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Rejection stings. Period. I always appreciate someone being honest whether it's been 2 dates, 2 months, or 20 years. Be glad she told you instead of stringing you along or just falling off the face of the earth. It doesn't really matter if the reasons she gave you are true, shallow, or just an excuse...the point is she doesn't want to see you anymore, and you have to accept that and move on. You'll find someone else!
1, a lot can happen in 2 months, time doesn't mean you should not respect someone. 2, if people think this way, (You should be grateful she told you at all instead of just not responding to your calls) and think that kind of dissing is ok, no wonder the dating world is a lot of hurt.
The dating world will always be a lot of hurt because being rejected hurts. Personally I don't really care how someone does it, the outcome is it's over and that's all that matters.Toughen up.
The dating world will always be a lot of hurt because being rejected hurts. Personally I don't really care how someone does it, the outcome is it's over and that's all that matters.Toughen up.
it sounds like she thought you wanted to improve you current way of living and when you showed no signs of ever wanting to she decided it was time to look for someone else closer to what she was looking for.
She at 1st said, it was since I wasnt an avid cyclist and she was. However, I never said no towards that and said I'd be willng to do it anytime, at least casually, with the hopes of doing it seriously, like she did.
48 me, 58 her.
I think if you have an excellent start with someone, that should speak volumes, because it could change one's mind on what is really important in their mind, to find that long term happiness and someone special.
She wants a more active man with the same interests as her. Move on.
I think it would be more important at 50. At this point in ones live you cant afford to lose what assests you have. I think its only smart to realize you need to be with someone with more equal financial stability as yourself.
In reality that initial attraction fades somewhat. We are often blinded to or fooled by behaviors and character in the early stages of a relationship. What might be fun or not important for dating becomes important when your looking at till death do us part. given she has two marriages under her belt she is probably more cautious.
So true. I'm 40 and while retirement isn't in my near future, I need to be making decisions now for when that time comes. In your 50s, you're starting to get closer to retirement age and need to have financial plans for how you're going to provide for yourself for the rest of your life. I think it would be crucial to be with someone who also has their finances in order. At 26 you simply aren't in the time of life to be thinking of those things, but it is real and you will notice it as you age. Different stages of life bring different concerns, all of which are magnified if you're in the dating world versus a marriage/LTR.
1, a lot can happen in 2 months, time doesn't mean you should not respect someone. 2, if people think this way, (You should be grateful she told you at all instead of just not responding to your calls) and think that kind of dissing is ok, no wonder the dating world is a lot of hurt.
The problem is that when women give men their reasons for "it's not working out", the guys immediately start addressing each point, and arguing with it. Like you're doing here. Some guys just can't accept "it's not working out" and move on. They have to stay and argue, as if those points are up for discussion, which they're not. So women may invent reasons that can't be argued against, or they may avoid any confrontation at all, as someone posted earlier. They just fade out of your life.
Sorry it didn't work out, but if she felt it wasn't a good match at some point, then wouldn't you prefer she told you, rather than possibly dragging it out over months, when you'd be even more emotionally involved, or worse yet, getting into a marriage that wouldn't have lasted?
All people have their own checklist of what they are looking for and are comfortable with. Obviously even your checklist didn't match up with her's, shallow or not. If you are looking for someone with more soul and character than what you see her as having then it's time for you to move on and find someone who does have those characteristics that you deem as attractive qualities to you.
I think on some level people in their 50's and above have to be sorta pragmatic about certain things. For her, having "things" is perceived as being stable. I can understand this thinking to a degree. You ain't getting any younger and people have a right to feel the way she does.
I personally think it's shallow, and for me, the older I get, the more those types of things don't matter. I mean, as long as you have the basics and can take care of yourself...... I'm sorta thinking about selling my house when I retire and traveling the country in an RV.... LOL, but that's for another thread.....
The problem is that when women give men their reasons for "it's not working out", the guys immediately start addressing each point, and arguing with it. Like you're doing here. Some guys just can't accept "it's not working out" and move on. They have to stay and argue, as if those points are up for discussion, which they're not. So women may invent reasons that can't be argued against, or they may avoid any confrontation at all, as someone posted earlier. They just fade out of your life.
Sorry it didn't work out, but if she felt it wasn't a good match at some point, then wouldn't you prefer she told you, rather than possibly dragging it out over months, when you'd be even more emotionally involved, or worse yet, getting into a marriage that wouldn't have lasted?
You make an excellent point, which might explain why some people break up by text, or just disappear altogether, because the "dumpee" can't accept it gracefully and move on and is trying to fight the inevitable.
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I'm sorta thinking about selling my house when I retire and traveling the country in an RV.... LOL, but that's for another thread.....
