and a good cash flow.
Don't be so dramatic. If you are under 30, it is probably over 30% like you. Remember, a majority of younger women expend all their effort trying to attract a very thin slice of men. They hate me when I inform them that most of these guys always have at least three women in a position of thinking that they are "the one". The real pros have several more than that, in that position and there is also the "churn", meaning that these guys often have one to two dozen a year.
Guys like you see all this activity and think that it applies to all men but you, when the fact is, women consider 80% of men to be below average and many, many of these guys get little or no action or consideration, year after year.
It's only when women get over 35 or sometimes over 40 and start to realize that their future prospects are dim, that they start to consider these guys even worth a slight consideration. And then it's only if they have assets and a good cash flow.
I don't know why, but when I think about it...this sort of makes sense
Not to get off topic, but actually it does when you look at the "point" of humanity. (this is my opinion).
And I guess you believe that the point of humanity is to procreate. I disagree with this. There are enough members of humanity procreating already. Who cares if one's particular genes are being passed on. The contributions a person can make to humanities overall survival can be far greater than having more children.
Now that you know that about yourself, maybe you can begin to put yourself in situations, to find somebody that would appreciate that.
Uh ... not likely. I get extremely nervous around women. I can't imagine myself being social with women. I'm even afraid of being around married women at work, I act really shy and nervous around them even though I'm not romantically interested in them.
Now, i wasn't just talking about "I don't have a girlfriend this year for the holiday office party" type people -- but those that cannot find partners or connect at all. Well if you look at the scenario as a whole not just in terms of "breeding" but humanity and human nature, these people are not in the plus category as far as life goes that's for sure. Isn't that the 'point' of humans? Even the losers you suggested are bad parents or what not, they were able to do "something" in that area of life. The only way I know how to describe what I mean is by referencing what someone else told me awhile back; 'people like this are biological failures on almost every level (socially, sexually, psychologically, etc.). It's like a defect in the species or something I don't know.
I'm sorry, but this sounds pretty darn sick and wrong to me.
So if someone saves thousands of lives with his humanitarian efforts or great inventions or life's work but he never breeds or is very good at connecting with people socially, he's a loser. But some deadbeat dad who's sons end up living on the streets is more of a winner because he was able to pork someone.
It's only when women get over 35 or sometimes over 40 and start to realize that their future prospects are dim, that they start to consider these guys even worth a slight consideration. And then it's only if they have assets and a good cash flow.
I have one those those in mind right now... she is actually in her 50's.
She looked up an ex she lived with 30 years ago.
The story goes they had lived together for 2 years and were on the
brink of getting married but she backed out and moved out.
Apparently she treated him like crap during the time they were together.
Fast forward 30 years... she looks him up and they start seeing each
other again.
She figures because he has forgiven her for the past bad treatment
that all is good, but what she does not realize is that his forgiveness
is more for himself so he can move forward with her 30 years later
unencumbered by the past baggage in their relationship.
According to her... he was slim but is now quite obese but she can
"deal with that". I'm not sure exactly what is meant by that.
She considered their past relationship very close... but the fact
is how close could it have been given her poor treatment of him
and her walking away from a marriage about to happen.
Very odd situation. The only reason I know about all this is that I'm
the one in the background that was hoping to develop something
slowly with her... and then she dumps all this on me like I'm another
girlfriend she is gushing to about a new boyfriend.
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